Waves Of Consciousness

I ask the stars and wonder:
Am I doomed to fail?
What am I doing and who am I?

I row my boat to shore and step out onto land, stretching my arms towards the sky.
I walk on the beach and the sand that is usually comforting under my feet is heavy.
I try to skip a stone and it falters and sinks into blue.
I pick up my feet step after step and the sand between my toes feel coarse.
The waves crash onto the earth and I dare not look at them for I fear they will suck me in.
The gulls fly above me and caw with the sound of desperation.
They circle the beach like the vultures who circle the dying panther in the jungles of deep.
The stars shine down but aren’t giving off any light they look cold and hollow.

I walk towards a lighthouse I take the steps two at a time hoping to find comfort high above the sand.
I see that the light that is supposed to keep people safe its shattered, broken, into tiny pieces.
A man with a sailors hat comes up the steps, his face is weathered with age and salts of the sea.
He points out towards the ocean and I see a figure on water not a boat or a buoy but a man.
The man is old but stands with the confidence of a lord or an emperor. He is regal in every aspect; the way his green eyes twinkle with sorrow and joy all at once.
His short beard makes his face unwelcoming but trustworthy.
Up from the water shoots a silver trident and a throne made of pearl .
I then understand that this is the Great Poseidon, King of the Seas.
He nods his head crowned with coral and seaweed towards me and I stand on the lighthouse railing and yell my questions pleading with him to answer.
The wind is so strong, the tide is so high and the gulls no longer fly.
My thoughts run wild just like the approaching storm:
I’m afraid he can’t hear me.
Will I ever be able to hear him over the sound of the lighting strikes and the thunder that starts to rumble?

But he answers my questions….

As I go to ask the most important one the light from the light house turns on illuminating everything and startles me.
I turn around and the man in the sailor hat just smirks at me.
Looking back out to sea I only see my shadow cast out from the light, what a lonely sight that is a man’s shadow.
I whisper a thank you anyways to the great king and stare into the briny deep.

I walk down the steps and back onto the sand wet, soggy now, from the tide that just came in
I see a woman with dark hair and I look at her and we start to walk together.
I start to tell her the trials of my life and she listens nodding as the wind sweeps through her hair.
I finally run out of words and look into her gray-blue eyes.
She starts to move her hands rapidly, rhythmically, like shes telling a story.
I realize that the woman is deaf.
She has heard nothing I said.
And I can not understand her.
At a loss, I nod goodbye and hope for her safety.

I walk back to my boat.
It is almost daylight now and I look up at the sky once more and ask:
Am I doomed to fail?
What am I doing and who am I?

I stare out into the ocean and the rising sun.
The sky is pink around the edges.
As I get the oars ready over the breeze I hear a voice, its the man who replaced the bulb in the lighthouse still wearing that crooked smile he says:
“Pink in the morning, sailors take warning”
I push my boat out into the water and row out into the sun, heeding no ones warning but my own.

Waves Of Consciousness


Ray, United States

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