just the friend

I like you!
I’m gonna kill myself, right now!
Opening up to me! That’s it! Fuck me!

you better tell me you like me right now!!!

Kill me!

Why do I put myself into these situations, where I think that someone likes me, but they actually don’t, we’re just GOOD fucking friends, always a friend,
ALWAYS a friend just a friend!

he doesn’t like me, he has a whole bunch of other girls in his life, that are cuter than me, prettier than me, better than me, thinner than me, everything than me.

I should just face it, I’ll never have sex, never, NEVER, what’s the point, I’ll probably never even kiss a boy, ever again, that was it, eighth grade, I better have enjoyed it.

Maybe I should lose weight??? <barf>

How easy, and I thought he liked me, thank god I didn’t say anything, now I’ll just be longing to be with him, all those fantasies, about, shit, a “relationship” why do I do that to myself, only to be disappointed, I knew that shit was gonna happen, it always happens like that.

I’ll stop flirting, stop trying to be cute, there’s no point, all I know how to do is be a friend, all I know how to do is be me.

Maybe I seem inaccessible, like I’m so everything, but in reality I’m so nothing. No wonder matt left me, I can’t give love, I’m virtually incapable of it, or I seem that way, I’M NOT, GOD DAMN IT!!!

We had a good talk, fo’ real, want to cry!

am deprived

not a lesbian, not anything, basically, dead, to everyone else

motherfucker

No one wants to listen, and when I think somebody cares, they DO, but… not that….. they don’t… want to kiss me!

KISS ME!!!

I’m so silent, I have no opinion, please!

tomorrow we shall hang…

HANG, and be friends!

I don’t want to be fake, all I want to be is myself, but I hate it, everything I hate is everything I want to be, I don’t hate them, I’m jealous that they have girlfriends, and they get boyfriends and they kiss, and “hook-up” and I’m not eligible, I’m in the effing corner, crying…not crying, watching!!! Watching, I look and watch and stare, and want, and yearn, and life is like everything I need, life is the muse, this is what is happening, and it sucks and it hurts.

and I knew it, I knew it, FRIEND!!!!

It’s not a broken heart, cuz I knew all along, I fucking knew, I’m a friend, he could never like me like that, and cuz I have no idea what I’m doing, no one will ever know.

what i want.

he won’t know.

That for a couple of weeks he was the love of my life.

thank god…

just the friend

Samantha Pruitt

Joined January 2008

  • Artist
    Notes
  • Artwork Comments 1

Artist's Description

I wrote this while i was on the phone talking to this guy i really liked who i thought liked me, while he’s asking me what he should do about this one girl that he really likes.

I was really depressed, as anyone would be, it seems a bit emo, but i think a lot of people have felt this way at one point or another.

i thought it was a good “in the moment” experience, since i wrote it in the moment.

P.S. i don’t usually write.

Artwork Comments

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