The lucifer principle

OK people, good news! for those who care (which i presume is limited) i managed to land myself a job! eee! seeing as i seemed to have issues with employment as i only managed to hold down two shitty three hour shifts at my local servo, the prospect of actually landing a job seemed somewhat incredibly unrealistic .
BUT, my friends, never fear for my luck has now changed. not only have i managed to get myself a job from LITERALLY the only add i could have been bothered emailing my resume to (yes thats right i didn’t even have to separate my ass from the computer chair for it), it is also not half bad! BONUS!
You see ever since making the decision not to continue with any further education after year 12 my dad has been absolutely convinced that for the rest of my life the only sentence that will have any significance to my life would be “and would you like fries with that?”. i’m sure i don’t to explain this in any more detail.
ANYways, back to the point, so i got a job! i’m sure by this stage of my rabbiting banter you now wonder what i meant when i said the job was “not half bad”. by this i am referring to the fact that a. its not a fast food joint b. i don’t have a manager named Clarence but otherwise known as “pimp daddy” and c. i actually get god damn hours!
ok, so this is all fun and happy la-la right? WRONG! by this stage u guys must be wondering what job Emilie, ME could possibly have manipulated and lied her way into. well my friends the answer is simple: Pharmacy! yes thats right, good old fashioned slip of the tongue, hit in the face, slap on the ovaries Pharmacy, the only job where you are surrounded by drugs, people buying and selling those drugs and theres not a convoy of junkies and\or crooked cops tagging around like sharks awaiting someone to throw them a bite. no, my job is nothing like that, although i can imagine it would make work a whole lot more interesting, but no its not like my job. this job involves me walking around aimlessly steeling peoples scripts, putting them in a little tub with some paper and scribble, and on occasion actually attempting (loose term) to help people find things and then lead them in the complete wrong direction. thats a favorite. give me a break but most of the people are regulars and i’ve never been to this pharmacy in my freakin life starting from whatever wast before monday! so in my opinion they should know better. shame on you stupid, ignorant, lazy drug fiends, shame on you!
anyways, the point i was making was the fact that i managed to get a job in a field that i have absolutely no knowledge\interest in whatsoever, with a resume that wasn’t even mine but that of my sister who not only finished school at 17 but worked at some dumb finance place in which i wouldn’t know its ass from its eye, only to continue to move away and jumping between about 20 jobs for her food. That doesn’t even cover all the shit when she was at school. so basically a resume of complete utter bullshit which i wouldn’t even be able to crap on about (usually not a challenge for me) if i was freakin paid!
also, the job is full time, what was wrong with those jackasses? there is like 20 bazillion girls that work at this place that have just finished school, so WHY was it that crucial to hire a rando who know diddle squat about pretty much ANYthing, who uses fake resumes and says things like “i want to know lots bout drugs” as an answer to the question “so why do you want to work in pharmacy, Emilie?”.
Wow, it really reinforces why i believe in the fine work of the good lord Lucifer, not necessarily in my favor but defiantly against the favor of the pharmacy, and in this i rest easy. this is what i like to call the Lucifer theory. Athought the book is actually a scientific, sociological, psychological and theological journey into the causes of human evil i think this title still plays relevance to my story.. somehow..
anyway, seeing as i only planned this to be a short summery of the reasons i managed to get myself a job i think i’m going to leave it at that. Also, i have to get up early tomorrow to actually GO to work. but ah well, like i said its their loss hahahah.

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