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Eloise Le Blue and the hairy nosed wombat (part 8)

It was early Sunday morning, around elevenses and Eloise was taking care of business, paying homage to the international airstrip conventions, when Elvis walked in on her machinations…

Oh no, why did you just do that?

Do what? Use my beard trimmer to build your runway…? Well it’s a beard of sorts isn’t it? And it’s looking kinda cute if you ask me… Who’s asking you anyway? Well you are, in a weird kinda way…What’s your problem long streak? No problem… Well you could have fooled me. That wouldn’t be hard would it? Guess who’s a little titchy this morning…? What do you mean by titchy? _How bout a down right nasty boy?_ I don’t know what you mean? That’s cos you’re thick!!! Thick!!! Yeah thick with a double TTT! That’s a triple TTT!!! Yeah, thick as…! Nice…! Go nice yourself…!!!

Ooh look out girl wonder…! Wonder what! Wonder what you’ll look like with your head shaved…? You wouldn’t dare…! Oh wouldn’t I now…? No way jose’…! No sweat hose B…! There’s no time like the present…! You and whose army…? Don’t need no army girlfriend…there’s just me and the heavy artillery…! You mean Mr Peabody…? hahahahahahahaha Yeah bringing on the heavy artillery….. You wish sunshine! Nah you wish, you know you want it big time… No dice big boy, you’re on your own with that there problem… There’s no problem sweetheart, it’s all there for business…

How bout a little trim between friends…? What do you mean a little trim between friends? You know exactly what I mean, you hairy nosed wombat…! You’re not touching my enchilada with that there weapon! Thought you had the weapon big guy??? Smart arse… Smart arse yourself! Come to mama baby… Not in this lifetime… Come to mama big guy… I love the smell of napalm in the mornings… This aint no apocalypse honey, it’s a barbers quartet… What’s the quartet? One, two, three, four…munchkin aint got fur no more…kinda quartet… Verry funny… A total hoot…ooh looks like the battery is going flat… Yeah…? Yeah… Oh that’s sad, that’s really sad… It just died… Oh that’s too bad… You recon? I recon… No trim for you today big boy… Oh that’s too bad… Yeah bet you’re cut up… Totally cut up… No Mohican today… No Mohawk today then… No change for the better… No chance to get better… No good news at all… No news is good news baby girl…and from what I hear, air traffic control has a plane circling to land…

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Eloise Le Blue and the hairy nosed wombat (part 8) by 


Eloise Le Blue is my blue haired girl, who sashays her way through life and it’s many foibles…and you gotta love that…

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wildwomenlove short stories

Hi there
I write poetry and stories, paint, take photos and make films…I’m learning singing, electric guitar and am at art school…
art is my heart song…wanna sing it with me ?

big love
Sharon
x

© wildwomenlove all works

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Comments

  • hollypaino
    hollypainoover 4 years ago

    Eloise….Eloise….Eloise….! (my chant for your writing here!) I love all the euphemisms you’ve placed in this. If they keep getting better, I’m going to have to keep choosing a new favorite part every time…!

  • woohoo audience chanting is goood…thanks Holly…you’re a wonderful fan…I love you…mwa mwa mwa…

    – wildwomenlove

  • Soaps
    Soapsover 4 years ago

    Holy Cow Eloise, this is your best yet? I am right with Hollypaino. I can’t get over just how brlliant this is………….. I can’t even begin to comment!! Me Sudsy Malone, speechless!! God Almighty woman, how the hell did you just do that? I am under your pedestal!!!

  • so cool, I’ve gobsmacked Sudsy Malone…yeehaa I am soo glad you like honey bun…and you look soo gorgeous in your suds…Suds…xxx

    – wildwomenlove

  • Trenchtownrock
    Trenchtownrockover 4 years ago

    LOL..you have me totally locked into this one my friend..I do think this is one of the best so far..you have really brought this out of the darkness and into the light with your writing..nicely done.

  • yay Sugar Trench, so glad to see you chained to the wheel…thank you my friend for your wonderful support and encouragement…its very bootilicious to receive…xxx

    – wildwomenlove

  • Soaps
    Soapsover 4 years ago

    Hey there, Sugar Trench is my bitch, but I will let you share him as I love you both so xx

  • yo yo yo yo yo…guess that says it all…xxx

    – wildwomenlove

  • Cathal .
    Cathal .over 4 years ago

    you nailed this one ! so much chemistry and it’s bang bang bang all the way, very well done and the reader immediately imagines the scene and the tension/spark because of the style you write it in, brilliant ! :)

  • Hey Cathal, so nice to see you…hope all is getting better in your world…thanks for the read and the brilliant, that’s bloody nice to see I must say…hope your week is boring as batshit…hee hee hee x

    – wildwomenlove

  • timbuckley
    timbuckleyover 3 years ago

    Full of your wonderful humor and wit razor sharp

  • ta muchly Timothy…razor sharp! verry funny…x

    – wildwomenlove

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