Torn Apart

The smile I wear is but a disguise.
I am alone, and no one knows
that I hurt, so very bad.

Emptiness has built a home in this heart.
It has made an awful wreckage of my life.
It feeds on loneliness and creates a void.
Gray shadows haunt, torment and torture.
Confusion feeds like a savage beast inside of me,
leaving nothing considered worthy remains.

Am I destined to walk through life less ordinary,
alone, exiled, different and disdained?
You see the hope that I once had is finally dead.
The sad part is no one saw me die inside.

I cannot trust because my heart has been bled.
My heart is empty, my soul has been torn apart.
I no longer want to think or feel.
A deepening sorrow and grief consumes
and eats away at every connecting thread.

I would shout and cry, but I know
there is no one that will hear me.
So my pain remains, continues and lasts.

I have loved, lost and lived.
I’m sick of all the fights, the revenge and lies.
I feel like there is nothing more I can give.

Do you see the pain that lies in my eyes?
How do I trust, how do I love again with this rage?
Can I leave my sadness and pain behind?
Or will I always be alone wondering
if my life will ever again be complete?

Somber, melancholy moods decay my soul
It is futile to hope and dream and pray.
But through all the sadness there is
something that keeps me holding on -
What that is I may never know.

Maybe there will come a day,
when all the pain will finally die.
I will feel strong with a heart reborn,
and a new love I will finally try.
What a splendid day that will be.
When I have awaken to discover,
I’m happily living a great new life,
with a wonderful new friend and lover.

Maybe there is still some small part of me
that believes things will go my way
and my heart and my soul may some day be right.
But with all this said…
My heart and my soul are still lonely tonight!

Torn Apart

Ellen  Price - Greenwald

Gilbert, United States

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