Hooker for Halloween

“How you doing?”

“Good,” the prostitue replies, swinging her handbag lightly and looking over her shoulder.

“How much.”

She flips back her hair, gives me a stare. Ha. That rhymes. Anyway, she flips back her hair, gives me a stare, and says:

“Lots.”

“How much is lots?”

She looks away again. She’s not interested. Bitch.

“I don’t know.”

“Like, $50? $60?”

“How should I know?”

I’m getting the brush-off. The brush-off from a hooker in leather pants. Tight leather pants and a leather tube top. I am getting the brush-off from a cheap, stereotypical, fashionably challenged hooker. She has poorl highlighted hair down to her breasts. She has too much makeup. And she’s brushing off me?

“Hell no.”

“Excuse me?”

“Listen whore, I’ll give you $50 because you don’t look too run-down,okay?”

She looks frightened. Good.

“Daddy!”

What? We’re playing that game now?

“What?”

Her pimp shows up. But he looks awfully clean cut for a pimp.

“Daddy, this man called me a whore!”

“WHAT?”

I look at her. A little more closely. Her face…..her size…I just thought she was petite. I look around. Across the street, a witch and a Batman skip. Literally, skip. Oh, sh-

“Listen, mister.”

I hold up both of my hands. The bottle drops and shatters to the ground. He advances, fists balled up.

“Dude, I thought she was a hooker, my bad.”

“She’s Ashley Tisdale, you son of a bitch!!!”

Hooker for Halloween

William H

Joined December 2007

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Artist's Description

Was going to be for Sugar High Comp, but not enough words. Fun little story, though, so I published it anyway.

Artwork Comments

  • butchart
  • Matthew Dalton
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