Boobies are so wonderful
Boobies are so nice
Boobies go so great with scotch
Or bourbon over ice.
Some guys live for love that’s true
Some guys live for cooters
I prefer to write dumb poems
About bodacious hooters
Boobies ain’t just singular
They’re always set up double
I love to plant my face in them
And go…"BLUBBLE UBBLE UBBLE!
Boobies are so versatile
And have so many names
Knockers, ta-tas, hooters, knobs…
I call mine Ralph and James.
Boobies come in such a wide
Variety of sizes
Some are just so awesome
That they merit awesome prizes.
Of course there are some not so nice
That look like bowling pins
With stretch-marks flopping down somewhere
Around your granny’s shins.
I love to watch the gals go by
And watch their buttocks wiggle
But really I’d much rather watch
Their boobies bounce and jiggle
Some of you might laugh at me
To write this silly rhyme
But boobies are my special love
To me they are sublime.
If I were Emperor of the world
And master of all cities
I’d pass a law to keep the girls
From covering their titties
Let them puppies loose I say
Let ‘em sway and flop
Riverdance be damned I say
Let’s do the Boobie Hop
I really respect womanhood
And all their wondrous feats
Especially wet t-shirts
That show off their wondrous teats.
I see boobs were e’er I look
In mountains, lakes and rivers
I sculpt them from all kinds of things
Like marble and chopped liver.
So if you think that I’m uncouth
For where my head is at
That’s O.K, I’ll give you that…
Then swap you TIT for tat.
So in the end if you’ll forgive
My weird preoccupation
I’ll seek the help I truly need
And keep you aBREAST of the situation.
Thank you and good evening.
A dumb poem about bodacious hooters