Feelings Unresolved (13/11/2009)

My heart was asleep
For oh! so long!
And then with magic touch
It suddenly woke up.
All was well for a while….
Untill old feelings
Came flooding back!
What anguish, what pain,
What lonliness,
What agony, what sorrow,
What sadness…

My heart was asleep..
I thought “that is ok”
But I was wrong…
I did not solve the pain….
I did not let me cry….
I did not let me feel…
I did not let me grieve…
I did not let me love….

My heart was asleep…
And now it’s not…
The gates are open…
Feelings pouring out….
And this massive tide
Is threatening to drown
My poor little heart
With feelings unresolved.

I am drowning…
The water is rising fast,
Thrown in the deep end
“Don’t make wave please” I cry…
I try to swim slowly
but no land in sight…
I am lost in feelings….
Not sure where I’m at…

I don’t want to feel…
Yet I know I must
For I can’t move forward
Untill I forgive the past…
All the pent up tears
came pouring out at last…
I’m grieveing for my heart….
I’m crying for my life….

I’m not sorry for that time
For I learnt to survive.
Now I need to learn
How to love again…
How to trust….

My heart is open now,
My heart is fully awake.
My eyes overwhelmed with tears…
Yet I can clearly see
For the first time in years.

Bless you sun
For pouring in
And filling me inside!
Bless you light
For showing me
Where the darkness lurked
Out of sight!

I am in pain now…
But it won’t last
I will cry out
’Till all the tears pass…
The night is dark sometimes…
But the sun will always rise.

Written by Fabiana Uteda

Feelings Unresolved (13/11/2009)

Fabiana

Shepparton East, Australia

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