Hi all! Been feeling rather depressed from a few things these last few days and logging on and looking at new work and the comments I …
Hi all! Been feeling rather depressed from a few things these last few days and logging on and looking at new work and the comments I get on my work and sales! (woohoo!!! sold cards of Doll02 and Lookout 04) has helped me get through the day. Thanks to everyone that has been following up on PINGPONG that Kookylane and my work. I do appreciate it. Thanks to zee1 and to everyone else who I dont know that has purchased my stuff, I hope you’re happy with it. If you tell me who are I’d love to thank you personally. This is a fantastic community and it’s always a pleasure going through work both from old and new Bubblers. This place has always made me feel welcome and happy. Just felt like saying thanks.
Hi Everyone .... Well It’s been a long time since I sat here and wrote a little about myself like I used to. In a way this is yet ano…
Hi Everyone .... Well It’s been a long time since I sat here and wrote a little about myself like I used to. In a way this is yet another of those updates, only at this point I am angry beyond belief. Maybe that is when I write the best? A quick Health update which I should have done a long time ago. At this stage I am taking two different Anti Depressants and seeing a Psychologist and a Psychiatrist!! Mentally I am not the best which I guess most of you would have figured from my here again – not here again presence in the Bubble. Some would know I lost my job in May due to a Lung Disease. I have had one specialist Appointment about that and am due to have another follow up appointment in early Oct. As of now I find it nearly impossible to do any physical work for any long period of time. As such I need to re-learn how to do normal everyday things in stints. I am finding that hard to come to terms with, but I will get there. Being a small rural town my chances of work here while I am sick (I also get pretty sick late evening to late mornings) are pretty slim. Money wise I now have maxed out my Credit Card. I have never been in this position before, I have always had a little savings and a regular weekly income, so at this stage I am very stressed out living day to day. Why do all the big bills like insurance and rates always come at the same time? I will get past all this. In regards to what is going on with my Ex. This is why I am so angry today. I while ago I had to change from paying a solicitor to getting legal Aid because I could no longer afford a solicitor. The new Solicitor had a meeting with me in Early July and that went really well. Going through Legal Aid now as well, I set it up so that my Ex and I could go to a Mediation Session before anything legal was done in the hopes that we could come to some arrangement that way. My new solicitor requested a few more documents from me at our meeting and would let me know when mediation (if indeed my ex agreed to it) would be taking place. I have written to my Solicitor twice since that meeting regarding extra documents and let him know if there was anything else he required not to hesitate in letting me know. I haven’t heard anything from him since the meeting. I would have assumed that he and I would have met or spoke at least once more before Mediation took place, so I was just thinking it was a slow process and waited. At the meeting he asked me when I would like to be moved back to Victoria and I said at least from Xmas. So … these things take time obviously. Last night I lay awake in bed till about 6am this morning. I had terrible reflux (apparently due to my lung disease) and didn’t feel very well at all. I finally fell asleep sometime after 6am. I remember waking once to the sound of the phone ringing, but because I was so tired just went back to sleep not thinking much about it. When I got up today I found that I had 5 messages on my mobile phone. Obviously someone needed to talk to me so I checked them right away. It was Legal aid Asking why I wasn’t at the Mediation that had been set up for 9.30am today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I may not be the brightest light bulb in the pack … but in order to have been at a meeting I think it would have been nice to have been told about it in advance!!! Not only now does this work against me in regards to why I am still here in WA fighting a woman who shouldn’t be getting what she says she wants …. but I would fairly say it has blown any chance I have at all now of reasoning with her. :( I wish I could sue all those involved now for all the stress and depression I have suffered leading up to this point … only now to be in this situation. I really feel now I have no chance at all of getting anything that I feel would be fair for me. Basically now I am way back at the point where she suddenly popped up again and said she wanted half the profits from the sale when I sold my house. I don’t know if I can go through all that again :( Angry? You bet I am and disappointed and depressed and confused and lost. What will I do? Mope for a few hours … then live day by day again. I have a Psychiatrist coming around to see me at 3pm. Poor bugger, he is going to cope it all :(
So when I woke up this morning I was a little depressed. My roomate forgot my Birthday… Oh well the older you get the less it matters…
So when I woke up this morning I was a little depressed. My roomate forgot my Birthday… Oh well the older you get the less it matters or maybe it matters more. Who knows but it was so awesome to come here though and get bubblemail wishing me a Happy Birthday! Seriously guys you made my day! I love you guys! You know who you are…. xoxoxoxo… xoxoxo
/ / / image title – the inner sanctum Manic Reflections . . . One day i awakened to a simply sweet, “I heart you!” message on my bathroom mirror. Days later, a bi-polar/manic/sleep-deprived version of me impulsively grabbed my camera, tripod, trusty remote and started striking poses in my mirror. Wishing to immortalize the i heart you message, in some way, before zapping it with Mr. Windex! So . . . i crouched up on my counter, gradually getting closer and closer to the mirror. It was wonderfully strange, surreal and comical – as i carefully attempted to seat myself in the bathroom sink . . . while the rest of me perched perilously on the bathroom counter. Purging my manic energy, creatively, provided me with a sense of relief and surrender. After this series was photographed, i went on to photograph two more, in my studio. It was after the photographing of the three, separate series – that i was finally able to slip toward slumber. So what follows are manic reflections . . . partake and enjoy :) / image title – another version of me / image title – the sensual realm / image title – the chameleon / image title – the mirror speaks / image title – fragile / image title – the confrontation / image title – inward bound Bi-polarities . . . Around 18 it started to sink in that something not-quite-right was going on in my frantic mind. As I was always struggling to pay attention in school . . . i also became aware that i would get these incredible highs, feeling euphoric, invincible, on top of the world – no matter what my actual reality was . . . everything was grandiose! These manic episodes usually lasted about 2 weeks, followed by the worst lows which often lasted months. In a depressive state everything was life and death, everyday problems became overwhelming, i just wanted to crawl into a quiet, dark corner and simply cease to exist. Then there were those inbetween states where i guess i would be what was considered “normal” though to me these inbetween states felt like emotional flat-lining, i felt kind of numb – being so used to the extreme emotions i felt most of the time. When i was younger, my manic episodes were amazing, accompanied by feelings of invincibility, euphoria and pseudo-bliss. I would feel on top of the world! Now, these manic episodes are more dark and frenetic in nature. And i find myself craving the sleep these manic episodes deprive me of. It’s hard to stay on schedule/task when i go day, after day – without sleep. I don’t have more energy when i am manic, i am just more hyper and restless, unable to slow down – which creates the illusion of high energy . . . inside my body and mind are crying out for sleep. It would take another 12 years before i learned how to manage these intense moodswings, learned to go with the flow and how to keep my head above water – no matter what my mood. There were years of self-destructive coping methods and soul numbing medications. Eventually i decided to approach my bi-polarity from a spiritual/holistic perspective. I decided to go vegan and stopped consuming foods loaded with additives/preservatives. I learned about behavioral management, structure, meditation/yoga, prayer, daily spiritual renewal and daily exercise. Putting all of these things into practice, over time . . . allowed me to utilize my moods creatively AND constructively. beingnormalisoverrated JAEDA! / /
“ I think my Daddy’s going to die” she said. I had found her standing by herself staring out the glass door at the back of my house, m…
“ I think my Daddy’s going to die” she said. I had found her standing by herself staring out the glass door at the back of my house, maybe watching the trees, maybe not really seeing anything. “I know, sweety” I said. “Your Daddy is very sick, and he might die, but they are trying to fix him at the hospital” / I did not know what else to say. Her big brown eyes fixed on mine, unblinking. / “It’s because of the alcohol, he drinks too much alcohol”. Stunned, I did not know what to say. For a child so young, she had seen too many things, and had worked out a lot for herself. “Two drinks is okay” she said, wisely nodding to herself “but more than that makes you sick. It’s not good to have more than that.” My heart broke for her. Yet she did not seem sad. Somehow, that was what made it worse. She was totally accepting of the situation, it was like it was an everyday experience to be taken on, worked though and discarded. For me, the whole situation had shocked me and filled me with grief. / I had followed the ambulance from town, on my way home from work. The sight of an ambulance, lights flashing, on its way along the highway towards my farm home, was an unusual one, and it filled me with dread. / “Please turn off. Please don’t be someone in my family” I silently prayed as I drove behind it. There were not many homes along that stretch of road, as it was mainly farmland. I felt ashamed for hoping it was someone other than my family. Then the ambulance turned into my neighbour’s driveway. / My heart thumped. A young couple with young kids – not a good sign; worse still, a man who had succumbed to depression after losing his mother, his grandmother and a friend in the past year, and more recently having lost his job and dealing with relationship troubles. I had felt his pain before and it was vast. These were people I cared about, I so desired to help, yet it seemed impossible to know where to begin. Sometimes friendship seems such a small and helpless thing against the demons that haunt people’s lives Neighbours were running across the paddock at the sight of the ambulance. The son stood at the door, white face, showing the ambos in and leading them to…… A man, OD’d on the bedroom floor. Purple… foaming at the mouth ………… dying. The fourteen year old boy, traumatized, quivering in shock, tells me had been at home with his little sister and the phone had rung. He had taken it up to his stepdad’s room to give him the call, and found him like that. His eyes were haunted, the tears quivered right there, he all but broke down and I prepared myself to hug him, but then something hauled him back and he blocked it. His Mum was home now, it would be all right. “Help me get your little sister’s clothes and school things” I said to him, “and she can come home with me for the night. I will take care of her and get her to school tomorrow. That will make it easier for your Mum”. The little girl was wandering around the house totally oblivious to the drama unfolding, telling everyone who would listen / “My daddy hurt himself. He had an accident.” The boy handed me a school bag and one pair of pants. He could not focus, could not think. He did not know what to do. I told him I would take care of it, give his sister my own daughter’s clothes….it would be okay. I asked if he would like to come with us, but he said no. He wanted to stay with his Mum. I wanted to hug him, but he had a barrier up that seemed to preclude anyone coming close to comfort him. I plucked up the courage and walked back up to the bedroom. I did not look down. I tried to block the sight of the ambulance officers, working on the body on the floor. I caught the eye of the woman, my friend and neighbour, and just said “I am taking your daughter home with me, to help you out…..” But she did not hear, her face white and distressed staring blankly across the room at me. So the little girl happily got in my car as if it was the greatest adventure ever. She was the same age as my daughter and they were school friends. All she could think about was staying with Maya. It was going to be fun. I was amazed at the resilience of small children, how they could seemingly shed the horror of things they had witnessed and just play. What a blessing it was that they could “just play”. I was holding back tears and shock at what had just taken place in that home, yet this little girl could only think about what fun she was going to have. But now, a few hours later, she had played for a while, the novelty was over, and reality had set in. She had wandered to a place by herself as her little mind tried to come to terms with what was happening. “I think my Daddy’s going to die”.
Don’t wanna post a writing, as i’m not really a writer.. so i’d post this as a journal instead.. It’s kinda like a lyric.. Inspired by a …
Don’t wanna post a writing, as i’m not really a writer.. so i’d post this as a journal instead.. It’s kinda like a lyric.. Inspired by a malay song, Di Pintu Mahligai (At the Palace’s Gate), by an old malay band, iklim. Wrote this 9 Sep 2006.. i dedicated this to a friend i’ve lost, Brown .. / At Heaven’s Gate / My world turn silent, / Since the day you left. / And the pain is killing me slowly, / Each time i recall the day i couldn’t find you, / And i remember the night we last met.. / / You were so possessive, / So unwilling to leave, / So unwilling to let me go.. / You told me your fears, / I felt it, yet i brush it off.. / / I won’t forget your voice, / Asking me to stay.. / I won’t forget the look in your eyes, / Telling me “don’t go…” / / Now with my imaginary wings, / I wish i could fly over to you, / To tell you how much i love you, / To tell you how much i miss you.. / / I scream to the gates of heaven, / Can you hear me, my friend? / I scream for you to take me with you, / To free me from this pain.. / / I scream to the gates of heaven, / I need to see your face again, / I need to hear your voice again, / To tell me that everything is alright, / That you’ll always be here with me.. / / I scream to the gates of heaven, / Can you hear me, my friend? / Will you wait for me by the bridge? / I need to see you for one last time, / To tell you my love, / To tell you my goodbyes, / i miss you… fa
It’s dark inside my head lately. The ugly black-dog is winning. I have put up with its ugly presence for over 35 years now and would choo…
It’s dark inside my head lately. The ugly black-dog is winning. I have put up with its ugly presence for over 35 years now and would choose to be free, whole, sane, and normal whatever that is. / It brings one down from the simplest of life’s joys like laughing at something funny, being bothered to get out of the house into the fresh air, doing that thing that is staring at you to be done, but just seems too much for you to achieve. / What helps, pills – sometimes! / People saying: Just get over it – no. / Alcohol – no. / Understanding – to a point. / Hugs – always. / The desire to simply not exist is strong, but I am stronger. Relief in a coffin, while seeming attractive, I know presents no answer. I don’t fear death, in many ways I wouldn’t mind at all, but to achieve that by my own hand is not acceptable. / So I must endure, somehow managing to push through for another 30 or so years – a miserable thought, but, if I keep writing about it, then just maybe I will encourage another to fight on too.
I have read out there there are many suffering depression as I do. Not only those but the people about them who care for someone who suff…
I have read out there there are many suffering depression as I do. Not only those but the people about them who care for someone who suffers. / Being the generous helpful soul that I am, I feel compelled to help by offering what I have learned and developed for my own solutions, and encouraging others to read it and help themselves find their own solutions. I am fortunate and have worked hard to retrain my brain and try to control the dark thoughts like non-depressed people do. I have not taken drugs feeling that to just be a cop out, a diluting of the problem not a cure and in such dilution the acuteness of the triggers are not discovered or dealt with. Instead I have sought counselling and from the multitudes of sessions have reasoned out my own re-education of my thoughts and these are the tools I learned developed and use. I have written them out and over the months posted them in my folio but to make hunting them easier I have collated them here for any sufferer’s to read and use if they feel they help. Please read the comments too for in these there are other helpful information from other artists. Firstly to tell my story of where I became lost and why. There are deeper darker reasons that I have not chosen to share here in the bubble but these were the crucial ones: / Fragile / Paying Dues / Addicted The best tools I have found are: / Rings of Living / 10 Guidelines / Frank” was the poem that started me writing poetry as a focus. / These next two journal entries was to give the lyrics to the two best songs that I felt helped me through my tough times - / In Your Silence was my son’s band’s only song. [my son was the drummer] but the song should be the most heard for depression sufferers and for all the casualties of the depression victims. / Misty Mountains Calling Me helped me to walk away from my children time after time and to decipher what friendship really was. My own Validation, that is my acceptance of what I do best and what sustains me in spite of all attempts of others to belittle it, is written in these poems: / Oralist / My Beast / Creating My Dark Poems are here – you may realise that I cover my sadness with happiness brilliantly on most occasions but sometimes I just give way to writing out the transparency of that happiness. / Growth Gap / Looking Out / sit / Take a Breath / My Journey In redbubble I write poetry or prose or stories prompted by other’s art work. Sometimes it takes a while for the words to gather and then boom! But other times I feel compelled to write on first sight and end up writing it in the comment box beneath the art I’m viewing. You can tell when it hits me from the thumbnail picture I favour the work AFTER I comment! :O) I always feel worried that I am imposing or something on another’s work yet if they didn’t like what I wrote they can delete it! But then validation comes in the forms of people liking what I do to such an extent that they include my words on their work – such an honour – Sun Symphony that Jerry Alcantara added to his published book and Soft the Dawn that Mary Campbell added to a poster; are two that have been printed for publication and thus purchase [details can be found through the links in my work] and I am so thrilled to think that my words are so well liked :O) / And then this tribute: / I wrote this poem I can be Pretty Too! inspired by a bubbler’s art and received a verse in my comment box which I then added to my poem I can be Pretty Two that taught me the elation of the honour of inspiring another artist. And to ease the pains I have included these two “Healing” sort of poems. / Drifting into Peace / Rejuvenate your Soul But the strongest depression killer is ACTION! Mundane boring action which achieves a small reward – doing the dishes, weeding the lawn, vacuuming etc … And I hate to say it folks who help us depression sufferers – “Sometimes, NO Help is MORE Help than Help!” perhaps you can just leave us alone [provided we are safe]. Don’t necessarily leave us but don’t talk to us let us talk to you. A big part of depression is embarrassment, frustration that we allow this overload of emotion to swamp us. When we do come out of it we need reassurance that we are not monsters for feeling overwhelmed by ourselves. The last thing we need is belittlement. Things like “Don’t be so silly” or “Snap out of it” etc, just feeds it! If we could “Stop it!” WE WOULD! But Validation is the cure. We who suffer depression for what ever individual combination of environmental stimulation we all suffer depression because we have been conditioned in the past to feel invalid. / I am a believer of inherited personality traits and inherited memory. I see in my sons, who have nothing to do with their biological fathers whatsoever, the same philosophies the same personality and the same ideas. I feel the history I read is Familiar to me. I see in my mother and what I know of my grand and great grand mother’s the same responses I have to situations. Yes most of that is learned behaviour but why does my siblings not do the same? We have the same parents? I have two brothers who display similar tendencies to depression as me but they deal with it differently, one has the money to take the pills and see the best therapists, the other wears it as a badge! Our mother is in complete denial that she has it! But I disagree with the experts who call it a mental disease! We are not sick! Yes we can take drugs that help us to conform with social levels of mental behaviour. I once read that there is a fine line between genius and insanity. And most of the depressive people I have met are highly creative in some way. Could we depressives not be the descendants of the artists and bards of old? And as such now that society does not value the arts in our education system [it is usually the first to receive cut backs in favour of sport or science] in our employment sector either – writers musicians and artists have no section in the employment categories at the dole office. Funnilly enough Crafts people [potters weavers etc] Dancers and actors do! Yet any money made will happilly create an unemployment benefits debt! / But it is the common people who hurt the most when you try to validate yourself, especially as a writer. A conversation could go like this - / ‘So what do you do?’ / ‘I am a writer’ / ‘What books have you written then? Would I have read any?’ / ‘I’m not published yet, but I write …’ / ‘Well then you are not a writer you only think you are so you can cop out of doing real work!’ Yes I know all throughout history since after the medieval times artists have always struggled for money BUT we have always been respected for the creativity we produce. And to show how fickle the contemporary common people are, the conversation above would have ended in the complete opposite if I had’ve been in print! It’s as if nowadays you cannot be what you are until you have made money from it! My validation is in my ability to write and to advocate for children [and the underprivileged] and to sing! I do many many other things equally as well but I prefer to give my efforts to these three vocations. Yet none of them will give me an established recognised income to be respected for! I have to go out and peddle myself and create an income before I am allowed to be acknowledged in the vocation! The other think we depression sufferers MUST do is find our triggers! No it won’t necessarily be directly connected to our validation desires and every person has their own trigger or combination of triggers. / Mine are money, bureaucratic red tape over income gets me every time, and to a more intrinsic crucial extent my children – if seeing them is in any way threatened or jeopardized I cannot breathe! Physical abuse is nothing in comparison to those two triggers! Put them together and I am incapable of breathing moving thinking or anything! But it is NOT an immediate fix! Like grief depression takes time to control. I equate it to “One month per year depressed, one year per decade to get back in control” So if you were depressed from a trauma twelve years ago then expect it to take a year and two months to recover and be in control again. Having said that it will NEVER be gone! We are people who delve deeply into our emotions and as such sometimes are overwhelmed by them. What we learn to do is curb and control and avoid situations that trigger our intense emotions so that we can live productively along side others that we need. The only reason I advocate for doing this is because in our intensity we can hurt others, the loved ones around us who do not understand what has gone wrong, and that is not good … it also harms ourselves like drinking smoking etc, but so long as it does no harm to others … then what should stop our own choices for ourselves? Just remember abusers of alcohol/drugs/gamboling apart from physically destroys the abuser’s health only harms others who are in contact with the abuser [physical & emotional casualties] or dependent upon the abuser’s money [which of course they use on drink not rent bills food etc] Where as cigarettes by their very presence of being smoked, inconsiderately always invade other’s with polluting the air needed for all to breathe, [ and remember the pollutants are more toxic than the smoke] and leaving the rubbish of their ash and butts all over the place! Ever seen a driver flick his still lit butt out the window of his car or empty out his ash tray on the road? what about those who stand about doorways smoking to drop the butt on the ground and if they’re bored will grind it into the pavement with their foot or if they couldn’t be bothered with that they leave it to roll off still smoking into the gutter or onto someone else’s shoe. [If they see it my children pick the butts up run after the smoker and give them back with “Sorry you dropped this.”] If anyone flicks a butt in my presence I flick them! Smokers are inconsiderate and are lazy litter-bugs they have no care for anyone around them but themselves. The only reason Smoking is not illegal like drug taking is because the governments make an awful lot of income from the taxes on them! Even if they do dispose of their butts thoughtfully what of the air? NOT exhaling defeats the purpose of inhaling! / A very clever practitioner and motivationer, Doctor John Tickell, once stated “Now days it is impossible to be intelligent and a smoker at the same time!” / I stated this in a University Tute once and was argued down by the 5 classmates and the tutor who smoked …. But the next tute session 4 out of the 5 students quietly said to me that they had now stopped smoking because they had thought about what I had told them and realised I and John Tickell were right. / The best was the tutor who announced in the tute she had seen the errors of her ways and degrees and post grads and all sorts of other qualifications meant nothing if she continued to smoke and make a mockery of her intelligence! What a sweet victory that was! Especially as she rewarded us all with packets of lollies that she bought with her smoke money instead! :O) But I digress [I always do! another depressive trait I fear lol :O)] So if any of the work I have collated above can help with what you or your friends / loved ones are experiencing then please feel free to use them as you see fit! / But I re-iterate these are just my tools that I have developed that have worked for me and I am no authority or credited counsellor in any way! I’m just a sufferer with many years experience of helping myself and others :O) My motto too is “Nil Despiradum Illigitimus Carborundum!” [Don’t let the bastard grind you down!] Keep Happy! :O)
Tropical Depression Edouard Clouds is featured in the group Both Sides Now – wooooooohoooooo!! !http://images-1.redbubble.net/img/art/...
Tropical Depression Edouard Clouds is featured in the group Both Sides Now – wooooooohoooooo!! Tropical Depression Edouard Clouds Thank you Cometman and AnneG, hosts of Both Sides Now!! Glenna
i think i can never apologise and thank enough.. To all those who’ve been there for me during my disappearance, who’ve been worried for m…
i think i can never apologise and thank enough.. To all those who’ve been there for me during my disappearance, who’ve been worried for me, asking for me.. thank you so so much for your concern. thank you so so so much.. as some might have noticed, i sorta almost totally disappeared frm here last 1-2 weeks.. the reason is that it might just be because i changed my eating med timing.. i used to have it after i wake up from sleep. start Sep, i had it before sleep (no thanks to fasting period). i also realised i accidentally missed my doc appt earlier this month, which means my med’s running out. but don’t worry! i got my fresh batch of med already.. n_n” basically i haven’t been able to comment and fav on all the wonderful pieces that everyone’s been uploading, cos i was too troubled, i don’t wanna give a half hearted comment. i love the works, so i really wanna comment and fav them when i’m feeling ok and can give my most sincere comments.. =D i also wanna thank the buyer of Chibi Frazzle tee and S.T.F.U tee! Thank you so so much to the mystery buyers!! =D i also made some sales over at Zazzle.. / Thank you Morin and Christopher for purchasing Chibi Fraz Bday card... / Thank you Jose, for purchasing Nobody Loves Me T-Shirt / Thank you so so muchie to Midori-sama for requesting and purchasing Hug? button !! =D / And thank you Ariel for purchasing Sobs… T-Shirt / I also wanna especially thank Lisa, Karin and Ellen for their lovely lovely comments on the keds i recently did at my zazzle shop .. i actually did those to distract me from the problems i have at home.. eheh.. n_n” but seriously, thank you all so so much for the lovely comments!! i was feeling waaaaay unloved and hated, and the comments really makes me smile despite the pain in my chest.. X)
Eheh.. sorry am late.. but, i think most of you guys out there have read the journal written by Karin...
Eheh.. sorry am late.. but, i think most of you guys out there have read the journal written by Karin about Clinical Depression and my new gallery here in RB? ^ _ ^“ Eheh.. yea, i just started a new gallery here as SilentCries... it’s sorta supposed to be a place where i’ll upload some of my darker “angsty” pieces and writings.. so those used to Tim and my lil animal friends here might not be able to accept my writings or drawing there.. so i was rather hesitant and scared to announce or tell anyone about it.. i was worried you guys might find me scary or think of me as a freak or something. i started SilentCries mainly because i don’t want to keep them in me.. i don’t want to just keep my pain with me.. i wanna put it up and share it with anyone who might be interested to look at it.. i also want those who might be in the same situation as me to know that they are not alone. scary disturbing drawings and thoughts.. i have them too.. so i hope people who might be in similar situation as me will feel less isolated and alone.. i hope i can help them express what they feel with my drawings or writings.. i love all the wonderful friends i’ve made here and at Zazz as frozenfa.. so i was worried that if you guys see that other side of me, i’d scare you guys away, i’d lose the friends i have.. but then again, the works in SilentCries are a part of me as well. so basically, am perfectly ok with anyone who might not want to be associated with me over at SilentCries, but i truly hope you guys won’t be afraid and avoid me here as well.. Love and Hugs~ /
I don’t know about the rest of you guys on here but I believe that Karin Taylor is a very important person. Karin is a great artist / ...
I don’t know about the rest of you guys on here but I believe that Karin Taylor is a very important person. Karin is a great artist / Karin welcomes new artists and makes them feel at home / Karin helps people with computer technical stuff / Karin is brave / Karin is the bubblers guru / Karin is wise beyond words / Karin is encouraging / Karin takes on eveyone else’s stuff and gets overloaded / Sometimes she crashes her wings get too heavy with stuff Karin is a hero / When I was under attack Karin came out fighting for me, she didn’t even know what was happening she just believed in me / Karin we believe in you I believe in you You are so much more and so many people love you / Karin is a big heart beating here on redbubble / without Karin this place would never be as welcoming and exciting / Redbubble take care of Karin / Make sure we don’t loose her / we can’t afford to loose her / Karin is really important Karin Taylor we love you
50 to 100 views and 10 to 18 comments, in 11 months is not inspiring. I’m a beginner, but I’m sure my paintings are not that bad. D…
50 to 100 views and 10 to 18 comments, in 11 months is not inspiring. I’m a beginner, but I’m sure my paintings are not that bad. Does anyone have any suggestions, on how to get a more inspiring response?
Ummm.. hello…. O.O” To all who’ve been worried about me, i’m so so so sorry!! i know i can’t apologize enough for my weird disappear…
Ummm.. hello…. O.O” To all who’ve been worried about me, i’m so so so sorry!! i know i can’t apologize enough for my weird disappearance from RB, and my lack of replies on all your wonderful comments.. and also my lack of comments.. i’m truly truly sorry. I’ve been basically down all these time, since September.. down.. sorta down, yea.. umm.. how do i explain.. umm.. ok, i’ll write a from the start thing, so this journal will be lengthy so yea.. Oo” Basically i once had a major major breakdown last Sep 2007. it was pretty bad. i sooooo wanted to have myself admitted into the hospital to get away from life and to avoid hurting anyone. i was that close to really hurting someone.. in my mind, i was fighting and struggling not to harm anyone. not to harm myself. i was presented with horrible ugly images of how i wanted to really really really hurt the someone who’s hurting me mentally and emotionally. but my brother managed to get home on time to save me. God bless him. So what happened in 2008 this year was that.. i managed to last through the past 1yr with no more major breakdowns.. i’ve worked hard and i’ve managed to control myself enough not to have any breakdown for a year. and i was proud of myself. until a few days after the 1yr anniversary that that same someone said something nasty again and voila, there goes my clean records of no major breakdowns~ pfft.. Someone you truly care for and respect and love suggested that i behave properly or i’d be caught by the mental hospital and dragged away and locked up.. it’s basically a big huge insult and jab to me.. biiiiiiiig.. it’s like.. “what the hell makes her think i’d go into hysteria?!” big.. it’s like a vampire being stabbed in the heart big. it’s sorta, the worst words i’ve heard.. i couldn’t ask for anything more blunt. it’s as good as saying, “watch it, mad woman. you’ll be caught one day”. oooO.. typing this brings back the pain on my chest.. annoying.. the last tv drama didn’t help educate that lady either. the drama suggested that anyone having depression will go into hysteria and will attempt to kill themselves and will be full of anxiety and hysteria stuffs.. honestly, receiving such comments makes me wanna try just do that and give her what she wants. but stubborn lil me won’t give her what she wants. she’ll have to work harder at tormenting me mentally if she wants me to go into hysteria. So yea.. basically after that hurtful episode, i sorta thought i managed to get over it, but i thought wrong i guess. i tried to get back on RB, to comment and fav works.. but i couldn’t do much cos i’ve been feeling moody. i don’t want to leave a half-hearted comment – especially when i know that i’d be responding to the piece for cheerfully if i weren’t feeling moody. i’ve received so many kind bmails and emails from you guys.. Midori-sama.. Ellen.. Lisa.. Christelle.. Lori.. iAN.. Tom.. Julie.. Rory.. Gillian.. Vestque.. GG.. argh!!! there’s so many of you lovely people out there bmailing and commenting and being so nice to me, i’m so sorry for disappearing!! there’s so many kind comments on my SilentCries gallery too!! You guys are too kind!! am not complaining, but really really really thank you all!! i’m so sorry i haven’t manage to reply to you guys.. Basically i’ve been feeling moody, and can’t bring myself to reply.. i am not my usual cheerful childish self, and i’d feel bad to tell you guys am not ok cos i think it’s not too big a problem still and yet it held me down so much.. Basically i planned to reply to all the comments and bmails and emails only after i’ve gotten myself back up. OO” i am so so sorry.. i know i must have worried some of you guys.. though seriously, there’s no need to worry for me, am nothing! as in.. there’s no need to worry for me.. how do i say this.. i’ve dealt with crappy people all my life, so i will be ok. i will not go into hysteria, i will not be dragged away in straight jacket, i will not kill myself and i will not kill others. cough cough.. i would like to thank Karin for reminding me that i haven’t been replying to anything for a long time and that includes personal bmails and emails.. i honestly didn’t realize i’ve been withdrawing myself. i just thought i’m just procrastinating to answering bmails and emails.. I’ve been drawing and playing on my wacom the last 3days.. immersing myself into drawing and sketching, hoping to purge out any negative feelings in me. here’s my first try at sketching with wacom.. / it’s really fun.. and now i’m trying to color with a wacom.. will show you guys once it’s done.. it’s a little guy, by the name of Kenny… he’s very young and very quiet.. he cries easily. he loves to be carried and hugged. X) he’ll be done a 2-3 days i guess.. To those who love silly lil jokes, my bro helped came up with the words for these two tees (will make them available here soon i guess).. / / Last but not least, thank you so so much to the mystery buyer of SUSHI!!! / sold on 7th Oct Major Thank You to JakkiO for purchasing Paint Yourself! Card / And Thank You to the latest mystery buyer of I Love Me – Have You Loved Yourself Today? Card!! / Thank you so much to RB for featuring I Love Me – Have You Loved Yourself Today? in the Art section!! X)
Hello all Black Dog owners, In Australia Black Dog is a euphemism for depression. It is a condition that affects up to 1 in 10 people …
Hello all Black Dog owners, In Australia Black Dog is a euphemism for depression. It is a condition that affects up to 1 in 10 people and does not discriminate between sex, race, age, geographic location, intellect or ability – the dog simply sniffs you out and adopts you whether you like it or not. Depression is a condition that is derided by many that don’t understand it and sadly, the odds are high that someone close to you suffers it. Depression can be caused by many things, life experience, chemical imbalances and it can run through families. It is not a condition requiring “a boot in the arse” or tough love like “just stop feeling sorry for yourself” and believe it or not, pointing out that “there are others worse off than yourself” not only shows a lack of understanding , it tends to make us wonder whether you think we are stupid as well. I say “us” because I have suffered depression most of my life, not caused by family, not caused by life experience – it is just there. I don’t want pity, sympathy or a good talking to – I just want you to be aware of it. Good art stimulates an emotional response, whether it be – joy, sadness, fear, love etc. I feel to be able to induce these emotions in people we need to understand and appreciate these emotions and what causes them. In suffering the lows of depression you come to really appreciate a wider range of emotions in a way many people dont and in effect we are able to utilise this experience to produce the art that says a thousand words (although I think I am probably nearing that number now). I faced a very deep personal abyss recently, so deep I very nearly didn’t escape it. I got out thanks to many of you good people, support from my family and a number of RB friends (you know who you are). Chances are if you are reading this then you have contributed through your support, comments, compliments and encouragement of my work (and thusly me personally). What you may or may not know is that to someone who feels this way just the smallest of kind words or hint of encouragement can make a huge difference. So, in closing I would ask you to consider the following. Chances are you know someone with this potentially fatal condition. To help cure it, you don’t need to be a Psychologist or doctor, a rocket scientist nor philosopher – you don’t even need to have experienced hardship to help, all you need do is listen and be there, give a hug or tell that person they are valuable to you and as Christmas is a time of year that sees more suicides and self harm, more lonliness and isolation please make that effort. If you are suffering please, please put your hand up and ask for help, tell someone, ring Lifeline the Salvation Army, Kids line or talk to a friend, pick out someone on Redbubble that appreciates your work or Bmails you – JUST DONT SUFFER ALONE IN SILENCE. Simon / P.s. help spread this message by FAVOURITING this and sharing this with others.
YESH people!!! FINALLY!!!! Finally, after struggling since last month, trying to get a stall.. FINALLY!!! This monday-wednesday, 22^th…
YESH people!!! FINALLY!!!! Finally, after struggling since last month, trying to get a stall.. FINALLY!!! This monday-wednesday, 22th-24th Dec, 11am – 10pm, Vivo City, Singapore, / Level 3, near Sentosa Express ... Fa will be opening her very first physical stall!!!! / This is like achieving my second milestone – to have my own little cart!! am so happy!!! (the first being starting an online shop and work hard till people like my designs enough to buy them) am more nervous and panicky now, actually, but you get what i mean, hey? it’s like.. after the successful meeting with the people from PaTH i didn’t actually chase them asking when can i start already.. but rather i’ve been like trying my best to juggle a freelance web project, while preparing things i need for the cart.. Then suddenly today, BAM!! i got a text message asking me if i can open my stall next mon-wed. Cos this stalls section is supposed to run only on every first and last weekend of the month. i guess they want to have more stalls around before xmas hey? nothing beats last minute shopping.. / but last minute preparation is freaking me out!! I’ll be pressing some buttons, printing some posters, and Sinli will be helping me with writing the price displays (since i have a terrible handwriting). Yesterday, we just shopped for the hangers and clothes rack.. thank goodness we shopped yesterday.. i also ordered some glasses and dog tags to be made into pendants, but i don’t think i’ll get them till end of the year.. so no necklaces for next week.. i hope my stall looks ok enough.. i don’t have much things to sell yet, it’s very worrying. i only have 8 different tee designs printed.. less than 10magnets and journals and keychains.. 15 buttons.. am thankful i have my friend, Sinli, to help me out.. i am SOOO not going to freak out!! much.. yes yes, will take some photos.. i’m currently spotting lotsa lotsa pimples and fats and terrible dark rings, but heck!! Lastly, big fat thank you to the mystery buyer of Kenny – the baby tortoise / And a thousand apologies for not being around here much these days.. Depression keep crawling into me.. /
Firstly, let me introduce myself. I am a 56 year young woman who lives purely by the experiences that I bring into this life, and likes …
Firstly, let me introduce myself. I am a 56 year young woman who lives purely by the experiences that I bring into this life, and likes to write about what I not only observe but also learn from those experiences in writings such as this one. I have been through some amazingly wonderful experiences and I have been through some hellish ones and as such I have learnt a lot by those experiences. I know depression only too well as well as how feeling, or being, alone can brings ‘things’ to the surface of consciousness. And thanks to God, I know the meaning of understanding Love, not only towards others but also towards my self in the form of self-respect and as a result of that, self-esteem. My ‘insight’ into depression has stemmed from many things in my life. The ‘enforced’ feelings of abandonment as a child which were suppressed and which later surfaced at a time those feelings were meant too. The ‘enforced’ feelings of being violently threatened by a husband who had a penchant for living with a fireman’s axe under our bed for 22 months and telling me he could chop me up into pieces and get away with it with the use of a certain British Law in force at that time and who also brought a gun into our apartment when living in the USA trying to use the same force to gain manipulation and control over me along with the same excuse of being able to get away with it under the same Law which was also in force in America. Along with that also came the ‘enforced’ feelings of betrayal I felt by that loved ones use of adultery, alcoholism and drug abuse both self-inflicted drug abuse, in his case, anything that got him away from his believed problems and psychiatric drugs given to him by doctors & psychiatrists. I did leave him a number of times. I am not a complete idiot but I also forgave him as many times realising his tactics where games of manipulation bought on by his own problems of which he alone has still yet to face. His main problem was that he was a spoilt child. Not spoilt in the meaning of being given whatever he wanted as a child but spoilt in the fact that both his folks worked not that his mother had to but because she liked the social aspect of working. She didn’t want the responsibility of being a mother even though she wanted children. That decision made him feel abandoned as a child, made him feel unloved, made him feel unnoticed and due to the lack of parental guidance gave him no lessons in self-discipline. Spare the rod and spoil the child. An old biblical saying that I believe a lot take as meaning: spoil the child; buy them anything they want, take them anywhere they want, let them do anything they want. To me, it doesn’t mean that at all. To me, that saying means if you spare the rod (discipline – as it means in theological language; not a stick to hit them with) then you do spoil (mar) the child, as you don’t teach them with guidance using self-discipline as the lesson thereby spoiling their chance of having a good life with understanding the benefits of self-discipline. I say ‘enforced’ feelings about the above incidences as, to me, they seemed to be the feelings others were trying to inflict upon me and indeed did at some points of my life when I was led into a very confusing period for 28 years living with an alcoholic adulterer who I loved dearly and don’t to this day regret knowing as I did certainly learn a lot from that wonderful character. I had a lot of experiences with my now ex-husband including the possibility that I have children with him. I say the possibility as it is a situation that included surrogate mothers to carry my fertilised eggs to birth upon which he then had full control over the children. I have never met them but I have been advised that they exist on many occasions when my ex-husband wanted total control over a situation. He use to say something about these “supposed children” but then later he would deny saying anything at all about them telling me I was mad for even thinking there were any children. Regardless of the fact he rang my father from the USA, where he was apparently at that stage living during a hiatus in our relationship, approximately10months after I had an operation where they used an IVF egg pick-up instrument during the operation, and advised my father that he had just become the father of a daughter. My father rang me straight away to tell me about the call he had received from Los Angeles advising me what was said during their conversation and telling me that it was about time I found out what was going on in my life and then promptly hung up on me. It seems neither of them wanted to actually tell me. I had noticed the instruments sitting on the tray that was wheeled over beside me before the anaesthetist administered the drug to put me under. And, I was also shown a photograph of a young pregnant woman who my husband told me had carried his baby. Of course, he has denied telling me anything of the sort and denied showing me the photograph of the young woman adding that I am mad to think anything like that had gone on but of course, when he is drunk I hear the stories of it all over again including a time when we got back together again in Sydney and were sitting in a coffee shop talking about reconciliation for about the eighth time and he asked me how I would feel about being the mother to, at that stage, two young children of which he was the biological father. When I asked where their mother was he advised me they had surrogate mothers. My husband had a saying that he use to say to me often which was ‘with enough money you can buy anyone or anything’. As far as I knew he was not that rich since I was the one working to pay for our living costs whenever we were together so this was another mystery to me about this stranger that I had allowed myself to marry as I wondered where he got the money from to pay the surrogate mothers of these two small children. Of course a few months later when we had reconciliated the children never materialised and he as usual denied ever saying anything of the sort. Yes, he tried to be a complete dominator using manipulation tactics over me. However, I am not that easy to dominate or manipulate being that I was born believing to be an individual with independence although retaining the knowledge that we are all interdependent and I have been that way all of my life. I also had a good teacher. My mother was also a dominator who tired to use manipulative tactics from which I took very good observance of watching her tricks to try to dominate others. I personally ignored my mother when she tried to dominate me on the advice of my father which of course would annoy her but that was not my problem. My mother had the problem, as I believe it is truly wrong to try to have domination over another for any reason whatsoever. And to also use the force of manipulation for domination is nothing short of mental illness. After all, God gave everyone freedom of choice. I will say that I went through a heck of a lot of confusion with my ex-husband. Oh and let’s not forget the violent rape I endured as a 16 year old virgin along with being sacked from 5 different jobs in the business world over a period of years including one time when I was in hospital and during a hiatus between operations laying in my hospital bed when the news of that sacking took place. Must not forget the 11 operations I have had to endure mainly of ‘woman’s’ problems no doubt created by the rape from the age of 18 up and through the use of the Copper 7 IUD contraceptive device all of which rendered my memories in a haze for 11 years which is why I now prefer to stick to my own path in life without doctors and operations and continue with my art instead of working for a business corporation. And to top it of, the death of both my parents followed a brother who stated to me after our mother’s death that he never wanted a sister, never considered he had ever had one and did not want one now although I already knew that due to his treatment of me all throughout my young life as his sister but that’s his problem as I have never said I didn’t want a brother, so I still send him cards on special occasions. The above are some of the experiences I have had to endure in my life and through those experiences I have learnt a lot about the state of depression but through it all I have never allowed myself to fall into such weakness of character that I allowed myself to become a victim to anti-depressant drugs or any other substance that was not natural to the physical body and good mental health. I dealt with the pain of it all my own way and with the help of my strong faith and belief in God. And, from what I had gone through in many different ways I had every right to suffer the inflictions of both deep depression and confusion and I learnt a lot from those experiences. What I have learnt may help to turn a lot of people around in their view of life. I can only hope and pray for that to be as a helping hand to my fellow brothers and sisters in this world. God said to Lot’s wife “Do not look back or you shall surely turn to a pillar of salt and blow away”. There is a very good message in that statement for people to learn. The message pertains to depression. You see, when Lot’s wife looked back she cried at leaving her past behind and died from her heartbreak. The ‘pillar of salt’ means the tears we cry and to ‘blow away’ means to die as in we don’t stay in the present moment and even though it means that a ‘change’ of life is on the horizon that may create ‘fear’ in some people so they don’t want to change. The truth is if we don’t go with the ‘change’ we lose our way on the pathway of life and that helps to result in more depression. I have every reason for a deep great depression but I no longer allow myself the pity party. When we reflect back on the ‘bad things’ that have happened in our life along our pathway to the now, where we are in life at the present time, we can fall into a ‘depressive state’. Some people sit and stare into nowhere, some cry at lot. I was more of a crier until I realised all I was doing by crying was creating wrinkles and sometimes hyperventilating which was frightening in itself so I stopped crying and started learning from the experiences that I had gone through in my life. I started asking God why, what was I to learn from those experiences but I didn’t ask out loud while kneeling I quietly asked from within myself and connected to that higher energy force from my heart with great yearning to know why I had been subjected to such a mess of a life. What I learnt was that a lot of control dramas happen to people and that we are not always aware of them. For example: parents who have criticized, intimidated, interrogated or whatever and made their child feel ‘aloof’ and as a result the child has cut themselves off from other people due to feeling they may get criticized or interrogated for their actions or words by others, or when they look back at life at what so far has happened in their life the ‘poor me’ syndrome gets acted out. The ‘oh, why did it happen to me’ or ‘if only my mother/father had treated me better’ types. At the time of such things being said or done the child doesn’t necessarily think that but the memories of those actions, those words, get lodged into the child’s sub-conscious memory and comes to the surface later in life where the ego takes it on and starts to eat away at the now adult due to the child within that is still feeling hurt by those past actions of treatment. Oh I’ve been there and done that too but I didn’t get any answers from the ‘oh, why did it happen to me’ scenarios. It wasn’t until I stopped feeling sorry for myself that the answers started to come and by then I was strong enough without falling to pieces and wise enough to sit quietly and listen without judgement or trying to fight for my own opinion of the whys and wherefores. I learnt to listen silently and learnt in the interim of doing so the meaning of the saying: silence is golden, as it certainly is when the answers come with reasoning and understanding – enlightenment. Depression is a form of keeping oneself de-pressed. Keeping oneself ‘down’ as one may have a ‘fear’ about moving out of their comfort zone of which is all they have known in their life no matter how bad those past experiences may have been. Unfortunately by keeping themselves ‘down’ people don’t evolve as they get stuck in a rut of what becomes their nothingness. Their own living hell where it all just keeps going around and around until they learn they have to let it all go and forgive and forget and move on along their pathway of life as they don’t need to keep living the nightmare that they have set up for themselves through their own self-indulgent mourning for their past. Or, they can keep sitting in their memories of past wrongs and keep the depression festering away at themselves, which is what the ego loves to do as it then has control over the person instead of the person having control over it. Yes, that old devil within, the ego gets us into more trouble then we bother to even realise. Forgiving and forgetting is needed to get over blocks in life. We also have to learn to ask for guidance of what we were to learn from those experiences. It is a new step to getting to know one’s self and connecting to a greater force from within – the greater divine spirit of life. Meditation in a park like setting is a good place to start as nature exchanges energy with / humans. It is a source of a far stronger divine universal energy and helps to lift people’s spirit to where they should be in life. Meditation also teaches people to connect to their inner spirit for guidance as we all have the answers for ourself within ourself. Control dramas are something that was set up within people eons ago when societies started losing their connection to God’s nature and started thinking more from human’s ego instead. / Maybe it was a necessary function that enabled this world to progress to this point in time to become the technological age that it has but over use of such control dramas have now become forms of mental illness as one sets themselves against another and loses their own direction of self and their sense of being for it must never be forgotten that God gave everyone freedom of choice and without that freedom of choice the soul mourns and the spirit depletes. Depression is sparked from control dramas. Some parents use control dramas on their children as a form of energy exchange and children do the same back to their parents in other ways of control for their quota of energy. This system then sets up a depressed state in a child as they feel misunderstood or ‘out of tune’ with their parents or peers. They may also feel that they don’t belong not only with these parents but also in this world. And, the parents get annoyed then depressed for getting annoyed because the child won’t play the game of being controlled so patterns are then set up within the household that create animosities which over time everyone feels guilty for and hides their feelings from each other. All feelings of such should be discussed; aired out and forgiven otherwise no-one member can move on without feelings of guilt, sadness and eventually depression. Over time of course it will slowly be forgotten, particularly by children but the memory will still sit within the sub-conscious until the day the ego decides it needs to be paid attention and it will bring the memory back to the surface where once again depression will become the game of the day for the ego to get its desired attention. This tactic of the ego is what keeps people down and from reaching their potential goals with any great happiness or bliss. They are doing it to themselves for allowing themselves to continue harbouring the feelings of past hurts be that rejection, words said in anger or any other action that was taken against them for whatever reason. They are still the ones allowing themselves to dwell on those past actions. Children are a lot closer to the divine energy of God than their parents who through time have moved further away chasing their adult pursuits, and as such feel lost and get depressed too but adults really need to ask themselves: do they really need more in the way of material possessions. Do they really need more in the way of domination over another which is just keeping that form of mental illness occurring in society creating more animosity of one against the other. The spirit within each and everyone doesn’t need to be dominated. It knows more than the ego of each and everyone will ever know. It is the key to enlightenment and the teacher of knowledge that is not even in educational books and it is freely within each and everyone who is having a physical experience upon this earth – if they want to connect to it from within their own heart and through their desire to be free of self-inflictions. What I learnt more than anything from all the horrendous experiences I have gone through in / my life is that no one else lives my life. Only I do. No one else makes me do anything. Only I give myself permission to do whatever I choose to do and as such I have no right to blame anyone for what has happened to me in my life, I only have myself to blame for allowing myself to have those experiences in the first instance. I chose to be with my ex-husband. No one forced to be with him. I chose to go to the beach where I got raped instead of to work. No one made me go. I allowed myself to be convinced by the doctor that a Copper 7 IUD was the best contraceptive way for me to go. I could of said no. I chose to take up smoking. No one made me take it up. I chose all my experiences so therefore I cannot blame another but myself and once I realised that truth then I also chose to stop allowing myself to be depressed by forgiving myself and then allowing myself to stop looking back and just get on with life as it is now, not yesterday, the past which has been and gone, history that can never be changed but the present moment in which I breath and therefore live. And I thank God for allowing me to see that I chose to be a victim of my own making just like everybody else with depression chooses that for themselves too. It has always been your own choice just as it can be your own choice to let go of your depression, anxiety or any other self-induced infliction and start living the life you have been reaching for but are keeping from your own grip. And, as the old saying goes: God helps those that help themselves. And that I can testify is true. © C J Lewis, 2008 Here are some interesting, and enlightening, videos for those interested in watching the way psychiatrists have been pushing drugs upon people suffering from depression. I chose not to fall into the trap of such temptation, as I didn’t feel my depression was caused by chemical imbalances in the brain or whatever other excuse they throw at you. I believe if you are in tune with your body then you will know from within yourself if you have a chemical imbalance. I knew my depression was caused from my experiences. I had kept diaries for some years that allowed me to view back with truth those experiences as written down. Too many people grab the drugs and then wonder why they aren’t feeling any better but instead are feeling worse. These videos are quite an eye-opener. A BIG THANK YOU to my friend blamo for supplying the link to the videos…for what they expose is something I believe, everyone should know about. / /
They say that silence is golden, but I reckon it’s more like lead: hard, heavy and cold. / Occasionally I slip out of the mainstream and f…
They say that silence is golden, but I reckon it’s more like lead: hard, heavy and cold. / Occasionally I slip out of the mainstream and fall into myself for a while. It’ll pass. Take care everyone!!! :-) xox Jennifer B
This came to me via an Email – just too funny not to share. Hope you enjoy as much as I did. Men Are Just Happier People—What do …
This came to me via an Email – just too funny not to share. Hope you enjoy as much as I did. Men Are Just Happier People—What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100. People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them. New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. / / Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. / / Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. / / You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocketknife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. / You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes. / / No wonder men are happier. / / Send this to the women who can handle it and to the men who will enjoy reading it.
G’day folks. Years ago, I would never have envisaged writing about depression from first-hand experience. Well, I am and I hope by doi…
G’day folks. Years ago, I would never have envisaged writing about depression from first-hand experience. Well, I am and I hope by doing so it may prompt others to action. Last year it was suggested to me by a couple of family members that I see my General Practitioner. It’s good that those close to me could see a change in my health and make that suggestion. Being a bloke who thinks that everything will sort itself out, in this instance it hasn’t. Recently, I made a move and made an appointment with my GP. My situation is still being assessed, however I’m very much looking forward to a healthier me. I’ve had eight sessions with a psychologist to date and things are going okay. Thankfully, I still have enough marbles floating around inside my cranium to realise that there’s got to be some changes enacted by me to become healthier. Anyway, enough of me. I’m happy to talk about depression with anyone here, whether it be publicly on this journal or privately via bubblemail. My motivation is to raise awareness and provide information to those who feel they may need advice. A few things I’d like to mention which may assist: Australia’s national depression initiative, beyondblue, is an organisation which provides information about depression to consumers, carers and health professionals. A beaut port of call for those thinking of taking that first step for assistance. / www.beyondblue.org.au There’s an excellent book authored by Dr Sarah Edelman titled: Change your thinking which deals with positive and practical ways to overcome stress, negative emotions and self defeating behaviour. Available for purchase online at Borders. Highly recommended. / www.borders.com.au It’s Movember. This is where we can all raise awareness about men’s health issues, encourage one another, and help those organisations which can do with support. I’m taking part in the Movember initiative this year, and for the first time in my life I’ll be growing a moustache. As someone who knows first-hand what depression is like, I feel that using my clean shaven face and knowledge can help and inspire others. If you’d like to support me during Movember, click on my Movember link or graphic to donate or leave a comment. Thanks for reading folks. And fellas, go for it. Good luck. Darren Stones at Movember – http://au.movember.com/mospace/240833 Share this page with your social network:
Owwwww! I’ve got a toothache and have to phone the dentist, I HATE dentists! Sooo blah! Anyway, here’s another collection of my Art compi…
Owwwww! I’ve got a toothache and have to phone the dentist, I HATE dentists! Sooo blah! Anyway, here’s another collection of my Art compiled into a video. / / Ciao 4 now / Jennifer B / xox / / / / (Not sure if this embedding code will work, I’m trying out the redbubble version…)
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/ Thanks so much Sal for buying these tees today: / Butterfly Effect / Art Chick / Even Angels Get the Blues / Tattoo Elephant
I had such a lovely visit last night with ‘The Bubble’, I miss the hours I used to spend on line. And I do mean hours. So much has ha…
I had such a lovely visit last night with ‘The Bubble’, I miss the hours I used to spend on line. And I do mean hours. So much has happened because of those hours spent. Life and Art unfolding… becoming more. Recently I’ve met such wonderful people and am having fun. I am also working lots in my craft and workin me body too! / . / There is nothing more satisfying for me like giving thanks to those on this amazing site who have been instrumental in my creative JOY!!! / . / Fran Moore from the day I met her has been such a loving and creative inspiration for me. Her group Solo Exhibition has become a shining lighT for artists to experience a solo exhibition here on RB. And for some it is their first to be SEEN SOLO!!. Also the Ezine she created and is dedicated to BLOWS ME AWAY!!! INSIDE SOLO (THIS IS ISSUE #17 I’VE LINKED YOU TO CAUSE.. WELL I AM IN IT!!) gives us the scoop on fellow bubblers here inside the bubble as well as what is going on outside in the Art World.. Because of her dedication to her Ezine and the members of Solo she has put much of her creative talents on the back burner. She is an amazing artist and shares freely her knowledge on ‘how to’ tutorials that you can find in her ezine. A couple of my favs of hers: / Rain Dance / / And / / WOW FRAN.. HERE: / . / something just for you.. now take a break and have a sip and Have A Hug….. / / Whew YOU ROCK / ∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞∞ / SPEAKING OF HUGS… / / . / DEAR ROSA COBOS / My Goodness there is so much love emanating from her Soul. She said recently I am not into Souls.. well I don’t know about that cause her Soul really has an abundant healing and giving Source and I have felt this many times over. Rosa I am including you in my Joy of Appreciation because your work on Nirvana , a fine group started by lPrasad some time ago, is beyond measure. You take the time to read each and every persons works and you comment on many. I appreciate you Rosa. / Rosa is another fine artist and most know of her intense talent for verse as well as image. / Two of my faves… / O Tu…SuavissimaVirga / “ / Without eyes, you can contain the Light of Lights. / Without mouth, tender and flesh…kissing the air, / you can blow the ardent star of the Gods up. / Without sighings…. / you can defend the honesty of your heart.. / Without laughing…. / you can make the flowers dance… / and open their organs with impudence / .... / Sigh… / and / Canoe Traveling Dream / / ...Rosa.. have a HUG.. and please forgive me. xxx
After being with Niece and family on Christmas eve I was driving home. If I could have closed my eyes I would have. LIke the poem I wro…
After being with Niece and family on Christmas eve I was driving home. If I could have closed my eyes I would have. LIke the poem I wrote yesterday called How Is It I felt warm and I felt a presence of arms wrapped around me that made me smile and reminisce once again over my last 2 years since coming to RB and choosing to live again. / . / Right before I was to arrive home I came out from my attention to driving and my reverie and looked at the time, it was 11:11pm and then I looked at my miles in gas… 111.1… omg.. I thought.. it is the Universe supporting my thinking and letting me know how LOVED I am indeed. I was beaming and again I chose to think of people and situations that felt good to think about. My appreciation level was off the charts. I came inside and did my thing for bed, and snuggled up with RB.. (you) and saw that my choices for the front Home Page has been chosen for Christmas Day Morning 12:00am… it was just that time. The artists I have come to know since enjoying the amazing and loving group over at HOMEPAGE has been expanding my heART and I feel even a more ‘part of’ this bubble which frankly I feel was instrumental in showing me just what I needed to come out of a deep depression that was lasting way too long a short 2 years ago. / . / / The Artists who comprise this set of features are ones I have never met before but you can bet I have most of them in my watchlist now. / . / It pays to love what your life is giving you right NOW… your vibration rises to all your treasure trove of desires and you find out that the law of attraction is about the principle / ‘That which is Liken to Itself Is Drawn’... when I am feeling the appreciation for my NOW.. and choosing thoughts that feel good, my life just keeps getting better. / . / Merry Christmas Morning Friends.. / We Are Surely Blessed!! / . / Linaji
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