GoodFellas

As far back as these two could remember, they always wanted to be canine Goodfellas. To them, being a canine Goodfella was better than winning Best in Show at the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show. It meant being somebody in a house full of nobodies and doing whatever they wanted. They double-parked in front of a hydrant and nobody ever gave them a boot. In the summer when they were out all night sniffin' the town, nobody ever called them back in. See, the hardest thing for them was leaving the life. They still love the life. And they were treated like movie stars with muscle. They had it all, just for the asking. They had paper bags filled with bones stashed in the kitchen. They had a water bowl full of cow ears next to the bed. Anything they wanted was a phone call away. Free treats. And they ran everything. Everybody had their hands out. Everything was for the taking. And now it's all over. And that's the hardest part. Today, everything is different. There's no action. They have to wait around like everyone else. Can't even get decent food. Right after they got here, they ordered some meat on the bone and instead got grain-free kibble. They're average nobodies. They get to live the rest of their lives like mutts. (Please note: Excerpts taken from the "Goodfellas" film for parody purposes only.)

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