Continued Argument

I continue to write to you using paper, because words are traps to fumble over. You have heard the term “Bit of more than you can chew,” well the amounts of experience that you are giving me are not even big enough to be noticed. I end up not noticing that the bits are even in my mouth and swallow it with the rest of the items that are put into it. The amount of experience that I am given are too subtle to make any difference. I need to have something that I can chew, to sink my teeth into. If you feed a horse too little, it will end up starving and dying. If you feed a horse enough, it will stay strong and do the work that was intended for it to do. I cannot do the work God is willing of me if I am not properly fed enough experiences to live by.

I fear that you may be too scared that I might end up as a human with too much that they can handle and end up scared and depressed all of the time. I do not get depressed easily (if for not the depression I only experience because of hormones). I hardly cry or am worried about family matters. The only time that I cry or am worried is for what it might be doing to my family. I have never cried for myself besides the instinctive crying that a wound or physical pain produce. What does bother me is when a person that is capable of doing great things is kept back for years, only being allowed the minimum experience to keep up with what people are talking about from time to time. Sure, god has put you as parents to be our authorities, but who was put here to tell you when you aren’t doing the best? God does rarely give strait answers. God, or Jesus, usually speak in parables or through other people. Have you heard commonly the voice of God speak over the voices of those near you or through the air at all? No, he only does that on the rarest of occasions.
We are his tools, so he uses us. He uses us to speak to each other. I am not saying that I am speaking the word of God right now, but strongly believe that I am not allowed enough space to walk around in the prison of life. You have said yourself that I am not like normal people. I do not give into temptation easily, but am seldom exposed to it, I also have a great fear of not being truthful as a truthful person’s lie can destroy his life. A soldier is not made by training, but by battles that they survive in. If I am never exposed fully to that battles of the earth how do you expect me to survive the first battle I face when I am alone? I know that you are trying to prepare me for the world and it’s conditions, but hear this: A worker uses his hands to live. If you give a worker the tools to use, but never give him the hands to work, than he will never survive.

Continued Argument

DUKERZ

Joined February 2008

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