The giant saw it squirming on his plate, he wasn’t really very hungry and it didn’t look very appealing. He usually liked to eat them alive, but he wondered whether he should put this critter out of its misery first. It crawled off his plate and made a little …jump for the edge of the table. He picked it up and put it back on the plate. He thought about putting it into the skillet for a few seconds, just for a quick sauté, he thought that might make it taste a little better. Adding some spices, a little pepper and some onion always added flavor. He didn’t know any kind of dessert that was actually a good accompaniment to it, well maybe a quickie toasted pop tart, however he knew it went really well with cheap strawberry Boones Ferry Farm WHINE. Something about the two of these together just complimented each other. Leeks were usually the best veggie with it. But tonight he was tired and didn’t feel like any of these extras, after all it had taken a long time to catch the damn thing. It had put up a real good fight, right to the end. And the squealing, OH GOODNESS!!! It was the noisiest one he had ever caught. He had eaten many of them before. Sometimes he just stabbed them on the plate with his fork until they stopped squirming and then just popped them in his mouth. Sometimes he enjoyed watching them squirm depending on his mood. This one was still putting up quite a fight. He thought about putting it on the floor and feeding it to his dogs. And then going out and getting something that would be more satisfying, like a big juicy steak with some A-1 sauce. After all who needed this, to battle some ugly little critter to the very end that would be all tough, chewy, and hard to digest. It had slipped off his plate again and had picked up the salt and pepper shakers. It threw them at him, one after another quickly, hitting him square in the brow. And when he picked it up, it pinched his fingers. This really made him mad!!! He ripped off its arm and popped it in his mouth and started to munch. It squealed. Eee!!! Eee!!! Eee!!! He smiled rather wickedly, feeling a little irritated and very justified. Then he ripped the other arm off and ate that one too. It still had legs so it ran across the table. He circled the table quickly and picked it up, turned it upside down and, (yum), bit off its legs. The thrill of victory. Crunch…crunch…crunch. It squealed, eee!!! Eee!!! Eee!!! He decided he didn’t want the rest, mostly out of spite, so he tossed it with a little force into his dogs’ plates. They ate it in one second flat, all of them, ripping it into little pieces. It had been kind of disappointing, not like he had expected at all. And he had been so hungry, so he decided to sate his still ravenous appetite by a quick stop off at the convenience store down the block to pick up some candy. Maybe some more pop tarts, and he thought maybe some Hershey’s chocolate candy bars would make him feel good and lift his spirits, especially after a really bad meal. He liked the really cheap chocolate syrup topping the best with rocky road ice cream. Ah yes, maybe some Ho Hos and some Twinkies too. Nothing like a cheap dessert to top of a stringy, unflavorful, bland meal that had squealed too much. Eee!!! Eee!!! Eee!!! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!



Outcast & Exiled Often From The..., United States

  • Artist

Artist's Description

This is a short little story that is meant to be analogous to how some love attractions and relationships are. The critter is a wild and untamed woman, and the Giant is a man. The foods and spices are meant to add flavor to the imagination of the story. Eee!!! Eee!!! Eee!!!

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