Rishani Sittampalam

Bamabalapitya, Sri Lanka

I write. This is what I do. I think in pictures which convert into words and I pick one by one out and thread them together…

Journal

Empty

I am empty, bereft of emotion, there is neither darkness nor light. This is limbo, a place of blindness while my eyes are wide open. An aimless, purposeless, life-less place where nothing would survive. Perhaps this is what it feels if, God exited? Has He disappeared? He stand far off perhaps, or has He turned away, or… left?

Rest In Him

Often times we pine for that which we will never find or get. We struggle to get our hands on what would not naturally come our way. i found this to be a weight. The want of it, weighs me down and if I allow it, it has the power to drag me down to the very bottom of the sea.…

We all have burdens which we carry around with us that has the power to completely snuff out our peace and joy that only Jesus can give – and this He gives with total abundance and freely. In Him there is no shadow or doubt of his perfect love for us, there is contentment if we remain here, and we know for certain we are loved. If I was secure in the love of my God, I think I would be content to bask here within the circumference of what He provides for me than pine for what I cannot have.

Jesus invites all of us who

What Of Those Who Trespass Against Us

Will I hold this unforgiveness to myself and never let it go?
Somedays I allow it to flit through my grip and there is release, temporary.
All is.
This life included yet,
I hold this to me
Allowing it to burn me up from within.
Is there not enough harm caused to cause self-harm, I question my own intent.
But you do not know what lies within
Where there has not been justice.
We who stand up for the voiceless know what it is to be silenced into submission by the hand of force, we know what it is to be shamed for no fault,…

Do I forgive you for the shame you have brought upon me?
Do I forgive you for stealing not only my innocence
But also stealing my dignity, the affections of those who loved me?
The love of my own family who stands against me for standing against you.
How can I forgive him

Without

Jagged rocks. Not smooth pebbles on a river bed,
But heavy, large and heavy rocks with sharp edges.…

Angry men.
Mobs.
Aggressive.
Irrational with irrational anger.
Biased and prejudiced.
Conceited.

We are but all irrational people when others commit ‘wrong’ that is against our convictions, while on the other hand, we would give ourselves a surplus amount of pardon and grace if we were the ones to commit the same sin.

Aren’t we guilty of being angry men and women, don’t we gather people to stand against and stir up strife amongst one another? Don’t we become aggressive with Irrational anger? And allow our biases to rise up? Aren’t we conceited in our viewpoint when we want to be right?

And who are these people we stand mock and condemn? Have they even met this Jesus who calls us to leave our

Pussyfooting Christians

When it comes to people, there will always be one too many times where we’ll find ourselves between a rock and a very hard place. It will keep resurfacing in all areas where there are people involved.…

If we are immature, our solutions will be very fickle and God does not expect us to be immature all the time. He expects us to grow up and take responsibility and be good stewards of people. He managed it quite well in his time. He knew the characters of all his disciples and He did not sweep issues under the carpet, though at times with Judas He knew who he was. It was not a matter of overlooking His faults, I think it may have been a matter of giving Judas the opportunity to make the right choices. Jesus on the other hand, had the knowledge of Judas’ character and yet He did not choose to

Of fiery furnaces

Daniel stood in that fiery furnace with his two friends. He did not know whether God would save. Most times we just do not know God’s intentions in our circumstances. He does not forewarn us about the whys and the hows. What does He expect though? Perhaps our explicit trust? Perhaps an attitude that does not break under pressure? Perhaps a knowledge that He would come through. But even Daniel said, even if He does not save, we will still trust in Him. In Habbakuk we hear the same strains, even if the fig tree does not blossom, we will still trust in Him.…

Does God promise us a trouble-free, comfortable journey towards that finish line? He does not. He does though promise us His Presence. He promises to be with us.

Daniel could have opted out of the furnace and bowed before Nebuchadnezzar’s

Open The Eyes

Those who persecute others are oblivious that the transformation takes place within. The giving up of one creed in exchange for a Relationship with the King of the cosmos and the entire universe, is a private exchange between God and your inner man. Actual conversion cannot be bought for a loaf of bread or a packet of milk. Look at Saul – the murderer, even more murderous than the persecutors of past histories put together. He burnt down churches, he killed the followers of Christ. He went after Christians with the aim of reducing Christianity to nothing. But one day, on the road to Damascus, Saul met the Living One. His eyes were opened. Instantaneously. Like Saul some of us who have known the Living One, persecute our own selves, live a deprecating life, live caged and bound by our own…

Overrated?

A friend recently said, Christianity is overrated. I understand what she meant clearly today. Not that Christianity is overrated. I understand why she thinks Christianity is. I think Christianity is what it is but there is this constant battle to stay within its boundaries. Sometimes, it is the hardest battle of all to say no to what your heart wants and yes to what is ‘Christian’ and ‘Biblical’ when there is so much warring inside. But God doesn’t give us stones we ask for bread and He has meant the boundaries for good. My good. There’s no one unfaithful to God than I am and yet this amazing God still remains faithful to a jackass like me. Is Christianity overrated? I don’t think so. I don’t get what I want. But if I remain in Him, I will get what I need.

Anyway

He questions me… like I am a five year old child who’s walked off with some stranger. He yells at me when I clown around and says ‘act your age’, when I act my age and retort; he frowns, and says ’don’t be cheeky’. Sometimes there is just no getting a word in either way. I frown in return and give him the cold shoulder until some part of him, I know… melts. Even though he looks tough on the outside – I know when I am down, he feels it too.…

Even in the middle of the night, he calls to know if I have eaten. Even when I am miles away from him, he still wants to know whether I am alright, whether I have enough money in my pocket, whether I am well fed, whether I have a roof over my head.

He lectures me all the way, wherever I go with him, if I orbit around the sun, all I will hear would be h

The Call

In the darkness before first light
she stirs,
awakened by the sounds of ethereal music…
and her name carried on tangles of wind
gently stirring through the leaves outside her window…
“wake… up.. child…” the wind whispers and beckons her from her deep sleep.
From semi conscious dreams she surges upward through the vortex of colour,
And ascends from her dreams to the voice of her Father calling her name
alluring her to His Presence.

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