Happy

I still don’t know how you do it.
Make me smile when i’m so determined to pout.
Make me dance when i’m so determined to hide in the corner.
Make me laugh when i’m so determined to cry.

I was sad for a very long time.
It was a winter that lasted years.
The frigid weather kept my heart frozen;
Dead.

But then you came.
And wormed your way through.
I thought it was all too much,
But i couldnt stay away from you.

I had been cold for so long
The warmth you brought was a scary thought.
I panicked.
Pushed you away to hide me tears and my fears.
But you stuck through.
And i’m so happy you did.
Cause i found myself missing you.
Wondering about you.
Praying for you.
Yerning for you.

Those days we didn’t talk killed me.
Slowly.
I cried every night.
Wondering.
Is he ok?
Does he hate me?
Does he miss me like i miss him?
When will i see him next?
Hear his voice?
See his smile?

It drove me mad.
I couldnt sleep.
Hardly ate.

Do remember what you told me when we first talked after that week of nothing?
My worst fear almost came to life.
You said that we couldnt even stay friends.
That shattered me.
I recoiled into an old defense tactic and didn’t show you the tears that were screaming to be released.
But i fought.
Hard.

When i thought i was going to lose you for good a fear i’ve never know gripped me.
And i didn’t realize it then,
But i needed you.
I still do.

So i worked hard.
To make it up to you.
So i could earn the right to have another chance.
To show you that it was all real.
That i did love you.

That i do love you.

You have a hold over me,
Did you know?
I can’t resist you.
Can’t stay away.
A very bold facade i show, but underneath, you have me melting like the finest chocolate.

Ask and you shall recieve, luv.
Because i’m happy with you.
Truely happy.
And i will spend as long as you will allow me to make sure that every moment you spend with me is as happy as you make me.

Happy

rayy

Joined March 2008

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  • rayy
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