berndt2

Joined July 2007

Bernd Talasch doesn’t remember being hatched in a research laboratory in Omaha in the late 1950s so maybe that never happened....

Elle Style Awards and London Fashion Week 2016

way back in the day, a younger more impressionable me used to head out with a camera and photograph the strangeness of London Fashion Week. Not from the catwalks and press junket (because how does a 9-5 Pricing Analyst get access to THAT?) – but from streetside, where the wannabes, the weirdos, the fellow freaks and oddballs congregated.

I posted the results in London Fashion Week Journals back in 2013 (and they were even featured by Redbubble), but thanks to the vagaries of facebook weblinking, those journals have been ravaged by the sands of time and irrelelvance…. until I retrieved them and reposted them on my website this year, expanded and enhanced

London Fashion Week 2013
London Fashion Week 2013

And embarrassingly (?) three years later I’m still doing my thing, along with grudgingly admitting I might have also done the same event(s) in 2012, 2014 and 2015 as well.

But this is 2016. Things are all modern and exciting. Even Somerset House is passe now, and no longer the hallowed turf of London Fashion Week. No… a multistorey carpark in SoHo is!!

Here’s a synopsis of the madness (with the larger and more complete journal being located here )


Dear London Fashion Week… why not let London’s cab drivers, delivery vans, and couriers know that there’s a fashion week on so they don’t add to the already extreme traffic?


“This sh*t better go on Instagram. I don’t dress like this just to get facebook likes”


“Julie… I think those are UGLY people! How the hell did they get here?”


“If your hair dye is behaving erratically, press >four< and please hold. Your call is important to us.”


“That’s your SECOND piece of popcorn, Barbara, you PIG!”


“Julie, there’s photographers EVERYWHERE… and none of them are photographing me….”


“Jerry? I dropped them into blue food colouring and somehow they multiplied…..”


“If anyone dressed like this as well, I’m going to cry..”


Brooklyn Hipster is so indifferent to #LFW that he doesn’t know or care that he’s in LONDON.


“Mom… you now how you said that thing would happen if I wasn’t careful, and I said I didn’t believe you? Well… it happened”


It’s going to be sad when, tomorrow, the process of taking photos of random good-looking and/or well-dressed strangers on the street will once again be viewed with suspicion…

So that was (a sample of the) five days of London Fashion Week that I as a mere mortal can expect to gain access to…. but it all ends in the glory of the Elle Style Awards…. and here’s a sample of THAT:

(The full journal is here )


Once the sun had set and the temperature had dropped enough to make me pleased I was wearing two jumpers AND a ski jacket… I found myself in unfamiliar territory : namely, the Paparazzi pen. How did I manage that? Well… I’m going to say ‘magic’.


I don’t know who this is, but I’d like to (or at least until Rosie Huntington-Whitely shows up).


Elizabeth Olsen is best known as Scarlett Witch in The Avengers, …and I do believe she and I have made a connection the likes of which most Nicholas Sparks movies would look like garden shed maintenance manuals in comparison.


Apparently Toni Garrn is 23 years old… and has an exposed bellybutton displayed at an air temperature of something like 3 degrees celsius. Regardless of age, I don’t understand kids….


I didn’t previously know what an “Arizona Muse” was. Apparently it’s a person, and not some kind of exotic premium tea all the cool people are drinking at fashion shows.


Rosie Huntington-Whitely is so pretty I’m starting to go hazy on the name of the girl with whom I made an epoch-smashing connection earlier…. I think her name was ‘Steve’ or something?


“Did you just take a battery out of your pocket or are you just happy to see me?” I…. am glad I’ve restored some charge to my battery. As model Karlie Kloss arrives, stopping traffic and causing hearby helicopters to burst into flame… or so I assume


Karlie Kloss having gone inside, the world seems both colder and darker, and then some male model shows up thinking maybe we want to be photograhing him.


“Carl… get my sunglasses. And a baseball bat” – designer Stella McCartney arrives fashionably late(ish)

so… that was a rather interesting and enjoyable five or so days. The next one of these is in September, and I’m not sure whether I’ll be able to do what I’ve only managed once in five previous years : go to both February and September London Fashion Weeks. We’ll see…

Until next time!

btw : here’s the archive of all my movie premieres and events

btw : On the off-chance you want to see if I’ve uploaded a new premiere journal (I don’t always post them on redbubble) you can follow me on facebook here
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Journal Comments

  • Nikolay Semyonov
  • Nikolay Semyonov
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