Oh Lord Grant Me Just One More Day....

Fist smacks chest, I double over.
Pulls my hair, wrenching me up once more.
Imprints his thumbs and fingers bones
Into my chin and cheeks,
Bruising – he crushes the virgin skin.
Presses his booze stinking breath against my face;
He bellows abuse and filth riled language toward me,
Fetch me this, no good for that, do it, bitch, do it now.

Dare not challenge for fear of what might come next,
Just do as he says, kids are in bed – at least safe.
Placate him, ease his soreness, feed him – Let him sleep.
What then? Tomorrow he’ll be different – sorry,
He loves me and his children,
Just drink changes him – he becomes a monster,
Danger by night from chemical persuasion, intolerance, -
Surely not his fault – an illness – we’ll get help.

Promises of love, of change; befall my ears next day.
We try again, but deep inside I know he’s not ready,
Not ready to accept change and tolerance.
Not ready to seek the help of those who know more.
We don’t go, queues for councillors months away, -
Time by which we think situation will have long passed.
How very wrong we could be as Friday nights pay comes in,
A familiar sickening pattern resumes. And fear sets in again!

Familiar prayer returns, as I ask to be a survivor. -
Oh Lord grant me just one more day, that I may live,
To find new hope, some where safe to lay my head.
To take the children that he may harm their gentle minds no more.
Send your soul to rescue us and free us to peace once more,
Only this time I will find the strength to go….Amen

Oh Lord Grant Me Just One More Day....

anaisnais

Pembrokeshire, United Kingdom

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