dont run from anything you cant see

I really am a coward. I should have not run away from the problem and gone off and got drunk and driven as well, not just cuz its illegal, I think a lot of illegal things should be legal, but cuz the problem will only build up and become even harder to deal with. not only am I hungover and hit with a bad TV epsiode of my clinical cynical depression but I wasted money on her so she could get get stoned and not feel guilty for getting with me and it really is just a glorified case of prostitution when you narrow it down. Fuck that I dont inject drugs but is supporting someone so they can do it just as horrible??? I tknew deep down she wanted to get off it. I hought I was over this pathetic immature person but they still dwell inside me. I need a minder to watch over me some. I was only focused on myself and what I would get out of it. I wish I could die for a few days and come back with everything past me and no shit hanging over me. blah blah blah etc etc I do not recognise this world as mine. this cant be it

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