Joined July 2007

Bernd Talasch doesn’t remember being hatched in a research laboratory in Omaha in the late 1950s so maybe that never happened....

The Invisible Woman premiere - Voldermort! Snape! (Fiennes! Rickman! Scott Thomas!)

The weather is getting colder but there are actually quite a few premieres scheduled in the upcoming month or so. About once a year a premiere gets held at the Odeon Kensington which is away from central London and Leicester Square. Two years ago it was the Madonna-helmed W.E. and last year it was Witherspoon, Hardy and Pine for This Means War. This year, it’s the Ralph Fiennes-helmed Charles-Dickens movie “The Invisible Woman”.

Here’s how it went down.

We start this journal with a shot of The Invisible Woman being interviewed, in this instance by an Invisible Cameraperson. (And if you didn’t think I’d be making that kind of horrific attempt at humour you obviously haven’t read many of these journals )

“Is that supposed to hypnotise me or something?”
“No, just give you a splitting headache”

“You should see how many DSLR-movie-mode Wannabes I can catch with this thing”

Director (also and Lead Actor) Ralph Fiennes arrives, and already I know I’m going to have trouble getting any sleep for the rest of this week.

Felicity Jones arrives, and my Pentax’s autofocus starts putting in even more overtime. (Centre-focus, always). She’s apparently best known for the film “Like Crazy” but on her imdb page I’m drawn to the film “Hysteria” which happens to be my favourite song by Def Leppard.

“Terry, take those off. You look ridiculous wearing them and probably can’t hear anything when you’re interviewing anybody”
“I’m sorry, Jack. I can’t hear you. But please tell me if I look ridiculous wearing these things”

Kristin Scott Thomas is unhappy about my opinion on her rhinestone studded shirt before I’ve even had a chance to formulate it. She’s probably best known for being in ‘proper’ movies like Gosford Park and Four Weddings and a Funeral, and The English Patient, but I remember her best from the first Tom Cruise Mission Impossible film.

Okay… Swarovski Crystal-studded, then?

“But of course you had a choice of being in my movie or not, just like you have a choice of hugging me right now or not. It’s just that the failure to comply is unreasonably severe. It’s a philosophy I base my whole Order on” Ralph Fiennes looks particularly evil sometimes, even when not clean shaven and without nose.

“Well, I guess a third contract signed in blood won’t invalidate the other two…”
I do like that the hypnosis-device in the background becomes kind of a halo in this shot.

“Anybody else want to join my newly reformed organisation? Refusal would be unwise” Voldemort is recruiting, people. Harry Potter was just lucky last time.

The mighty trio pose for the Paparazzi.

Tom Burke has an enviable IMDB entry but of all of it “Only God Forgives” rings a bell. Between this and my knowledge of Kristen Scott Thomas’ filmography (and constantly referring to Ralph Fiennes, who has had multiple Oscar and BAFTA nominations, as ‘Voldemort’) I’m probably going to have trouble retaining any pretense of being a film connoisseur.

“The dress? It weighs fifty kilos and is insured for $8.6million. Which is as much as the production company has insured my spine for when wearing it”

I kind of like this shot. (The fan she was posing next to was holding his camera incredibly high, in case you’re interested in the Making Of)

“Shut up! Maybe Pentax once again had zero showcased entries in this year’s Natural Wildlife Photographer of the Year competition. It’s still a legitimate choice and a legitimate brand”. Precisely what I’ve been telling everyone who’ll listen, Mr Fiennes.

Brief sidenote : see? Pentax can take wildlife shots.

“You should definitely all join the Death Eaters. Their medical benefits are top-notch and their leader is relatively benevolent. Usually.”

“I’ve been authorised to tell you he’s absolutely right”

Ilan Eshkeri is the film’s soundtrack composer. And I always make a point of photographing composers because I think more of them than simply Hans Zimmer (who is awesome) should be invited to premieres. (And I do know who he is : he’s one of the composers from the movie Kick-Ass, whose multi-composer score is very good)

To those of you who thought Lord Voldemort and Professor Snape would never patch things up after the last Harry Potter film (especially since – spoilers – both of them died), here’s a nice bit of reconciliation. Alan Rickman shows up to wish Ralph Fiennes all the best. Or seek vengeance, I guess.

Professor Snape knows you’re been cheating in Potions Class yet again.

“Thanks for all the flashes you’re setting off. They’re really helping to supplement my failing winter tan. I’m going to turn around and let you work on the other side now”

Abi Morgan is the screenwriter of this, and was also co-writer of “Shame” with Director Steve McQueen. Sadly, the writer of the book it was based on was wearing a hat so implausible I dismissed her as a random guest…. meaning I never photographed her. I’ve done worse at premieres, but not often.

“See, Mark? I told you those elbow patches would make you look tall”
“I’m not sure they’re to blame”
Joanna Scanlan plays Catherine Dickens in the film.

So.. that’s another premiere for my ever-growing and harder-than-ever to intelligently sort through Archive of Movie Premieres . There’s actually another premiere scheduled this week, plus two the following week, plus one and the BAFTAS AND London Fashion Week the week after that….. so I’d better get some sleep……..Until next time!

Journal Comments

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