This was a magical place. A place he’d cherished as a child. He’d stumbled across it, trying to hide from his drunken father. Now, many years later, he’d returned.
Lying here on his back, hands behind his head, Malcolm savoured the cool, earthy smells around him. He closed his eyes and filled his lungs slowly, emptied them, and sighed. He stayed still for a long while, willing this ancient land to infuse its life back into him. He wanted once again to feel its rhythms, to hear its heart beating, soothingly, strongly. Speak to me! Please speak to me, he cried silently. Deep down, in that black pit of agony, he felt guilty and no longer worthy of its succour. He’d abandoned it. Not deliberately. Things just happened, and he’d found himself in other places, distracted. After he’d moved to the city and met Sarina he’d been blissfully happy, completely forgetting about Here. This realisation alarmed him. It was like forgetting he’d ever existed before her. Now he’d come back, because of her, Sarina, seeking out the whispers again. But did he have a right to do so? Also, all those years ago, perhaps it had just been his imaginings, born from a child’s need to escape from reality? How could he know? Children often confuse fantasy with truth.
A light breeze started up, gently kissing his face and hands as it passed over him, and rustling the surrounding shrubbery. Malcolm opened his eyes and watched the movement of the tree fern fronds above him. Through them, and beyond, the sky was beautiful; blue with small, fat puffs of white clouds. He frowned. He was sure there’d been no sign of clouds earlier. He’d checked on his way up here. Suddenly the breeze stopped. All was quiet. It seemed that even the birds stopped singing. But Malcolm’s chest was so filled with despair it took several moments before he became aware of the hush. Had they heard him after all? Could they feel this pain that begged for him to be dragged into the earth and become part of it? He waited, hoping. Nothing happened. He decided to stay longer, unable to face the trip back to the house.
The moss beneath him was soft and comforting. Strange…….he hadn’t noticed its dampness before. He relished the feeling. An ant crawling up the tree fern caught his attention so he let his eyes follow the tiny creature until it disappeared. The sky peeked at him, disappeared, and peeked again repeatedly through the fronds. Ah, the breeze has picked up again. Birds resumed chattering and singing. Malcolm strained his ears for more, to hear past these sounds. It had always been like this – a sudden stillness before they appeared. Only it used to happen more quickly.
While he listened, he could feel his body becoming detached, as in deep meditation, or deep relaxation, floating and weightless. If he moved even one digit he knew he’d lose that sensation so he remained motionless. A snowy-white butterfly flitted past his head, and perched on the toe of his black shoe. It compelled him to look at it. At first Malcolm wasn’t sure, but then the whisperings grew. His heart sang. They are still here! They are real and I still belong!
Slowly the butterfly changed. It metamorphosed into the misty shape of the Old One, all veils and flowing, smoky robes, deep blue eyes, and a few wispy grey strands of hair. She was exactly as he’d remembered. Ancient, but ageless. Everything she knew and said was in her eyes. She exchanged no words with him. The others materialized too, surrounding him, soothing him, whispering incomprehensibly amongst themselves. All the grief he had been holding onto for so long since Sarina had died, taking their baby with her, was drawn from him. He believed Sarina was there with him, part of him now. Gazing into the Old One’s eyes he found his answer. He was safe and at peace.
Something different happened this day though, something that had never happened before. Malcolm felt himself soaring up into the sky and through the clouds. He could see the house below him and the people in it, and he could see where he had been lying on the moss under the tree fern. As suddenly and effortlessly as he had ascended, he descended, making a turn towards the sea, diving down deep, flying through the oceans. He felt connected to everything, understood everything, and was totally part of this universal mass. Am I dead? Malcolm wondered, but he was not afraid. All he felt was supreme joy.
No, you are not dead, her eyes told him. But understand that Sarina and your child are not lost to you. It is simply that you cannot see them.
The Old One set him down gently, exactly as she had found him. When you are ready, we will return to reclaim you. But you still have much to live for. With that she disappeared. As the whispers subsided Malcolm heard the vibrations of a strong heartbeat. Was that his heart, or was it coming from elsewhere? He couldn’t tell. So he just relaxed and enjoyed the rhythm.
As the sun rose higher, it shone brightly down through the fronds, onto Malcolm’s face. He opened his eyes with a start, shielding them from the stark light. He felt weird, unusually calm. Had he fallen asleep? He hadn’t meant to. But then again, he wasn’t sure that he had actually been asleep, so he couldn’t know whether that had been a dream, or not.
He looked around for something that might give him a clue. A little flutter, and a white butterfly landed on his wrist. He studied it closely. It was simply a butterfly, nothing more. But his chest no longer ached so badly with the heavy burden of grief. He accepted that he would never again hear Sarina when he talked to her, and he would never hear their baby’s happy gurgles, but could they hear him……………………..?
kseriphyn
Beautiful. I want to favourite it, but don’t know how.
Elaine van Dyk
Thanks Khylan, I’m really flattered. I’ve been told the “Favourites” thing will be possible around 13 April for Journal entries/Short stories, so you’ll just need to jot down all your favourite stories in a diary or something until then. I’ve got the same problem – so many I’d like to add to my fav’s.
Michael Douglass
I read this at lunch, its now 10pm and I’m still trying to verbalize why it appeals to me so much. Suffice to say I like it.
Alice
Hello!
Alice
Sorry, I meant to be more articulate than that but my phone rang. Just wanted to say was an interesting story and interesting (difficult, I think) subject matter. I enjoyed it very much.
Ghost Writer
Nice writing! Glad to hear that your dormant period is now over. Your prose is certainly is strong evidence of that. ‘Ancient, but ageless’ – wonderful!
Jienn Heibloem
Hi, Thankyou for your comments on my work. Its very encouraging to get feedback.
jennihei
jennihei@yahoo.comSunshine Coast Queensland -Australiarock
Thanks for the reminder, image now removed.
Regards,
Ronald
Jienn Heibloem
You are fast becoming my biggest fan- thankyou i am humbled by your watching- and i have fast become your biggest fan- hey that makes us fannies together (heeheel hope this doesnt offend-) i love your writing and your imagery- :)
Elaine van Dyk
Very funny! Not at all offended Jienn – gave me a big belly laugh….....I like your sense of humour.
kseriphyn
I can finally add this as a favourite. Good luck Whirligig.
Jackiet
Beautiful imagery, Whirligig – I’m glad you’ve rediscovered your creative muse
dopey
it’s a lovely, peaceful story.
Helene Kippert
I’m only just starting to look at journal entries – up to now I’ve been browsing the images. But I see that I’ve another whole new world to explore. I found this deeply moving.
RoseRed
Your story really moved me Whirligig. I felt I could see through Malcolm’s eyes, your writing really connected with me. I look forward to reading more.
RoseRed
Re my late posting: I had the 16th stuck in my head for some reason and it wasn’t till after I’d posted and started looking at other entries that I discovered my mistake. Soon after I picked myself up off the floor and realised that the world would still keep revolving! This is my first venture into the realm of posting on the net and getting feedback is very cool. Thank you for listing my work as one of your favourites…..I shall read on.
Ghost Writer
I reall y enjoyed this mystical piece of prose.
georgiegirl
It was a lovely story and it had a happy ending! Yay! Good luck with the comp… you have heaps of comments so you never know!!! I’ve crossed my mouse cord for you (instead of fingers, I need them to chit chat here)!
kookylane
beautiful and touching experience, a delightful read!
Michelle Rogers
Beautiful, sad, otherworldly. Impressed with your range of talents in not only writing, but also photography and art.
Craig Shillington
WOW!!! The hairs on the back of my neck are erect!!! Whirli … that was captivating, especially more so because … .well …. have you ever had an OBE? Ever been astral? You describe it well if you have!!!!
AmandaWitt
Your story led me to a peaceful, tranquil place where everything does seem to stop, even the bird calls.
Craig Shillington
And this one short listed too!! Wooohoooo :) Well done Whirli :D:D:D THIS is the Winner!! FER SURE!!!
AnnieC
Hooray! Can’t decide which one of your two stories I like best Whirli – lucky I voted for both! Also happy that you’re a Melbournite – that means you’ll make a definite appearance at the launch and I can meet you! Overall I’m so pleased you’ve found this site – you’re a great contributor, and really committed to keep things bubbling…Hope it’s giving you the blast of creativity and support that you said has been missing in the past. Luv Annie
kseriphyn
Congrats Whirli. Good luck.
Elaine van Dyk
Thanks everyone for your comments. Very much appreciated.
Craig, you’re very kind…. I doubt that I’ll be in the winning 15, but that doesn’t stop me hoping. However, I’ve had a ball along the way, and will continue to do so!
Annie, I will definitely be at the launch, and I look forward to meeting you (although I may be hiding in a little corner somewhere – a difficult task as I am quite tall. I’m really not very good with crowds).
RoseRed
Congrats whirligig, this is my favourite of your unleashed entries, I’m so glad it was shortlisted.
Ghost Writer
Good luck in the Final, whirligig! I knew this was a short lister all along!
craig scutt
Congrats ‘gig. Stand tall and proud! :)
mister khan
the pace of the piece is wonderfully meditative- your connection with nature is very strong and you draw on this. the feeling is earthy, and it suits the ‘story’. you have a super ability to draw on your emotional experience- something which until very recently i couldn’t even go near- and that gives the piece the depth which the spiritual nature of the subject needs to come off- that is often the strength of women’s writing, as opposed to the clinical or cynical observational or analytical nature of men’s
the other side of the coin is that it feels very personal- maybe a little too personal. that’s just my intuition, (don’t take it personally (sic)) and maybe it stems from my own emotional complexes (mentioned above)- i felt a little claustrophobic when i read it- like when you go to someone’s house and accidently walk into their bedroom when all you’re looking for the toilet. do you know what i mean?
Elaine van Dyk
I really appreciate your comments mister khan. I always welcome criticism that can help me along my creative writing journey, so thank you for your opinion. The only “real” thing in this story is the actual experience of a dream of seeing myself die (which I describe here as it happened to me). Perhaps that is what you are referring to? But you are correct in that I do write from deep within – I guess this is part of my art training. Perhaps for the time being the pendulum has swung too far, but hopefully may eventually rest somewhere in the middle. Only time will tell.
mister khan
if i’m looking inside your dream then i guess that explains alot. i reckon that’s a brave thing to share.
Damian
Hi Whirligig, I’m still moving through the stories LOL! Well done with this one making the short list too. I like that you write from deep within, and I enjoyed the positive journey with this story.
Elaine van Dyk
Thanks for the lovely comment Damian….sorry I haven’t been checking and commenting on people’s work the last few days, but I’ve had an op on my right eye which has sort of put me out of action. I’ll be back to normal in a couple of days.
kseriphyn
HI Whirli. Has it really been 5 mths since I read this? Wow, time flies.
Elaine van Dyk
Hi kseriphyn! Yes, so much has happened in that short time here on the Bubble! But it’s so good to see that we are still all going strong, along with the progress and the worldwide increase in members.