Young Love

Don’t forget to come say good night to me!” he called after me as I led my horse out in to the paddock for the night. It was the night before my pony club’s one-day event and I was stay the night out at the farm because of the 5am start the next morning. There were 8 other girls staying the night as well, but he chose me.
I climbed the narrow stairs to where he lived with his wife and 2 children. Taryn, his wife and his oldest daughter had gone to port fairy for the weekend. Maddy, his youngest daughter was still out with her horse. He was sitting on a large blue couch reading the latest issue of the reader’s digest. He heard me come up the stairs and glanced up over his book and smiled at me.
“I came to say good night” I smiled back and took a seat next to him.
“You’re all set for tomorrow?”
“Yup, hopefully Eclipse won’t roll in the mud tonight, it took me so long to get him clean”
“Ha, I hope so too.” Surveillance
“I missed you at church this morning”
“Oh, yeah, I was helping Taryn pack the car. She’s gone to Port Fairy for the long weekend, she wanted to get away yesterday morning but she didn’t want to drive in the weather.”
“So it’s just you and Maddy then?”
“Yup, where is Maddy?”
“Still braiding Magic’s mane the last time I saw her.”
Already sitting close to me, he leaned in closer. He gently placed his hand on my right knee, we both looked at his hand for a moment, while silently I questioned what it meant and he considered what to do next. His eyes titled up and met mine again. Alice stared back without expression. He moved his hand further up my thigh slightly, and then lifted it to my right breast. He paused, holding me in his hand.
“If you tell any one about this I loose my job.” He reasoned.
I lurched away and stood up, he stood and grabbed my wrist, I flinched, and he moved in close to me again.
“If you tell any one about this, I’ll lose my job.” He pleaded.
He released my wrist. I turned back to the stairs, I didn’t run, I walked away from him back down the stairs to where the other girls were. I sat down on my bed; I sat there quietly for a while, not saying anything. In the midst of the other girls’ excitement about the next day, I began to cry and I cried hard. The room fell silent and all the girls stopped what they were doing to look at me. A tall blonde girl sat next to me, I don’t remember her name.
“What’s wrong?” she asked.
“He,” I gasped and choked out, “he, touched me…”
She stared at me, her eyes narrowed and her left eyebrow raised slightly “What?”
“He touched me!” I screamed.

This doesn’t happen to me, this happens to other people and I read it about it later in the news. Reality threatens and all of a sudden this spectacle is real. The rich green hills and the sweet smell of horses have been washed away. I could smell petrol from the petrol station about a kilometer down the road; I’d never smelt it here before. This place was no longer pure; a sea of change had been unleashed. At the time I couldn’t even imagine where this going spiral into next, I told some one about it and he lost his job. Somehow it ended up moving in a full circle, I kept my horse on the farm for a few years after, so did my friends, parents continued to send their children to the camps held there and we all remember what happened obliquely.

“Why didn’t you leave him?” Maddy asked her mother over the TV.
Taryn, still half asleep “Huh?”
“Why didn’t you leave Dad?”
Taryn didn’t answer. The TV continued to blare from the screen but the tension between them was not unnoticed. Maddy sat staring at the television, not watching it, until finally Taryn answered.
“I couldn’t.”
“Why?”
“Because I still love him.”
“He doesn’t love you.”
“Yes he does.”
“You don’t really believe that.”
“Yes I do Maddy. This is just the way things happen, you don’t just give up everything you have with some one just because they made a mistake.”
Maddy said nothing for moment, still staring at the television
“You make it sound like he forgot to feed the cat.”

Journal Comments

  • AmandaWitt
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