The most painful goodbye's.

Everyone says that the most painful goodbye’s are the ones you never get to say, but even the goodbye’s you get to say can be just as painful. Sometimes you have to do what you know is best for that person even though you know it’ll hurt you both. When it can be argued either way, if you should say your goodbye’s or not. You can never win, either it’s a long and drawn out and you never really say goodbye, you just fade and forget about each other – or – you just bite the bullet and say what you know needs to be said and just stop talking completely, a clean cut. But sometimes it’s not so easy to forget them no matter how hard you try. It’s the person who you never thought you’d be able to stay in the same room with, much less trust them with what you can’t tell anyone else, your biggest secrets. And of course what better of a person for it to happen to then a girl with an extreme separation anxiety. But at the same time you have to wonder if she knew it was going to happen and just set herself up for disaster. Maybe she knew this but let it grow to what it became because she was so desperate for a real friend. Someone who would be there 24/7, in the middle of the night when you thought you were pregnant. Who said they’d take you to the clinic, so what if people think badly of me, it’s more important that we can be sure you’re safe. The person you could call for anything, from cigarettes, to rides, to just talk, or even directions. But this person doesn’t know how much they really mean to you, they assume you think of them as just a friend. Really though, they are a better friend to you then people you’ve called friends for years, one of the few friends you love, but the only one you can’t tell. Life sucks, but you have to do what’s best for them, right? If someone’s been this great to you don’t you owe it to them to do what’ll be best for them in the long run.

(Don’t worry Alex, it’s not about you.)

Journal Comments