Make me laugh challenge - A bad attack of diarrhea....

Most embarrassing moments are caused by our own stupidity. And I am a past master at it.

I recall living in London in 1973, and suffering from a severe case of diarrhea. After a day at home and either sitting on the throne or rushing to it, I went, in utter despair, to the local chemist.

There were about ten other customers at the counter when I entered the pharmacy, and I was too embarrassed to publicly admit I had a violent attack of the shits.

So I waited until the shop emptied.

As I stood alone at the counter and informed the chemist I wanted something for severe diarrhea, what seemed like an endless stream of customers magically appeared.

“You have diarrhea?", said the chemist, whose booming voice was like a foghorn….and everyone stared at me…

Now, you have to understand that chemist shops in London also sell medicines for pets.

I turned scarlet…desperately looked around the shop seeking escape, and saw bottles of pills for dogs…and I replied: “It’s not for me….it’s for my dog…”

The chemist said in his bloody loud voice: “Your dog has diarrhea?”

All the people grinned wildly as the chemist said : “what sort of dog? Big or small?”

Of course, I had no dog…so I stammered: “He is a mid sized dog.”

“Oh, said the chemist, “We have special pills for dogs”.

Inwardly I groaned, and said: "My dog has had the shits before…. (by this time I couldn’t bring myself to say diarrhea again). “…and I have always given him what I take…”

“That’s odd,” said the chemist, as the other customers stifled their giggles.

Anyway….to cut a long story short…he sold me some stuff anyway…and I raced out of the shop.

I went back to the chemist about 12 months later, the bloody pharmacist recognised me.

The shop was again full of people, and as he saw me he called across their heads: “has your dog got diarrhea again?”

I had a momentary lapse of concentration and spluttered in total confusion: "I don’t have a dog.”

Then I remembered my previous embarrassing moment. But it was too late.

The chemist leered triumphantly, and grinned like Cheshire cat: “I always knew the pills were for you!”

Make me laugh challenge - A bad attack of diarrhea....

John Mitchell

Kyneton, Australia

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Artist's Description

I recall living in London in 1973, and suffering from a severe case of diarrhea. After a day at home and either sitting on the throne or rushing to it, I went, in utter despair, to the local chemist.

Artwork Comments

  • Gina Ruttle  (Whalegeek)
  • John Mitchell
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