"Thanks for the Mammaries"

By now you know that my family and I are just a little – well, maybe alot – off center. We’re trying to approach this whole Breast Cancer thing with comedy and I must say it helps. It keeps my mind working on things that aren’t so dreary.
If you read my daughters blog at weevilmaw.livejournal.com you may be aware that as of late we have been focusing on twisted Breast Cancer songs! Yep, folks we’re re-writing these things with flare.
If you can think of more titles or lyrics please feel free to add yours in the comments section. We’d love to hear from you – but only if you have a sense of humor, Ok.
So, here’s my first attempt at Breast Cancer Songs for the ages. When reading the lyrics please sing them to the old Bob Hope theme song of “Thanks for the Memories” – I believe Frank Sinatra also recorded it. All together now…
“Thanks for the Mammaries”
Thanks for the mammaries.
They really served me well.
The guys thought they were swell.
Their true size I’ll never tell.
How lucky I was.

And thanks for the mammaries.
Those summers by the sea.
I never wore a bikini.
They never saw the sun
But we surely did have fun
How cozy they were.

And thanks for the mammaries
It really was a thrill
Now I’ve been through the mill
I’ve lived a lot and learned a lot
I now have no lumps – still
I miss them so much

Thanks for the mammaries
The lumps my boobs destroyed
Medical reports I don’t enjoy
Tonight the way things look
I need a book by Sigmund Freud
I miss them so much.
(Repeat first verse)

OK – that’s it! Hope you liked it.
Now, here’s some new titles we’re working on.
“Can’t Buy Me Lumps’ (the Beatles Can’t Buy Me Love)
“Precious Mammaries” – favorite hymn
“My Lumps” (My Humps by Fergie)
Neon Boob (Neon Moon by Brooks & Dunn)
“Cyndi the Camel Has Two Lumps” (Sally the Camel Has Two Lumps from the Barney Show)

Remember, if you can think of any lyrics or any other Breast Cancer remake songs let us know.
Smile First, Smile Big, Smile Often.

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