The giant saw it squirming on his plate, he wasn’t really
very hungry and it didn’t look very appealing. He usually
liked to eat them alive, but he wondered whether he
should put this critter out of its misery first. It crawled
off his plate and made a little …jump for the edge of the
table. He picked it up and put it back on the plate. He
thought about putting it into the skillet for a few seconds,
just for a quick sauté, he thought that might make it taste
a little better. Adding some spices, a little pepper and
some onion always added flavor. He didn’t know any
kind of dessert that was actually a good accompaniment
to it, well maybe a quickie toasted pop tart, however he
knew it went really well with cheap strawberry Boones
Ferry Farm WHINE. Something about the two of these
together just complimented each other. Leeks were
usually the best veggie with it. But tonight he was tired
and didn’t feel like any of these extras, after all it had
taken a long time to catch the damn thing. It had put up
a real good fight, right to the end. And the squealing,
OH GOD!!! It was the noisiest one he had ever caught.
He had eaten many of them before. Sometimes he just
stabbed them on the plate with his fork until they stopped
squirming and then just popped them in his mouth.
Sometimes he enjoyed watching them squirm depending
on his mood. This one was still putting up quite a fight.
He thought about putting it on the floor and feeding it to
his dogs. And then going out and getting something that
would be more satisfying, like a big juicy steak with some
A-1 sauce. After all who needed this, to battle some ugly
little critter to the very end that would be all tough, chewy,
and hard to digest. It had slipped off his plate again and
had picked up the salt and pepper shakers. It threw them
at him, one after another quickly, hitting him square in the
brow. And when he picked it up, it pinched his fingers.
This really pissed him off! He ripped off its arm and
popped it in his mouth and started to munch. It squealed.
Eee!!! Eee!!! Eee!!! He smiled rather wickedly, feeling
a little irritated and very justified. Then he ripped the other
arm off and ate that one too. It still had legs so it ran across
the table. He circled the table quickly and picked it up,
turned it upside down and, (yum), bit off its legs. The thrill
of victory. Crunch…crunch…crunch. It squealed, eee!!!
Eee!!! Eee!!! He decided he didn’t want the rest, mostly
out of spite, so he tossed it with a little force into his dogs’
plates. They ate it in one second flat, all of them, ripping it
into little pieces. It had been kind of disappointing, not like
he had expected at all. And he had been so hungry, so he
decided to sate his still ravenous appetite by a quick stop
off at the convenience store down the block to pick up
some candy. Maybe some more pop tarts, and he thought
maybe some Hershey’s chocolate candy bars would make
him feel good and lift his spirits, especially after a really bad
meal. He liked the really cheap chocolate syrup topping the
best with rocky road ice cream. Ah yes, maybe some Ho Hos
and some Twinkies too. Nothing like a cheap dessert to
top of a stringy, unflavorful, bland meal that had squealed
too much. Eee!!! Eee!!! Eee!!! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!


Copyright ©2008 JANE Á PARIS



Joined February 2008

  • Artist
  • Artwork Comments 6

Artist's Description

This is a short little story that is meant to be analogous to how some love attractions and relationships are. The critter is a wild and untamed woman, and the Giant is a man. The foods and spices are meant to add flavor to the imagination of the story. Eee!!! Eee!!! Eee!!!

Artwork Comments

  • DeEtta Brown
  • Damian
  • JaneAParis
  • butchart
  • JaneAParis
  • butchart
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