Butter

I sometimes wonder why people refridgerate their butter. there is little to no chance of you spreading refridgerated margerine on bread without “tearing” it. So what makes you think cold butter will do any better? The times i have had butter in my house it sits in the fridge forever, because when i take it out to use it, i find that it is completely useless.

Feeling as though i had had enough of this ‘spread conundrum’, i decided that i would be the smartest bastard in the world and buy one of them plastic butter containers.Because i thought everyone in the world was an idiot. “hah!” i said to myself." i’ll just keep this shit in the cupboard, where it will stay all melty and beautiful, for ALL ETERNITY.

So i headed to my local Coles supermarket, where i thought i could get a cheap butter container. “2 bucks max” i thought. “peice of piss. no problem.”

How fucken wrong i was. The butter containers where like 6 bucks for one that only holds half a wad of butter.im not paying 6 bucks! A lunchbox is bigger, and holds more butter- for 4 bucks! But i cant buy one of them. What will i do when dinner guests arrive? " G’day harry. Butter for the roast potato’s? It’s in that big fuck-off lunchbox.

So no buying of butter containers for me. no undermining of other butter consumers. I’ve given up on buying butter as well. I’ll just stick with crappy margerine.

And pray.Pray that the reject shop comes out with butter containers.( they probably do- i haven’t checked)

FIN

Butter

rowanpunk

Hoppers Crossing, Australia

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Artist's Description

a rant about the problems one faces when dealing with butter

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butter

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  • AngryGoldfish
  • rowanpunk
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