The Outside Stairs

Jill stood at the bottom of The Outside Stairs..her heart was beating so fast
she felt as if she couldn’t swallow. It would be her first meeting with her
father. Her father abandoned her and her mother when Jill was only a year old.
She didn’t really remember him.

She searched for months before she found his address..One Liberty Avenue,
Philadelphia, Pa. Jill didn’t call him for fear he would not want to see her.
It was an enormous staircase. As she climbed, she thought of her mother
telling her how her father beat her and Jill would cry because of her mother’s
screams. She remembered that her mother feared when someone knocked
at the door worrying he was returning and would harm Jill or kidnap her.
Her mother, Fran, moved several times in an attempt to hide.

She continued to climb and thought of Fran telling her, don’t ever go near
him, don’t contact him, forget that he is your father. He is mean, cruel and
satan-like. Jill wondered exactly what her mother meant. Continuing to
climb she started to picture what this man would be like..but now he was
old..how bad could he be. She stopped and started to picture this monster
like creature who would grab her and beat her as she walked in.

She continued up the stairs and remembered what a wonderful mother she
had. Fran always took care of her, worked long exhausting hours in order to
put food on the table and to keep up with the bills and buy Jill everything she
wanted. Jill continued to walk up the stairs and remembered Fran being
so ill with cancer and the chemotherapy …. how much she suffered. Jill
continued up the stairs. She remembered her mother’s funeral.

As she got to her father’s door and was about to knock, she thought of what
an injustice this would be to her mother’s memory. She thought you bastard
after what you did to my mother, I wouldn’t spit on you and she turned around
and descended The Outside Stairs knowing that her mother would be proud.

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