Journal

happy as larry

happy as larry

ok so i’m the last person that ever thought i could be this happy again. But you know what. I have even surprised my self. I’m so happy i could cry. But why am i so happy i hear you ask? Well that’s a little secret at the moment but all will be revieled in time. Theres a few thing’s that need sorting first! Hehe!

Anyway i’m just sat on the train. On my way back to hull a little sad a little happy but at the same time content in knowing i am me again. A whole person! How i should be. How i alway’s wanted to be. I have found the one for me. He was alway’s there i just didn’t know it.

Anyway ha i’l stop going on now lol!

Fureiya

unconsious rambelings of a spber mind part 2

unconsious rambelings of a spber mind part 2
Current mood: distraught…

why do i do it to my self really why do i let them in always knowing that one thing will lead to another and i will get hurt, my heart hurts because of the pain , my emotions are streched to braking point ive run out of cigarets, and thats the least of my problems, i try be there fr some on as a friend regardles of the hirtory between us knowing that i will only end up getting hurt in the proces by being told something i really dont want to hear, and yet i do it i pretend to not care i pretend as thought it doesnt faze me, but you know what it fucking hurts, and yet im stupid enought to do it over and over and over again, because that is who i am.

now if you havent yet realised im extreamly stressed out, and in despora

unconsious rambelings of a sober mind

unconsious rambelings of a sober mind
“Rock and roll hey, don’t you know, baby that we’re all alone now
Give me something to sing about…

Nothing compares to a quiet evening alone
Just the one, two I was just counting on
That never happens
I guess I’m dreaming again
Let’s be more than’ no”

Im beginning to realise that life isn’t as simple as people want it to be , it never is , life is to complicated, just look at the world for god sake, life cant be a move life isn’t a soap opera, its not a funny sit com and its never gonna have a happy ending its life and unfortunately you have to go threw the shit times to remember the good times, and unfortunately you have to kiss a few frogs before you find your prince, me how ever I only ever seem to kiss the frogs then one day , one day I think to my self

diary of a singleton

its over , im no longer with child yesterday i had the baby teerminated, abborted, taken away. as if it never existed, and how do i feel about that. if im honest im devostated but im not gonna shead a tear. it was my dessision and in the current situation it was the only option, the man that once said he loved me made his feelings quite clear, replacing me with in days of braking up if not before. i feel lowere than ever , empty inside, i have a great feelig of loss. like something has died within me. and i guess that is true. what can i do now, where can i go from here. my heart still yearns and calles out for him in my sleep. i should be relived but im not i should be elated as my situation which has been so greem over passing weeks has been resolved but however i SHOULD be feeling im n…

confused and alone

my heart and my head are in tattors, i know what i want and what i want is him, i saw him, i felt it , i felt the embrace of love again when he huged me, but was it just a lie, was he just saying he missed me to make me feel better. giving me a fauls hope that maybe things could be, i dont know what i do know is my heart is unchanging every time i see his name flash up on my phone my heart skips a beat.…

but why should he want me why should anyone want some one like me. im not special, theres nothing good about me why should any one say they love me, he used to say it all the time, i miss that, i miss his smell i miss his eyes i miss the way he used to stare at me even thought i used to tell him off for it, i mis how he used to cuddle me on the sofa how he always tryed to make me smile eve

diary of a pregnant singlton

sotoday was the day of reconing, i got my slef checked out, pocked proded and pricked (with needles that is) i had my consultation at the doctors to sort out this horrible mess. one thing that this whole thing has tought me is not to just sit on my lorals as it were and pray it will go away cos next time it’ll either be too late or well kill me. anyway today was interesting i got to the hospital early and i still had to wait i was put on the scails taken in with the nurse to check details went for an ultra sound which was very scary, i saw the baby on the screen! its less than a milimeter at the moment but it has fingers toas and a face its very un nerving not only that but i saw the heart beat. they wouldnt let me have the scan pictures somthing to do with the fact im not keeping it and …

love sick

im sick of keeping quiet, im having my say. im 23 im around 11 weeks pregnant and pocible now suffering from the on set of depression because of what has happened. i cant do anything i stay in bed all day and if im not crying im sleeping. everyone (parents and family) is very worryed bout me and a few select friends also seem concerened but the one person i wish was conserned bout me doesnt seem to give a crap.…

it all started bout a week ago when he broke up woth me so i went home for the day that night he turned round and said he was sorry even went as for as saying he wanted to marry me, so i said ok and we got back together i went home early next day and we spend the rest of the say together then on the saturday i worked at the pub all day till 7 and expected to spend some time with hi

desktop tablet-landscape content-width tablet-portrait workstream-4-across phone-landscape phone-portrait
desktop tablet-landscape content-width tablet-portrait workstream-4-across phone-landscape phone-portrait