Crushed Independence

I would like, in the five to ten minutes it takes you to read and analyze this proposal, to bring to your attention the social issue of racism and my solution as to how we may end such a ridiculous and easily avoidable catastrophe, and thus (to my greatest hope) end all possible deaths and witticism made at one another’s expense.

As an introduction I would like to first take the time to explain to you, dear reader, that racism is not limited to the colour of one’s skin, but is the victim of a broader subject which involves, and is not limited to, one’s culture, or way of life if you will. With that festering delicately in your mind I present to you what I hope to be a simple and easily accomplished proposal. To begin this proposal, I believe it necessary start at, well… the beginning.

When a child is born the colour of the skin first makes itself known, the perfect opportunity to tackle the issue before it is exposed to the community. As a solution to this issue, I propose that at birth the child, whether male or female, be immediately placed into a neutral liquid dye, the colour most probably being gray so as to eliminate the `black/white’ issue in its entirety.

It has been recently brought to my attention the possibility of the dye wearing off the skin, as dyes so often do, and after careful consideration and many sleepless nights, an idea arose like a fresh spring flower. Every Sunday, the day of our Lord, men, women, and children will be required to partake in a ceremony which will involve soaking in a pool of the afore mentioned gray dye. We will soak for four to nine hours, or until the dye is thoroughly soaked into the skin, a Baptism if you will. This way the skin will always remain the neutral colour without worry of wearing. Refusal to partake in this ceremony will result in incarceration or possible death, depending wholly upon which state you live in.

As for the obstacle of dying the head, which to my great dismay harbors all the instruments needed for breathing, and thus cannot be placed under any liquid for an extreme amount of time, the solution would be simply to issue every man, woman, and child a black felt bag. This felt bag is to be placed over one’s head, thus not only hiding the colour of the un-dyed skin, but also limits any individuality in the features of a particular face.

Also, in addition to the felt bag, I believe it necessary for every individual to be required to wear a white jumpsuit. The advantages of said action should be considered: such as the limited individuality and as a result limited ways for a person to be mocked or bullied and also limited colour which again helps to reduce mocking. This jumpsuit may also serve to hide an individual’s body shape which I understand to be a major source of ridicule.

In the end, I express the highest hope that you, the fine people of America, will consider this proposal and take it to heart. I hope that you will think less of yourselves and more of those around you, whether they be your children or a stranger, when reading this proposal. I urge you, please, think of the benefits a racism free world can bring to the future generations to come and how many potential dangers may be avoided if we, as a united nation, take action now while there is still time for action to be taken. Thank you my fellow Americans and comrades for reading this proposal and I hope to see you clearly in a near future where the fog of racism is finally lifted and we will all live united.

Crushed Independence


Magnolia, United States

  • Artist

Artist's Description

This is something I wrote a long time ago… It’s not in anyway meant to be taken seriously, in fact, just the opposite. This piece was written to point out the ridiculousness of racism and bullying. It’s completely satire and something I wrote for the hell of it. That being said: Here ya go!

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