She' Gone

In wanting to be special, this girl somehow found her way to a lonely world.
More like a hole. It would seem to me that she is stuck. It is because i lnow her that i see she is held there against her will. She runs through relationships like sox. I see her sadness when she smiles at me. I see right though her untrusting eyes. Shes looking for that reason. Just one reason before she runs. The one reason that she needs to excuse herself from this relationship without holding the bame. Without getting hurt, without hurting someone else, without letting me too close so she thinks i cant see who she is. I think it’s the only way she can feel safe. But i can see her fire burning intensly when she walks into a room, knowing that all eyes are on her. She knows she is special in that moment. But only surrounded by people that dont know her at all. she feels secure that no one can say for sure anything at all about her. so she feels special, because no one knows her. Deep inside she is crying for a savior. On the outside she wears her armor. In all this time that she’s been alone she’s settled in unknowingly to this hole. Her pains she keeps secret and she tells no one of her joys. She is misterious even to herself. All this time she has done what her impulses tell her. No one to stop her. In doing whatever she wants at any piont in time she’s built herself a secret life. She follows the instant happiness from one moment to the next. No one knows what she does late at night when she gets lonely. She answers to no one. No one checks up on her. With the exception of me right now but I dont have any right to question her whereabouts at 3:am or her reasons for never being home at that time. I guess i’m just waiting for my time to run out, waiting for her to run out. She is so secure with her self when she has everyone in her life at a distance. She doesn’t realize what she is doing. She runs when people get too close and when she feels more then she thinks she should. She wont let herself be admired unless its from afar. One lie, one mistake. No it doesnt take any more then that . . . She’s gone. But I know shes lonely in the hole that she has spent years digging. I know this because I can see she’s happy when she laughing with people around. I see how she excepts people for the humans that they are. As long as there’s no threat she’s happy with people around.

She' Gone

mytime2shyne

Baltimore, United States

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