Humor Writing

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• We're a bit different in Australia
  by Darren Stones

  Believe it or not, kangaroos and emus are exempt from paying the bridge toll as they dash across the Sydney Harbour Bridge.

  Add Darren Stones to your Watchlist Click banner to enter Darren’s web site. Media, Entertainment & Arts Alliance member. Word count: 570 Photographs: 12 This article and accompanying photographs are for sale. Contact Darren via e-mail for further details. © Darren Stones 2007.

• Ode to RedBubble
  by Stephen Mitchell

  I’ve been uploading to RedBubble for only one week, / Already I’m classified as an “upload geek”.

  A short poem in honour of the home we call “Our Red Bubble”.

• On Aging and Other Matters
  by Julie Marks

  IF YOU DON’T READ THIS TO THE VERY END, YOU HAVE LOST A DAY IN YOUR LIFE. AND WHEN YOU HAVE FINISHED, DO AS I AM DOING AND SEND IT ON. 
 …

  We all need a good laugh given the stresses we deal with daily / about our personal and collective fears. It is important for everyone, especially our creative community to Laugh often, long and loud. Never take guilt trips. Take a trip to the market or a foreign country, but Not to where the guilt is. This is a list on aging and other important tips about coping with life in the new millennium.Reading the irreverent George Carlin and other satiric comics is one way I deal with stress. Writing a bibliography for artists to facilitate the creative process would include books and quotes by humorists from Carl Reiner and Mel Brooks routine of the “Old Man” to Lily Tomlin’s many characters like the inimitable Ernestine and more currently Adam Sandler’s audio on the importance of the F word. You may not enjoy dark humor, but since I enjoy a range of comedy including Susan Msork’s quotes when she visits her “pondering pool,” I think everyone will find something funny in some of the witty and brilliant humor that has caused millions of people to LAUGH until they gasp throughout the decades. Laughing builds endorphins and is a great way to manage stress, psychological and physical pain. Using humor in therapy is very important and several books have been written on the subject. I have not yet unleashed the full range of my humor, but I have several unusual and unique concepts to reveal including who is the REAL Santa Claus, discontinued dolls like Barbie’s sister Skipper winding her arm to suddenly enter puberty, Billy and Carlos dolls, Mommy’s having twins, Magic Earring Ken in a Barbie box among many other dolls and toys that have become classics. Since I not only studied to become a Psychologist, I am also a Bogologist and will introduce my family of Boglins, rubbery puppets from the 80’s. You will meet my collection of weenie babies, Lillian, my dog Molly’s Grandwitch who appears in one photo in my series, Political Dogs, La Senora Belladona, our resident gypsy who has many interesting beauty tips to share with us and recently asked her closest friend Wanda, a gypsy turned hippie to teach her how to master reading tarot cards. The fact that Wanda is my dog Mikey’s Granny adds another sentimental journey for our family. Wanda arrives in Los Angeles Saturday to join our unusual family. You will meet Dwork, Vloob and Drool and their smaller cousins and the cult hero from the 50’s film, The Attack of the 50’ woman. I also have many useful tips to design a home to share with our animal companions, introducing “gentle-dogs” and barking luxury ladies. Dogs have managed to be taken seriously as customers. They are treated to luxury spas, massage, aromatherapy, sleep away camps, hotels that cater to canines and other luxuries that humans choose to give to their devoted animal companions rather than themselves.

• The Monkey's Truth
  by hatefueled

  Okay. There’s this chick who works for NASA. she looks after the monkeys there. Names one ‘God’ because she’s religious, The mo…

  A short and twisted comical theory story about a Monkey.

• Soul Shoplifting
  by George Yesthal

  “I came here for you” she whispered and ran her ring finger ever so lightly across the back of my hand.

  Danger haunts even the marketplace.

• LUCKY EDDIE
  by Mugsy

  Lucky Eddie wasn’t baptized with that moniker, he was baptized Eduardo de la Hoya Miguel Hildago Antonio Trujillo Fuentes, by the village…

• Talk of love
  by David Roman

  But let one person talk of sex and eyeballs start to roll

  A look at us and where we stand !

• HOME SECURITY SYSTEM
  by Dyle Warren

  HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM IN THE SOUTH / / 1 Go to a secondhand store and buy a pair of used men’s work boots, size 14-16. ...

  this came to me via email…...author unknown.

• HOW TO PREPARE FOR AN EMERGENCY (humor)
  by amarica

  Humor, not intended to be taken seriously

  Humorous article not intended to be taken seriously. I wrote this article for a newspaper I worked for as a spoof on Emergency Rationing. We all need a good laugh and it is good when we can laugh at ourselves. It heps relieve the tension in life and give us fresh outlook on our situation.

• Capturing the bark at Dog Rocks
  by Darren Stones

  Would a dog even bother to cock its leg against that tree?

  Media, Entertainment & Arts Alliance member. The photo Word count: 311 Photographs: 2 This article and accompanying photographs are for sale. Contact me via e-mail for further details. Words and photographs are © Darren Stones 2007.

• Sympathy for the Tree
  by G. Merrick Justice

  When a tree falls out of anyone’s earshot…

• FOR MARLO, THESE ARE MOMENTS IN MY LIFE WHEN BRAIN FUNCTION WAS MINIMAL IF AT ALL...NEED I SAY MORE?
  by JaneAParis

  Then his parents came home. He was freaked out and so was I. So he hid me in his closet…

  !!! / !!! / !!! / !!! / These are moments in my life when brain function was minimal if at all…need I say more?

• You Silly Cat
  by Ruben Flanagan aka (Flan)

  You …

• Stiff but not Dead
  by S.I. Sheehan and T.H. Repasky

  It had been a long day, dragging by. Not much to get up about. After all what was the point of trying when everything was closed. It woul…

  Sometimes I give myself a subject and challenge myself to create a writing. Often they end up in the trash or worse on some web site LOL

• I May Become A Nun!
  by loramae

  I just couldn’t rhyme my frustration….

  Well??? What do ya think?....help a girl out…Nun or no?...:)

• Eh?!
  by VanSnuG

  Oxymoron?

• the Best and the Worst
  by VanSnuG

  The Worst man that a woman can get is a Gadget Buff, he will REPLACE her for NEWER One every 6 months or so. / The Best man for her is an …

• Dirty Little Secret
  by bchrisdesigns

  NSFW

• Hero for Hire
  by Peter Davidson

  The Spanish inquisition .. No one expects the Spanish Inquisition.

• Connect The Dots
  by Scott Ruhs

  And when the connection’s complete …..

  These are lyrics to a blues song I wrote in 1998. There is a demo version of the song here You will need quicktime to listen to it.

• That's No Bull
  by Bonnie Taylor Barry

  Stress! I hated what it did to me and to my family, yet it was an everyday factor in our lives . . .

• War on Wane
  by Crokus Label

  Wayne, the wicked Wicca Witch of the West, Wasted a Wagon in a Ward…..

  I wrote this when I lived in Vancouver… I had a roommate whose name was Wayne, and who had emptied my fridge from all it’s food, made a whole bunch of long distance calls on MY phone, and to top it off, had made a black mass in his bedroom in my “honor” ... he was surrounded with 12 black candles, and he was mumbling… When a few minutes later I was to burn some sage (which is a spiritual cleanser in American Native culture and used as a deodorant or incent) he accused me of burning “pot”... / I told him that it was sage from The great north (which is true) and he kept accusing me of burning drugs, but would keep from talking about my food he had eaten and my phone that was now very expensive. I got mad. So I grabbed my dictionary (as I was in my 2nd or 3rd year into learning english) and I left for my writer-friend’s place… When my friend opened the door, he saw that I was mad. -He never had seen me mad before asked me why I looked mad. So I said to him… “Wayne!!!... I am mad at him! I bet that there are no definitions for such an a**hole in that dictionary…” So I opened the dictionary randomly, and got on the word “wane” on the page that I opened it to… / So I exclaim… “There IS a definition for him in that dictionary… he is the “decreasing” kind of person… “ “Give me 15 minutes alone, I got to write my anger out…” ...and this is what I wrote. (I am not sure that the whole is here, for most of my works are packed in boxes at the moment… I used my memory to write it here now.)

• Painter Of The Sky
  by G. Merrick Justice

  It becomes a hotel room painting once it leaves the sky; / it just looses it’s luster, / don’t ask me why.

  This is meant in no offense to the artists I am interacting with (I am one myself). Simply, I had to note the loss of “something” in transition from the heavens to the canvass.

• The Last Chapter of an Unwritten Book Likely To Have a Sequel
  by G. Merrick Justice

  “But you’re…”, Rexus looked over to where his friend’s body still lay in the grass. “I just… you’re dead…” /

  You may want to start at the beginning with The First Chapter of an Unwritten Book Likely To Have a Sequel