I was going to write about my experience at the Paddington Markets...
I was going to write about my experience at the Paddington Markets after the first week but I though I’d wait till a month passed so that I had a better understanding of how it was going to be overall. Many people had said that it can be very up and down, and the were spot on. The biggest predicament so far has been where they place my stall. the first week there, I was in the ‘platinum’ area where much of the other arts and crafts are. it was a great vibe and the people around me were really friendly. I had a constant stream of interest and sold shirts and badges frequently. The 2nd and thirds week in contrast were not much fun. I was placed adjacent to the food area and on top of the playground. The smell of onion and screaming of kids was really not enjoyable and had a huge impact on the interest and frequency of sales. It was a little scary to get though half the day and not sell anything while watching people walk like zombies towards the irresistible smell of cooking sausage and onion. I made enough of a fuss to get placed back into the platinum area on the fourth week and it was back to where I feel I belong :) It a has so far been a lot of fun and very educational for me. I have said to a number of people that I was thinking about doing a masters at university that can cost upwards of $10,000, but then I decided why not instead invest into a small business idea that will more than likely make me work harder, teach me more, and at the very least earn back a few dollars. In all its a great way to spend my saturdays. My partner shannon is out there and we visit each other regularly and run away from our stall to have lunch together. She has been so helpful in helping teaching me the ins and outs of the markets and its funny to think the we are now “market honeys” Hope you enjoyed reading my account and if you get the chance come say hi! Scotty / Here is a picture of my stall. the Japanese privacy screens at the back really sets my little shirts shop apart / Here is a photo of some of the shirts, the middle 2 were from redbubble and I called them “One Offs” hehe. / I present my badges in muffin trays and have made a habit of buying 2 cupcakes in the morning. Its a great conversation starter and I get to eat them at the end of the day!
Over the next few months I intend to take those willing to read, on a literary adventure through the bubble. As an investigative journali…
Over the next few months I intend to take those willing to read, on a literary adventure through the bubble. As an investigative journalist and member of the bubble I will aim to place some meaning behind some of the more interesting and popular images on the bubble, I will endeavour to give the reader insight into such important questions as… • Is there a relationship going on between Paul Vanzella and Jo O’Brien / • Does Mel Brackstone wear waders all the time and does her tripod have crustaceans and seaweed on it / • Who would win the fight if Stuart Chapman and Mel Brackstone met on a beach? / • Flibble how does he do that? / • Deborah Parkin has she painted her house and family black and white on purpose I am sure that there will be more questions that I will investigate over time and if there are specific issues that you feel need answers then get in touch and I’ll see what I can do. please note that all comments are completely fictitious and intended to be humorous. The journal relates to my interpretation of the art and to stories that I make up about the artist as a bubble characters rather than focusing on the real people behind the art This has been inspired by a comment from Paul Vanzella relating to the comments that I have posted on several of his recent works – all of which I find truly astounding Andrew
Following several knock backs and aborted attempts to gain access to Paul Vanzella I have finally…
Following several knock backs and aborted attempts to gain access to Paul Vanzella I have finally managed to jimmy the lock and enter the building that houses his workshop. It’s quite dirty to look at, yet remains aesthetically pleasing at the same time (much like a lot of his work). I have no doubt that I’m going in the right direction. There are bright flashes of light from the other end of this cavernous room, a cackling laughter can be heard along with a drone of generators / I’m entering the inner sanctum, the magic place that Paul (the Van Man) Vanzella creates his masterpieces. It’s hard to get into the corner, the bric a brack thickens as you get closer, then after squeezing between a digger and a airplane fuselage (that I’m sure I have seen before), I’m there! Blinking in the full glare of the spotlights lighting this whole area! / “WHO DARES DISTURB ME?” booms a voice from the shadows, I can just make out the outline of a figure in the lights. It looks like one of the aliens from Close encounters!!! Shock horror – Paul Vanzella is not human, hold on a moment, that’s hardly news is it, I mean we have all seen his work! / From behind me I hear movement, like the wind through silk curtains, suddenly I realise that I’m not here in the light on my own! Oh no the Van-man is in the middle of a shoot, that means if I turn round I’ll get an eyeful of Jo (No Clothes) O’Brien. / Trying to ‘nonchalantly’ turn around, I manage to avoid the expected whiplash and there in front of me stands No Clothes O’Brien ! In the nip , her birthday suit, wearing just a smile! Do I need to go on? / She looks less than happy at me being there! “how dare you” she squeeks, “we were just in the middle of recreating the Venus Di Milo! But we were going to call it the Jo Di Milo” ahh that explains the strange yellow sheen to Miss O’Brien’s skin, and here was me thinking it was jaundice. She makes no move to hide herself, instead she hisses, “best look elsewhere four eyes or I’ll turn those glasses your wearing into contact lenses!” she’s not joking there’s a real violence in her you can see it in her eyes and the scabs on her knuckles! / Turning back was where I got the whiplash “just do exactly as I say and nobody will get hurt” she whispered into my ear “isn’t that right Pauly?” she cackled. The lights dimmed and I could make the Van Man out a little clearer, he wasn’t an alien he was chained to the camera, in fact 5 camera’s hung round his neck making him visibly stoop, his ankles were chained together…a look of the defeated in his eyes he mouthed “Help Me…”. / So there we have it, Paul Vanzella is being held against his will and forced to take pictures of Jo ‘No Clothes’ O’Brien (his number one fan!), in her dastardly scheme to take over the bubble with the power and volume of her image. Oh the inhumanity of it! PLEASE NOTE THAT THE EPISODES FOLLOW ON FROM EACH OTHER IN A SOAP OPERA STYLE. WHILST EACH EPISODE SHOULD BE A STORY IN ITSELF IT IS HOPED THEY THREAD TOGETHER. THERE ARE MORE EPISODES TO READ, JUST CLICK HERE! SOAP BUBBLE please note that all comments are completely fictitious and intended to be humorous. The journal relates to my interpretation of the art and to stories that I make up about the artist as a bubble characters rather than focusing on the real people behind the art
As I sink in my chair, strong coffee in hand, wishing it was something more potent…. I wonder if any of you really need to hear my stor…
As I sink in my chair, strong coffee in hand, wishing it was something more potent…. I wonder if any of you really need to hear my story of disaster, but then I smile and realize I have an important message to share…. You simply must NOT lose yourself in the bubble for too long, or too often. / Life does have habit of sneaking up on you, or past you when you are missing in action…..(or engrossed in the bubble). / It can even be dangerous for health, home and sanity…. / I just learned that the hard way….. Here I sat, several hours ago, morning coffee in hand, the kids were on the school bus, the animals fed, a load of washing was buzzing away in the machine and I felt safe to “indulge” ...... / aaah….even the noises in the laundry, the animal sounds, the bird song could not shake my focus on some of your wonderful images…... and writing my messages back to you…. / UNTIL… / crash…. / bang… / holy shite! / on my front verandah, the sound of hooves….BIG ones! (now I have little horses who often would climb up on my old wooden verandah and clatter around to get my attention, or look for treats, but this was way too big for them!) I carefully open my front door, and there staring me in the face – a big black cow’s butt…..well, a steer’s rear end, to be exact. / This bloody great thing with his herd had wandered into my front yard demolishing everything in sight, and he, with the huge stick on his neck (put there because he kept getting through fences and I can tell you, it obviously hasn’t stopped him!) had decided to climb up the steps and wander casually along my verandah….eating my pot plants…. / So there he was in the sunshine, casually gazing out at his lesser buddies from the height of my humble verandah….. I knew if I scared him from behind like this, he would smash the glass table and chairs, the kids’ bikes and the multitude of potted plants and fall of the high end of the verandah (I live on the slope of a hill) so I thought I might go around and climb out my bedroom window and chase him quietly (ha ha) back to the opening where he might “get off”..... I decided to grab the broom from the laundry to help and as I stepped out to the back half of my house, my feet went ankle deep in water. / The whole room was flooded…. a hose had come unplugged, and both cycles of the washing machine dumped out on the laundry floor…..and you know the best thing about living in an old farm house? / When someone builds on a back room, they do it on the cheap, nobody bothers with a spirit level, so the floors slope the wrong way…..the drain holes are all uphill, and the water floods downhill. / again I say “holy you know what!!” So there was the kids playroom, carpet and couch, the bathroom, the sunroom and laundry all under water, and it was still flowing back through to the rest of my house. Did I use a four letter word? / who? / me? / (No I used dozens! AND made up some new ones….) The bovine was forgotten, I grabbed the broom and started swishing the water back towards any opening where i might get it out of those rooms. Grabbing clothes and clean washing to be folded, and kids toys and books up out of the water…... / aaaah you get the picture. / OF course the water just kept flooding back….. living on a hill has its perks ha ha…...but for this I would need to turn the house around. I wondered if I could knock a hole in the downhill wall and just let it out that way….. / but NO… / it had to be mopped and swished and cleaned up, every damn last drop. On one frantic rush through the house to get more towels and mops, I spied the RB screen waiting on my computer and just thought… / “damn!” Meantime, going into all those dark places under cupboards and behind things, it washed out numerous little inhabitants, the eightlegged kind, so I had a bit of a flood of red back spiders emerging too….. so….that just made it all the more fun. / Living dangerously …. Two hours later, aching back, wet feet, wet everydamnthing…. I drag out the carpets and furniture onto the back lawn, to see the bloody steer’s buddies in my back yard now, eating and shiiitting under my clothesline…. / Where’s the dog when you need her? / (oh of course, running under the house with the wet shoes I put outside to dry, isn’t she!) Then to the front verandah which now has broken boards and the scene of destruction where the clever beastie jumped off the verandah and took all the ceramic pots with him…..smasho! / How can one gentle animal create such a mess ….. (but I shan’t complain because this kind animal saved his bowel movement till he ran off down the track…..phew! mighty thoughtful…..) So…I tell you, next time you sit and indulge at Redbubble, bear in mind that life still goes on around you, and it can catch you up and overtake you in a big bad way if you are not watching…...it can even smash up the front of your house, crap at the back of it and flood everything in between…. but hey, / I came back to Redbubble didn’t I !!!
I wanted to share a funny experience I had with my Brother-In-law back in 2005. / I also consider him one of my best friends. We always h…
I wanted to share a funny experience I had with my Brother-In-law back in 2005. / I also consider him one of my best friends. We always have fun whatever we do. Vincent Vartorella – who just joined redbubble a while back is my brother-in-law in case you don’t know. When we go places we love to take our cameras. It doesn’t matter where we go or what we are doing. I guess you could say we share the same interest in photography and enjoy it. / We screw around all time and we are always sneaking pictures of each other and having fun when the other isn’t looking. We probably have more pictures of each other than you could imagine and we just laugh. We went on a all day golf trip and I took my Sony Cybershot small camera with us, it was new at the time. / We used the heck out of that camera shooting every shot you could imagine. / It was a blast. We were heading to the 17th green and I said “Hey I have an idea, why don’t you go up on the green and I will hit a shot towards the green and we can see what it looks like on video. We never used the camera for video. So we wanted to see how the quality was. I dropped a ball about 100 yards from the green and he went and stood directly by the flag. / Of course he had to add his commentary to the shot which made this hilarious. Go Here / To see what happened. To this day we still laugh and can not believe this happened. / What are the odds? So one day I posted it on You Tube for fun. The funny part is its kind of popular I have a ton of hits on it.
I absolutely had to share this email with everyone around here…. For your enjoyment! *Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational A clev…
I absolutely had to share this email with everyone around here…. For your enjoyment! Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational A clever play on words in case you missed it. Here is the Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational which, once again, asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. The winners are: 1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time. / 2. Ignoranus: A person who’s both stupid and an arsehole. / 3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. / 4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly. / 5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future. / 6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting lucky. / 7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high. / 8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it. / 9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late. / 10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness. / 11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.) / 12. Karmageddon: It’s when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes, and it’s a serious bummer. / 13. Decafalon (n.): The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you. / 14. Glibido: All talk and no action. / 15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. / 16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web. / 17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out. / 18. Caterpallor (n.): The colour you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you’re eating. / / The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. And the winners are: 1. coffee (n.): the person upon whom one coughs. / 2. flabbergasted (adj.): appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained. / 3. abdicate (v.): to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. / 4. esplanade (v.): to attempt an explanation while drunk. / 5. willy-nilly (adj.): impotent. / 6. negligent (adj.): absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown. / 7. lymph (v.): to walk with a lisp. / 8. gargoyle (n.): olive-flavoured mouthwash. / 9. flatulence (n.): emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller. / 10. balderdash (n.): a rapidly receding hairline. / 11. testicle (n.): a humorous question on an exam. / 12. rectitude (n.): the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists. / 13. pokemon (n.): a Rastafarian proctologist. / 14. oyster (n.): a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms. / 15. Frisbeetarianism (n.): the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there. / 16. circumvent (n.): an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men. So good!
The largest cell in the human body is the female egg and the smallest is the male sperm. It takes your food seven seconds to get from…
The largest cell in the human body is the female egg and the smallest is the male sperm. It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 3 kg (6 lb). / / The average man’s penis is three times the length of his thumb. / / Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. / / A woman’s heart beats faster than a man’s. / / There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet. / / Women blink twice as often as men. / / The average person’s skin weighs twice as much as the brain. / / Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when yo u are standing still. / / If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it. / / Men who read this are probably still busy checking their thumbs. / /
As a young minister, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a grave- / side service for a homeless man, with no family or friends. The …
As a young minister, I was asked by a funeral director to hold a grave- / side service for a homeless man, with no family or friends. The funeral / was to be held at a cemetery way back in the country, and this man / would be the first to be laid to rest there. As I was not familiar with / the backwoods area, I became lost; and being a typical man did not stop / for directions. I finally arrived an hour late. I saw the backhoe and / the crew, who were eating lunch, but the hearse was nowhere in sight. I apologized to the workers for my tardiness and stepped to the side / of the open grave, where I saw the vault lid already in place. I / assured the workers I would not hold them up for long, but this was the / proper thing to do. The workers gathered around, still eating their / lunch. I poured out my heart and soul. As I preached the workers began to say ‘Amen ,’ ‘Praise the Lord,’ and / ‘Glory’! I preached and I preached, like I’d never preached before; / from Genesis all the way to Revelation. I closed the lengthy service with a prayer and walked to my car. As I / was opening the door and taking off my coat, I overheard one of the / workers saying to another, ‘I ain’t never seen anything like that / before in my life and I’ve been putting in septic tanks for thirty-two / years.’ Unknown Author
Must see Here / I think I need…
Must see Here / I think I need to get a lawyer! These allegations!!!!!!!!! / Are they true? / Stuart you ROCK / Thanks buddy! Great Laughs….....Cheers /
Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg, ‘Hello?’ ‘Hi honey. / This is Daddy. / Is Mommy near the phone?’ *...
Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg, ‘Hello?’ ‘Hi honey. / This is Daddy. / Is Mommy near the phone?’ ‘No, Daddy. / She’s upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Paul.’ After a brief pause, Daddy says, / ‘But honey, you haven’t got an Uncle Paul.’ ‘Oh yes I do, and he’s upstairs in the room with Mommy, / Right now.’ Brief Pause. / ‘Uh, okay then, this is what I want you to do. / Put the phone down on the table, run upstairs / And knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy / That Daddy’s car just pulled into the driveway.’ ‘Okay, Daddy, Just a minute.’ / A few minutes later / The little girl comes back to the phone. ‘I did it, Daddy.’ ‘And what happened, honey?’ * ‘Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming. Then she tripped over the rug, hit her head on the dresser / And now she isn’t moving at all!’ ‘Oh my God!!! What about your Uncle Paul?’ ‘He jumped out of the bed with no clothes on, too. He was all scared and he jumped out of the back window / And into the swimming pool. / But I guess he didn’t know that you took out the water / Last week to clean it. He hit the bottom of the pool and I think he’s dead.’ *Long Pause Longer Pause / Even Longer Pause Then Daddy says, ‘Swimming pool? ........... Is this 486-5731?’ *No, I think you have the wrong number….....
It was late…. a hot summer’s night. I arrived home to a dark, empty house, and a slow walk up the garden path, telling the kids to wa…
It was late…. a hot summer’s night. I arrived home to a dark, empty house, and a slow walk up the garden path, telling the kids to wait in the car until I got a light on. We entered the house and I set about getting the kids ready for bath and bed. Unbenown to me, someone had followed me into the house. Under the cover of darkness he had been lurking in the garden and used my tired state to assist him in entering my safe little home. / And he was about to make his presence felt. The back of my neck prickled and I rubbed it, thinking my shirt label was annoying me. Nothing there. Then I felt it. He put his arms up my shirt and ran his fingers down my spine. / I froze. His small hairy hands tickled my back, gently, tenderly. Deceptive. I called my son for help. / “I think I have something in my shirt,” I said, “Can you check?” / I held up the back of my shirt and he took one look, screamed and ran from the room. Does the colloquial expression “I damn near shit myself” spring to mind? / (I promise I did not..er…do that….... but there was a bit of a frantic leap in the air and a strange dance…....arms flapping….as I had to separate this huntsman spider from my person! LOL / But then, I did the right thing and put this big hairy guy back out in the garden where he belonged, unharmed…... though maybe he was as scarred by his experience as I was!!!
Sense of Humor please ;) / I heard somewhere….........I forget where…........In order to get your “whore” name or your “porn” name, t…
Sense of Humor please ;) / I heard somewhere….........I forget where…........In order to get your “whore” name or your “porn” name, that you have to use the name of your first pet and the name of the first street you lived on….....er the first street you can remember…..........so my whore name is KITTY HECKER…........what is yours ? For men and Women…..........
Sheep pong – well they do, but this is NOT what you’re expecting! / ...
Sheep pong – well they do, but this is NOT what you’re expecting!
Received this in an email this afternoon and tho…
Received this in an email this afternoon and thought I’d share…... / LOL!!! :D As the two friends wandered through the snow on their way home, Piglet grinned to himself, thinking how lucky he was to have a best friend like Pooh. Pooh thought to himself….........”If the pig sneezes, he’s fucken dead…...”
1 You can get chocolate. / 2 Chocolate satisfies even when It’s gone soft. / 3 You can safely have chocolate while driving. / 4 You can m…
1 You can get chocolate. / 2 Chocolate satisfies even when It’s gone soft. / 3 You can safely have chocolate while driving. / 4 You can make chocolate last as long as you want. / 5 You can have chocolate in front of your mother. / 6 If you bite the nuts too hard the chocolate won’t mind. / 7 Two people of the same sex can have chocolate,with-out being called nasty names. / 8 The word commitment won’t scare off chocolate. / 9 You can have chocolate at your desk,with-out offending workmates. / 10 You can ask a stranger for chocolate with-out getting your face slapped. / 11 You don’t get hairs in your mouth with chocolate. / 12 “If you love me you’ll swallow” has real meaning with chocolate. / 13 With chocolate there’s no need to fake it. / 14 Chocolate does’nt get you pregnant. / 15 You can have chocolate any time of the month. / 16 Good chocolate is easy to find. / 17 You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can handle. / 18 You are never too young or old to have chocolate. / 19 When you have chocolate you do’nt wake the neighbours. / 20 With chocolate, size does’nt matter. / 21 You don’t have to beg to have chocolate. / 22 You can have chocolate any-where,with any-one and not go to jail. / 23 Chocolate does’nt keep you awake,yapping after you’ve had it. / 24 You can have chocolate all weekend and still walk OK on Monday. / 25 It’s easy to find 9 inches of chocolate.
Compliments of my friend Alie… Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the c…
Compliments of my friend Alie… Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter. / The man at the counter asked the older boy, “Son, how old are you?” / “Eight,” the boy replied. / The man continued, “do you know what these are used for?” / The boy replied, “not exactly, but they aren’t for me. They’re for him. He’s my brother. He’s four. We saw on TV that if you use these you would be able to swim and ride a bike. Right now, he can’t do either.”
It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 3kg (6.6 lb). The average…
It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach. One human hair can support 3kg (6.6 lb). The average man’s penis is three times the length of his thumb. Human thighbones are stronger than concrete. A woman’s heart beats faster than a man’s. There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet. / Women blink twice as often as men. The average person’s skin weighs twice as much as the brain. / Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still. If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it. Women reading this will be finished now. Men are still busy checking their thumbs.
Did you ever stop and wonder….............. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these pin…
Did you ever stop and wonder….............. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?” Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken there…I’m gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it’s bum.” Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being could eat? Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? If the professor on Gilligan’s Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can’t he fix a hole in a boat? Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don’t point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is? Why does your Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both dogs! What do you call male ballerinas? Can blind people see their dreams? If Wile E. Coyote from the Road Runner had enough money to buy all that ACME stuff, why didn’t he just buy dinner? If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Is Disney Land the only people trap operated by a mouse? Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? / Stop singing and read on …............... Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup? Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window? Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster? have a great weekend / xkc /
Well i found him he is in MY IMAGES!!! / Just some fun to give everyone a smile for the day. / Stuart Chapman...
Well i found him he is in MY IMAGES!!! / Just some fun to give everyone a smile for the day. / Stuart Chapman / Let the games begin buddy!! “Stuart always trying to get in my images. Here at Birch Tree Alley“ / “Here he is popping up right as I was about to shoot this shot.“ / “Oh and I am not kidding give him a few beers and he will do anything.“ / “Now he is just out of control“ / “Um Can’t explain it…....and don’t remember it.“ / “And his favortie image of all time.“ / “I swear he is a Kangaroo“ / Stuart Chapman’s Leap Of Faith / “He is Everywhere“ /
NSFW
A couple of friends passed this link on to me recently. You’ll find it quite amusing if you are a designer, as you’ll no doubt find somet…
A couple of friends passed this link on to me recently. You’ll find it quite amusing if you are a designer, as you’ll no doubt find something in there to relate to. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VfprIxNfCjk Ps. There’s a bit of swearing in there, so watch with care if you’re at work or have young ones around.
Got in my e-mail today from Charlena , Thanks for making my day! AN ACTUAL CRAIG’S LIST PERSONALS AD To the Guy Who Tried to Mug …
Got in my e-mail today from Charlena , Thanks for making my day! AN ACTUAL CRAIG’S LIST PERSONALS AD To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last Date: 2009-05-27, 1:43 a.m. E.S.T. I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend’s purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message. First, I’d like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn’t expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 ..45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head … isn’t it?! I know it probably wasn’t fun walking back to wherever you’d come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I’m sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again]. After I called your mother, or “Momma” as you had her listed in your cell, I explained t / he entire episode of what you’d done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go’s, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!] I then threw your wallet into the big pink “pimp mobile” that was parked at the curb … after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver’s side of the car. Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what ’s going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA’s office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.). In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you … but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you’ve chosen to pursue in life. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day! Thoughtfully yours, Alex P.S. Remember this motto … An armed society makes for a more civil society!
...
Wishing Tree Christmas Card Series / Little Profiles Christmas Series / Angel Christmas Cards / Nativity Christmas Cards / Other Christmas Cards / Party Girl Card Series /
SAYING GOODBYE TO MOTHER You Don’t Have To Own A Cat To Appreciate This One! You don’t even have to like ‘em! We were dressed an…
SAYING GOODBYE TO MOTHER You Don’t Have To Own A Cat To Appreciate This One! You don’t even have to like ‘em! We were dressed and ready to go out for the New Years Eve Party. We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parakeet and put the cat in the backyard. / We phoned the local cab company and requested a taxi.. The taxi arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house. The cat we put out in the yard, scoots back into the house. We didn’t want the cat shut in the house because she always tries to eat the bird. / My wife goes out to the taxi, while I went inside to get the cat. The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn’t want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. So, she explains to the taxi driver that I will be out soon, ‘He’s just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother.’ / A few minutes later, I get into the cab. ‘Sorry I took so long,’ I said, as we drove away. ‘That stupid bitch was hiding under the bed. I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! She tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked! I hauled her fat ass downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!’ / The cab driver hit a parked car.
RedBubble is a great place to find art, design, photos and writing from over 80,000 talented people.
On stunning greeting cards, awesome t-shirts or beautiful prints to hang on your walls.
It’s really simple. If you’re not happy with your purchase for any reason, we’ll fix it.
Since February 2007 we’ve shipped over 294,200 items to more than 70 countries around the world.
Sign up for your free account, upload your work, join some groups and share your creative genius with the world.