been feeling kind of sad lately i think its because its christmas and you think about the ones who are not here and I have lost 6 people in 2 years so need some happy times now and the hardest is going to be this christmas because my children have no dad because he died in july and this is their first christmas without him so I have to make it up to them, they are great kids always helping me , I feel really sorry for them all they have is me and its hard to be strong but I got to do it for them. I have promised to dress up christmas day in a santa dress they even bought me red tights lol so that should be fun. I am going to give my children something to be proud of and thats me and since doing design work at college i want to be a designer its interesting doing research and drawing and coming up with ideas, so my aim is going to be artist/poet/.designer so I have got a lot of work to get on with too but I will manage I always do one thing I have is determination!

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