rabbitollah exclusive *mister khan tries sport writing*

i’m afraid if you put a team of whities up against a team of brownies, this sort of thing is absolutely natural.

international cricket should be done like it is in the playground, which is of course, from where it originated in the first place- pool the best players, pick a bunch of captains, and then let the captains pick their teams. i believe that’s what is about to happen in india, and if it does then it is very positive in the fourth eye of hoff. and it’s a fucking scandal that the english board are not going to allow the best 11 in england to take part in what they know is going to be the start of what could reignite the game of cricket which has become an archaic merry-go-round of predictable australian victories, thinly veiled racism, and domestic competitons which when compared to their soccer equivilent in england, contrast like the two halves of a cricket ball wasim akram’s just had by himself in a dark alleyway for 90 seconds. . Isn’t that suprising when one considers that the English Cricket is controlled by a collective, collectively more conservatively constricted in their foresight than dennis thatcher in his gimp mask.

I believe the european champion’s league in football will evolve into a full-scale european-wide league, furnished with the best european players, fed from domestic leagues. The teams already exist, the money exists, and the infrstructures exist, and soon the demand will exist, if it doesn’t already- from t.v. fans, live fans board rooms, and the players themselves. Only conservative forces are inhibiting it’s realisation, for they have interests, financial and sentimental, to protect. An analagous development is certain for world cricket, which is restricted to a small number of top international teams spread accross the globe. When the top players are concentrated together in the same league, the revenune and interest naturally rockets. The current system of english summers and australian winters geographically isolates the biggest suource of revenue and fan interest in the world. Asia. That’s the difference. Like brazil loses its best players to european leagues, i believe the white cricketing world is going to lose it’s best to the leagues in the browner part of the world. and the mcc is not going to let that happen without a few stomach ulcers and possibly a stroke on its’ part, and as much destructive resistance as it’s artritic hips can muster.

I think the indian experiment is something that will develop into a new league- based in asia. A host of asian locations the the 4 major countries, plus sharjah and dubai. good living in the gulf states. popstar fame and fortune. try telling kevin pietersen ‘no’. The money is just to big to ignore, and headingly on a wet Wednesday with yorkshire vs. Lincolnshire afternoon doesn’t shift, say, 250,000 tickets, 100,000 samosas and half a million cups of chai, as it might in bombay, if Tendulkar was batting. For lincolnshire. Three years short of his 50th birthday. David Gower could still sell out a stadium if he wanted to play there. He’s got an enormous fan base. They think he’s like the queen and princess diana rolled into one.

They say they are kicking racism out of football, but they lie. Premier League Football is kicking racism out of its fans. How many 16 year old arsenal fans think thierry henry is ‘a coon’, or ‘a nigger’? Less than the number he wears on his back. Cricket can follow it’s lead.

Let the roof of perpetual international cricket drawn along national lines collapse upon the racism that it incubates in fans and players alike.

Cricket for peace.

And it all started with colourful pajamas.

rabbitollah exclusive *mister khan tries sport writing*

mister  khan

Best in the World, Russian Federation

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Artist's Description

prompted by the following dialogue

x-Where did you get this ‘confidence’ from in the first place?

y-the confidence comes from those special religious incense sticks that he burns constantly….

z-.they’d be the same ones the indian cricket team is burning before they go out to bat.

y- well they need something to deal with the revolting name calling that the Australian team seems to think is mandatory…


khan mister

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