RuLe #1...Parents should be seen not heard!!

Marny Barnes

Beausejour, Canada

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You just know that Mama & Papa Syni’ster are going to make me pay for the humiliation they suffered at my hands placing that electrical tape over their mouths. I kept trying to tell them that being this close to their corpse like breath was NOT my idea of a dreamy day. Mama snarled and growled like a cornered cat. (I know you have heard this sound….the guttural, low in the throat growl a cat gives when they are about to go postal on your ass) She actually tried to bite me; until Casey sprang into action and thunked her on the back of the noggin with the blunt side of that hatchet. (If looks could kill, I am telling you I would be six feet under and rotting)

Katey held her meat cleaver up against Papa’s throat as I was WAY to freaking, crap scared to get too close to him. I have no doubt in my mind she would have cut his throat in an instant. And messy it would have been, seeing as that blade is about as sharp as a butter knife.

I couldn’t quite figure out what all this was about (in regards to the rules) until Katey pointed out that it was time for me to play 20 questions. One question for each toe and finger. Either I got it right or lost one of my digits!!!

“Guess the rule!” she says.

I felt the sweat bead on my back and drip down my shoulder blades. I LIKE my fingers….AND my toes even if they ARE stubby!! I couldn’t imagine my life without them. I think I started to hyper-ventilate…and the picture in front of me started to slide sideways. CRAP CRAP CRAP…what was this rule she was trying to exhibit here…..

DAMMIT…I’ve got it!!!
“Parent’s should be seen and not heard!” I blurted out.

I knew I had to choose my words carefully. It was becoming painfully obvious with every passing second that those parents were completely at the mercy of those “THINGS” I loosely term as humans, so I am pretty sure they would not be trying to save me. I almost had blurted out “Children should be seen and not heard!”

This would have been a grave error on my part. (Yup…a shallow GRAVE for my itty-bitty pinky)

Both monster spawn looked terribly disappointed that I had gotten the wording right. I know how close I came to loosing a digit that I cherish so dearly. Now the sweat was dripping down my forehead. How the HELL do I get myself into these situations!! PLEASE god I SWEAR I will never SWEAR again if you let me live through this. (Any one who knows me knows I have a terrible, rotten potty mouth!!)

In the same token, I was carrying a somewhat smug grin on my face having outwitted the two of them.

“PERFECT” Casey said! “I like this next rule better anyways!!!”
I quickly lost the smug smile I was sporting. It couldn’t POSSIBLY be a good thing if Casey was happy. The sweat was beading again…..OH MAN!!!! Seriously, how do I get myself into this garbage.

On a different note (Back to me again) there was no one there last night when I answered the door. Must have been the wrong address. I could have sworn I heard the phone ringing, but I know it’s not possible, it’s still in the garbage. So I put a pillow over my head and refused to believe I could hear it.

(NOPE….couldn’t hear a thing!)

So I have decided that you all are going to have to wait for another RULE Picture. I have decided it is high time we introduce Mama & Papa Syni’ster more formally. I know, I know. You are dying to see the next rule. BUT I figure if I have to suffer. Then SO DO YOU!!


Artwork Comments

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