I dont want you to go, wake up im already gone

ive found this place in my mind, I keep his picture there
each time he touches me now i fall deeper into that same place
its dark and cold, and yet it feels like home.
Im try to be brave but everytime the tears just seem to come, they no longer fall but crash around me, each one of them a pure silver bullet there to remind me that tomorrow will still come no matter how much i want it not to ..
its a feeling like no other when you realize that there is nothing more you can do to salvage the lies, emptiness is all that is left for your wicked soul.
I have come to the brutal realization that no narcotic or substance will subdue the terrible longing i have for him. I found myself in his arms again and i felt him hold me back so tightly it suffocated all the pain, but once again morning came and again all hope dissapeared. how does one justify this, probably with a lame " you will find something better" but the catch 22 situation i now find myself in is that I DONT WANT anything better. I want this darkness that only he can provide in my soul. I want his evil smile in my life. This heart now blackend beyond any reconcilliation a demon of the night i have become and darkness as a pet suffices …
I still hold your picture in a little room in my heart, all else has been destroyed.
you still hold my tears in the palm of your hand, all else has been destroyed .

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