Isolation

God, I feel so isolated!

It’s bad enough that I spend all day, every day, sitting here in the study/office – we run our own business from home – never seeing anyone and rarely talking to anyone other than a client and, then, only occasionaly and only for a few minutes as most of our work comes in through the fax machine.

I’ve been without a car for eight weeks now after my car was written off when my husband and I were on our way to an apoointment. The other driver admitted fault and their insurance company is willing to pay up. My insurance company is really dragging their feet on paying me the amount which has been agreed upon. Cabin fever has nothing on this, I can’t even go to the supermarket or the bank as they are over 6 kilometers away .“Can you catch public transport?”, I hear some ask. Ha! What public transport? It’s almost non-existent here. I have to ask my husband to take me anywhere I nreed or want to go as I can’t drive his car, it’s not made for small people, I’m only 5’2". I don’t feel safe driving it as I can’t see properly. The poor man is busy and still very tired after recent treatment for a serious illness.

And now, I’ve been without my external hard drive for a week as it karked it last week and my son took it with him to either fix it or get me a new one. He’d hoped to be able to tell me what was wrong with it during the week but his work has become very busy with a couple of new major clients.

The drive has all my pics on it and I have just about filled my camera’s memory card with new pics. My PC and the server . . .well, I can’t go putting any more pics on there as I’ve just about filled them; I even had to delete some of them a while back as nothing more could be stored on either. And I have a desperate urge to “create” something, anything.

I just feel so isolated and lonely – and it doesn’t help my depression one little bit, it makes it much worse.

Ignore me, please, I’m feeling sorry for myself today. Rant over for now.

Isolation

Jan Clarke

Joined January 2010

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Artist's Description

How isolation affects one, me in particular.

Featured in Core on 11.11.2010.

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