Love or Lust

Tomorrow may just be the last day I see him…. Tomorrow. How can such a powerful flirtation come to an end, I do find myself asking how did I get involved in such a love affair. I will miss him surely? Surely? I miss him when he is right next to me, purely because I know he is not mine, he is hers and will always be hers. Ill miss those eyes that I can see visually eating me alive, those eyes that have a glint of desire when he sees me. That knowing look that we have something magical and passionate. I want to say good bye because I know this can’t go any where – surely it can’t. He makes me feel alive, my heart races and my skin quivers when he is next to me. Is it love or is it lust?

I find myself asking this question daily, Love or Lust?

Why am I constantly faced with these temptations? I am always falling for Mr Unattainable or Mr Unavailable, but for the past year it has been Mr Unemotional. He hurt me the most. Before him I could not and did not want to feel. He opened my eyes to love, for the first time I felt the joy of loving someone. He also showed me how it was to love someone who did not reciprocate these feelings. I still want him now occasionally only because I crave his attention and that’s all he has ever given me – his attention, no feelings, no commitment and definitely no love. He uses me for his own personal pleasure and knows exactly how to play me. I don’t deserve to be used nor played. Why do I let someone hurt me so much – love or lust?

It’s the story of my life; I fall hardest for the men who know how to play me the most. The men who are charming and know exactly what words will make my heart melt. The men who will always break my heart, now that I’ve realised I’ve got one. It’s the men that know when to give me attention and when to ignore me. It’s the men who know exactly how to play their game and not mine. It’s the men who know the difference between love and lust. All I want to know is – when will I be loved instead of lusted.

Love or lust – when does one stop and the other one begin?

Love or Lust

Anita37

Joined October 2008

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life love lust

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