[fleeting organic coincidense modification omnipresents streaming fragmental reconnection homeostasis movements]

93.

i stopped the stopwatch but it continued ticking
i sung the song mind continued humming variations of praise
i took inventory:
temperature,instruments, ability, admirers, information,
all that i expect is what leaves me wanting more than this moment
more and more satisfied
more and more worries are contrasted with the greater worries of the globe
i am waiting on the lord to pick the proper moment for my emergence
and everyday i prepare my lips my heart and spirit for such an occurrence/occassion
when even my own idiosyncracies are done away with
and sit by the woman who no one dare go near and strike up conversation
these little things
and what if she doesn’t want to be bothered
what if i talked as a precursor for listening
lord grant i the willpower to not back down to not avert eye contact with passerby’s
to not be short for words when they’re needed the most
or even the most simplest gesture
i let the fool guide me to metaphors that i could never find
what a poor choice of words fool lets say equal griever
my list of achievements are worthless and odd
and what i want out life will…
i don’t want to stop caring about the world
i want to not be stricken by anxiety
i want to be the believer i am and have the eyes of man lit up from scripture
some barrier has always stopped the scream
my lord it may be premature
it is a voice one can’t anticipate
only the receivers can tell my development
i have enveloped disagreements,anger,frustration,sardonic insults into my cry
compliments, golden visions, calm winds, swooping birds, clumsy kinds, and eavesdropping facial expressions
getting over myself by being engaged in ones surroundings
even browse through the world new
even if i were deaf to these struggles
if i were oblivious in the woods
unconsciously i would dream these dramas
feel the strain and tension in my muscles
from the lip to mouthpiece
fault lines rifting
an interdependant pollination
mating ritual
exfoliation
preparation for reuninon with the beloved omnipresent unseen
i already feel safe

[fleeting organic coincidense modification omnipresents streaming fragmental reconnection homeostasis movements]

ariyahjoseph

Corvallis, United States

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