Joined February 2008

I have a deep love for expressionism – ‘Expressionistic artist sought to develop pictorial forms which would express their innermost...


“I wish I could do something for you.
Hugs from your friend Aurora’’
I appreciate your friendship and understanding Aurora
No one in my country will stand up for me
I have had to battle this for years
I can’t even get the church to protect me
My ex-husband, the doctor, the police and others sexually assaulted me
When I had my baby, and they left an infection in my body on purpose
They have tortured for years, and they continue to torture me
They think it is funny
They have destroyed everything in my life
I think they are dirty, filthy bullies
They deny me medicine and they lie about it
They try to get me to sleep with men, because that is the only solution
They will provide
They are completely capable of healing me
But they refuse, they have kept me in this physical hell and toyed with me
For twelve years
Of course I want to have a relationship with a man
This is normal, but I am not a building to be finished
I am a human being that needs health care and I shouldn’t have to sleep
With a man for this, it is extremely disrespectful just like all the other dirty
Disrespectful things they do to me
Medicine is a human right
They won’t let me be empowered and they lie about it
So of course again the only empowerment I am allowed is through a man
They deny me decent, fair employment
WIthout harassment and abuse
They steal my money and resources
I have had to buy things over and over again
Because they break them and steal them
I have no security, so the very few things I do have
Are always in jeopardy, I have no power to really have
Any stability, or any self worth in life
I am denied
Every time I try to build something
They destroy it
They think it is alright to do anything to me
They even break the law, they have no regard for the rules or my personal boundaries
They think it is funny to make me suffer
They have stolen from me, they have assaulted me
They constantly disrespect me, emotionally abuse me, and mentally abuse me
They had GPS on my car
They listen to my phone calls and they read my mail
They financially abuse me
They don’t respect my right to own property or have valuables
I actually still own half of our house, from when I was married
But it does not matter, because I am treated like a non-person
And no one has any respect for the law and what I own, even if it is on paper
Because according to them I am a person with no rights
And according to them my sentence is forever
They tell me all the time that I am “nothing” and that I deserve
What they are doing to me
They don’t let me see my own children
They lie to my children
They constantly harass me
I live my life in constant fear for I have no security and I do not trust people who
Think that I have no rights, and think that it is okay to do what they want to me
And lie about it
I don’t want to live here anymore even though it is my homeland
To me it is not a home
I have had to deal with never-ending hatred and abuse for years and years
And now I have nothing and I am sick
They set me up for this and rode me until the destruction of everything in my life
Was the ultimate conclusion
And still they won’t stop
There are many of them that even still want my life
They say things like “why don’t you commit suicide”
This is what they want, they are truly evil predators
They keep me caged and they lie about it
And they constantly try to make me feel small and powerless
I have been made to pay over and over again for my country’s bad politics
And bad war
I am not responsible for either
I have no idea what to do with myself right now Aurora
Because my problems never end here
I am never truly free here
I am sick and they won’t give me medical care
And I don’t believe that they will ever empower me in the work market either
I tried so hard to do the right thing Aurora
But I am always in the position of having no power
Even in a foreign country I am an outsider, and the same people prey
On me about politics saying that I have no rights
I have no rights anywhere
And as long as I am a floormat
Everyone in my personal life is a floormat too
Especially my children
I am very unhappy with my homeland
There is no reason in the world to persecute and abuse another human being
Until you destroy everyting in their life
And hurt innocent children in the process
I find these people to be reprehensible bullies
I should be able to love anyone I want just like everyone else
They have no right to keep me in a never-ending cage and kill me
But that is exactly what they are doing

Journal Comments

  • Alan Findlater
  • JaneAParis
  • Alan Findlater
  • JaneAParis