Like a wolf shows their teeth...

start time 6:47

Yesterday…gahh yesterday. Im thinking while I squeeze this silly putty…
That yesterday was only me, definatly not your fault or anybodys.
Was the second time I had an IV in my arm due to to fucking stress.
Just because my motto is taken advantage of, nothing more, nothing less.

“I live to serve” makes anyone a good person.
But the motto carrier is the only person to worsten.
Me and my mother get shit on by freinds and family, and all we do is cry “Why”
Why do freinds and family hurt us just to protect somthing stupid, or a lie?

Drinking this beer, I give a grunt of disgust…
Why until now, people just can’t give me their trust?
Latley the right hemisphere of my brain is signaling lust.
Feels like my motto I lived by is being crushed to dust.

Feels great having given over a thousand dollars all-together to the friends and the poor.
But absolutley nothing can pay for when I saw my grandfathers tear hit the floor.
I always wondered what caused people to up and blow.
Why do they bottle shit up, instead of letting their feelings flow.

Costing my grandfather 30 thousand dollars, I had no sword to un-sheath.
Crying like a 12 year old girl later, all of the sudden I couldnt breathe.
The walls and my eyesight were caving in, I thought i was blacking out again.
Screamming “No” came out as a gurgle, dont rember anything else.. how and when.

Today my mind is filtered blank of its divine substance.
Maybe the ceisure I had adapted me to a new life. what reluctance..
Who is this person inside me that was hiding all along underneath?
All of the sudden, I give penance stares.. like a wolf shows their teeth.

I will not let this inner being win without a fight.
No more knife in my pillow during the long cold night.
Why have I never in my life lived with a regret until very recently.
Im going serve a dish of karma to myself, with the utmost decency.

The people that know I did them wrong, and altercated with in the past couple days..
Please know that many of you aplly to this, Im sorry.. Im in some kind of daze.
Police at my house arresting my brothers father, I never hated or wished anyone dead.

I dont even know why im writing this, no one will give a fuck even after they read.

End: 7:24

Like a wolf shows their teeth...


Joined November 2009

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