Blonde LOGIC

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench

talking…….. and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is

farther away……….Florida or the moon?"

The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see

Florida…?"

CAR TROUBLE!

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic

it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.

She says, “What’s the story?”

He replies, “Just crap in the carburetor”

She asks, “How often do I have to do that?” !

SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very

nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act

together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you

expect me to show it to you!"

RIVER WALK

There’s this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees

another blonde on the opposite bank. “Yoo-hoo!” she shouts, "How can I

get to the other side?"

The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts

back, “You ARE on the other side.”

AT THE DOCTOR’S OFFICE

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor’s office and said

that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

“Impossible!” says the doctor. “Show me.”

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her lef! t breast and

screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She

pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and

screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The doctor said, "You’re not really a redhead, are you?

“Well, no” she said, “I’m actually a blonde.”

“I thought so,” the doctor said. “Your finger is broken.”

KNITTING

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway.

Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the

wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing

lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his

bullhorn and yelled, “PULL OVER!”

“NO!” the blonde yelled back, “IT’S A SCARF!”

BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian

said, “We were the first in space!”

The American said, “We were the first on the moon!”

The Blonde said, "So what? We’re go! ing to be the first on the

sun!"

The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their

heads. “You can’t land on the sun, you idiot! You’ll burn up!” said the

Russian.

To which the Blonde replied, "We’re not stupid, you know. We’re

going at night!"

IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn.

She rolled the dice and she landed on Science &Nature. Her question was,

“If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?”

She thought for a time and then asked, “Is it on or off?”

FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new

dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde re! sponded by

saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.

Her friend said, “Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?”

“HELLLOOOOOOO……,” answered the blond. “They’re watch dogs!”

Blonde LOGIC

Warren. A. Williams

Joined November 2007

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