Chongsparks
1 member found
-
craig sparks
United Kingdom
145 creative works found
-
Eds
by craig sparks -
This wasn’t exactly what these guys had in mind when they left the fridge this morning. They thought they’d have a nice day out but bad reports from the rest of the fridge occupants meant that punishment was due. I will not abide badness, especially from chicken ovulations.
-
I swear I only put it down for 5 minutes! Looks like I’ll have to use Saturday until I can find Sunday again. But that’s no bad thing. In fact I think I’ll misplace Monday to Friday then every day can be Saturday.
-
I’ve seen what onions can do to people. Do you know they laugh at you behind your back while you’re crying? Pure evil. Nice in stir-frys though.
-
12.99 a roll from the local insane asylum.
-
Eggsecution gave you gore…now witness terror in the prequel. From the same chicken’s bottom they came, brothers thrown together in a world of omlettes, scrambling and cakes. Their fortunes would be forged in a low quality carboard box, their struggles played out in the saucepan. Eggsecution…the beginning. Certificate 18
-
Just as the day will come when we’ll wear our computers so will the day when we become known only through our barcodes. Machines stripping away our identity to just some random numbers and a few thick-thin lines.
-
What with the price of gas going up every other second I can no longer afford to fill a bath with hot water.
-
How far we have come from eating raw mammoth to this. Mammoth – spear – knife – stomach. Now it’s… Mine tin – refine ore – maufacture tin – grow beans – cook – package – distribute – grow wheat – harvest – make bread – distribute – manufacture toaster – manufacture gas hob – manufacture pan – cook beans (again) – toast bread – stomach.
-
It’s a sad state of affairs when your clothes lead you to the laundry monster. It’s not that I’m lazy, it’s just that I don’t have time to lavish on the mundane things. But it calls me to it. It makes me put little soluble packets of detergent in it and makes me fill up it’s little tray with pink fabric softener. I don’t have time for this crap. Too many ideas to partially fulfill in so little time.
-
Cheating is no way to win but if you can get away with it do it. Especially if there’s money on the table. Beware though because you never know what somebody will have under the table. Besides their legs.
-
Isn’t it always the case when you desperately need the lavatory? There’s always a huge queue. The worst thing is when you finally get there and there’s no paper left and the only paper you have is what’s in your wallet.
-
The Egg Wars were brutal. They fought to free their kind from mealtime servitude. Sickened at the fate of their brothers and sisters, butchered daily in the POW kitchen. They risked all and paid the highest price. Sacrificing themselves so the Revolution would live on. Vive la Oeuf !
-
Led by Hans, the big cheese, the Grocery Gang were out for adventure. Stuck too long on shelves they escaped the supermarket. Upon finding an old abandoned kitchen they entered…and never left.
-
With the revolution quashed it only remained to interrogate the captives. Away from the eyes of the United Nations the Geneva Convention was forgotten and the torture began. “We will have our revenge!” they shouted, as each entered the pan of pain. The resilience of the captured revolutionaries was admirable but they would all crack in the end.
-
Once again, something you don’t get with concrete. Once these old sea defences have been replaced we’ll never see things like this again in our own lifetimes. Although I suppose protecting the coast is a more pressing issue than preserving aesthetically pleasing things.
-
After much persuading she finally agreed to pose for me topless.
-
The insanity of the nuts had begun to taint the fruitbowl. The bowl used to be a place of harmony until the bananas moved in and started to turn everything funny. Only the grapfruit retained some vestige of sanity but that was bound to disappear soon.
-
Even though the Corks were defeated the equilibrium of the Kitchen was far from back to normal. The work surfaces were rife with lawlessness and the big, bad Bramleys took full advantage.
-
Everyone knows what Pandora’s Box was but there was also Pandora’s little known pickle jar. Upon opening the jar little slices of pickled cucumber were cast upon the world, along with all the crap she’d already let out of her Box.
RedBubble is a great place to find art, design, photos and writing from over 80,000 talented people.
You can buy their stuff
On stunning greeting cards, awesome t-shirts or beautiful prints to hang on your walls.
Risk Free Returns
It’s really simple. If you’re not happy with your purchase for any reason, we’ll fix it.
About RedBubble
Since February 2007 we’ve shipped over 327,100 items to more than 70 countries around the world.
Join In
Sign up for your free account, upload your work, join some groups and share your creative genius with the world.