There is no soap

Can you hear my heart? Can you see my soul?
I am so empty so abandoned so alone.
There is no soap that can wash away this pain.
Is my life in vain?

I want to go home, please take me home.
The night has gobbled my days.
You said no more than I can bear; yet time and time again they die

I say no lie, Please let my soul soar, take me home.
He once again invades my dreams, I thought I released his soul
but he is still tied, I see him in the mirror, I feel him in the bath,
I hear his last words now they call to me pull the trigger
and come home with me.

With his blood on my feet and a piece of his brain on the floor,
I tried to piece together. Where was his eye in the toilet why?
His teeth only to find later to late imbedded in the bathroom wall.

His still body just sat there as I patted his knee
I said I could fix but I could not. There is no soap
that could wash away the blood or the pain.
His last words “Andrea I love you” I thought would carry me through.
But there is no soap [that can wash away
The night still gobbles my day.

Can you hear my heart? Can you hear my soul?
The void left inside just won’t fill.
You sent my soul sister and His long ago brother
She and He are still here
Yet I feel so abandoned so alone please call me home.

I still feel the warmth the sticky of your life’s blood
we have been through things.
why did you leave me to this alone?

Now your ash sits in brick, I need to go to the mountain top
leaving my body chronic I want my ash
To soar in the wind with my teardrop.

If I caught a star would you catch it?
Would you know I’m here? Could you know?
Could you adhere.

No longer does my life have worth!
I cannot seem to rebirth. There is no soap
that can wash away this pain
for life is now so mundane.

I no longer want to go forward I want to come home.
I feel so alone. This empty space inside
fills and drains then leaves only more human stain.

Can you hear my heart? Can you hear my soul?
I am becoming black as coal.
I can not find the light not even a pinhole.

Is there no boundary strong enough to stop this circle?
Will it be broken ? Each thought is held in the grasp of time.
Then you’re there walking in my dreams
and my night gobbles my day;
there is no soap that can wash this pain away.

I am alone can you hear my heart?
Can you hear my soul? Please call me home.

Ed I love you
Andrea

There is no soap

Andrea Bailey

Roswell, United States

  • Artist
    Notes
  • Artwork Comments 2

Artist's Description

I hope it helps someone to know they are not the only one write it it helps.
My Husband commited suicide in July a very violent death one can never understand. I will still try.

Tags

death life

Artwork Comments

  • krafty
  • Andrea Bailey
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