Nostalgic Moment

I remember one time a friend of mine had wanted to stop by the campus to get some letters from his professors and he had nowhere to sleep so I had allowed him to spend a couple of days in my room because he is a really cool guy and always starts some interesting and stimulating conversations.

But after week two of him living in my room I began to realize that maybe conversation isn’t going to make this “short visit” worthwhile anymore. My other friends would see him around the campus and look at me wide-eyed with that clear question running around in their head,

what the hell is he still doing here?

And I would softly try to explain that I can’t just kick someone out. Besides, no one else would take him. And that would still them for a while. But then more insidious questions would arise at the back of their eyes and strangely it furiated me.

are you sleeping with him?

No. I’m not.

But I realized just how much words can taint a person’s character and I didn’t want the effects of gossip to influence the way I lived. By week three he had finally left. It was a simple goodbye, complete with a hug and a relieved look from one of my best friends.

I always remembered the silence in my room afterwards. How beautiful it sounded to me. It’s hard for me to be around people all the time. I try but eventually it wears me out, and I need time for myself. I felt strangely caged with my friend staying in my room and I hadn’t realized just how closed in one could feel in their own residence.

Now at home, the bars are before my eyes even thicker than before. It just makes me think about that time and wonder when this period of containment will end.

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