Cool Customer
Claustrophobia: Twisted Tales theme #48.
Cool Customer belongs to the following groups:
Twisted TalesHis elderly father had insisted on going to the store. It started as he answered, a minor discomfort in the middle of his back.
He didn’t want to go out. His younger sister said she would take him.
He stood and smiled and waved good-bye.
As the car backed down the drive, the pain spread. First there was a burning sensation, then tightness across his chest.
He placed both hands on the counter and drew a deep breath. He picked up his cigarettes. He decided he needed to sit down.
His face was hot. Then came a dull stabbing ache. The walls seemed to close in. This was going to be a bad one.
He winced. He rubbed his chest and tried stretching. He loosened his collar.
It had happened before. The room would suddenly feel as though the air was gone. The last time he was under stress at the office. Usually it wasn’t this bad, but there had also been times when it was worse.
He leaned back in the recliner. He looked at the phone. He figured there was no need for panic. Getting excited won’t make it go away. Just relax he told himself.
Silence was suddenly deafening. He could hear time ticking like a shout.
He clicked the remote. He tapped the pack of cigarettes and calmly slid one out and laid it on the coffee stand. He searched through his pockets for a lighter. Nothing to fear he told himself. It will pass. Just like before, it will pass.
“Who called it in?”
“The family. Said they came back from shopping and he was just sitting there.”
“Look at him— cool as a cucumber— like he didn’t have a care in the world!”
“Happens all the time, dude. Man, mid fifties, never had a symptom of heart trouble in his life, then bam! Out goes the light!”
“Poor slob. Sat down to suck a choke and watch the game. Never knew what hit him.”
ArcadiaTempest
ahhhh poor bugger! And that they way it sometimes happens…. Your descriptive writing of his panic was wonderful. Really enjoyable reading Bob….great story. :)
Bob Fox replied
Thank you KarenSue! I appreciate the comment!
ArcadiaTempest
Oh….excuse my poor sentence construction…..typing too fast for my brain to catch up!
Solar Zorra
Well that was a might scary! Probably happens that way more often than not actually. Good story Bob!! :) SZ
Bob Fox replied
Something similar happened to a friend. For several years I wondered why he was just sitting there. I started thinking about others that I heard of that had just seemed to tip over dead— then I remembered the denial thing. That became the story. Thanx for looking, Janine!
George Yesthal
Had a brush with panick attacks myself for a spell. I finally got it under control by sheer force of will but not before several trips to the ER just to find out it was panick each time. They sent me off with a scrip for Xanax which I took for a while. Didn’t much care for idea of depending on dope to handle it so I just gave that up. Jack Daniel’s work great but exacts a steep price for his ministrations and counseling. I see him on a social level only now. I agree that those who get this under control by “just handling it” are probably damning themselves to curse of not seeking help when the BIG ONE comes. Alas, we are all in the throes of the human condition.
Great piece,Bob.
Bob Fox replied
I’m happy to report that I never had a panic attack (except when in real danger— and then I kicked some butt), however folks I’ve known that suffered them say it’s no fun!
Jim Hall
Story sounds true. I better be careful. I’m in that category. Pretty good, Bob! JH
Bob Fox replied
Thanx Jim, I appreciate you giving me a read!
Micky McGuinness
I found myself reaching out for an imaginary brown paper bag to breathe into… you it really made me feel like it was happening to me. A great well written short. I do wish you’d have a stab at one of the the Twisted Tournoi
Bob Fox replied
Thanx for the comment and the encouragement! I like the idea of your Twisted Tournoi— life just seems to get in the way and I didn’t leave enough time to offer anything this time. I wouldn’t have made the Twisted Tale had it not been for a little peer pressure from Sol Zorra and staying up late. I’ll give it some thought…
Zolton
Well written. Well worded. Not what I was expecting at the end. Although it seems obvious now! Scariest story I’ve read in a while.
Bob Fox replied
Thanx Zolton! As usual, it was an experiment— this time 5 characters, but none by name, the last two without attributions. I also changed POV, which is normally a no-no, but it seemed the only natural way to bridge from the dilemma to the decision. Then again, maybe that was confusing…
Alison Pearce
Excellently written Bob!
Bob Fox replied
Thanx Allison! Nice to have reader to write for!
Micky McGuinness
Well Bob the new Twisted Tournoi is underway so you have a month to get your thing cap on!
Twisted Tournoi 03
Bob Fox replied
It’s good that I re read the guidelines for Twisted Tournoi. Must have skimmed it before, because I had the notion in mind that the submissions were 3500 words min. Oops. Thanx for encouraging me to take another look!
Micky McGuinness
No probs Bob… by the way I was ecouraging you to get your thinking cap on not thing cap… whatever that is!
Typo hell ; )
Jen Wahl
really good… I had no idea where this was going!
Bob Fox replied
Thank you Jen. I appreciate you giving it a read!