Tony Xanadu

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Official Tony Xanadu Facebook Profile

WELCOME MY FRIENDS TO THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF TONY XANADU

What can I say, I am the buffest man in the Universe.
I’m also a crime fighting vigilante who thwarts evil villains plans with one swift flying elbow to the throat. I then proceed to laugh at the girly villain men, hahaha!
No mere mortal is a worthy match for Tony’s mega buffness.
-Tony Xanadu.

TONY XANADU FACTS
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If you look in the mirror and say “TONY XANADU” 3 times TONY XANADU will appear and bench press your face into the ceiling.

TONY XANADU can have his cake and eat it too.

TONY XANADU is the definition of Buff.

TONY XANADU does not sleep. He waits.

Its not over until TONY XANADU says its over.

TONY XANADU can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.

TONY XANADU is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

Time waits for no man. Unless that man is TONY XANADU.

Contrary to popular belief, Australia is not a democracy, it is a Xanaduship.

Faster than a speeding bullet … more powerful than a locomotive … able to leap tall buildings in a single bound… yes, these are some of TONY XANADU’S warm-up exercises.

Guns don’t kill people. TONY XANADU kills People.

In an average living room there are 3,242 objects TONY XANADU could use to kill you, including the room itself.

When TONY XANADU goes in water, TONY XANADU doesn’t get wet. Water gets TONY XANADU.

TONY XANADU can divide by zero.

On his birthday, TONY XANADU randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.

TONY XANADU once ate 187 entire bottles of sleeping pills. They made him blink.

Many children wear Superman pyjamas to bed. Superman wears TONY XANADU pyjamas to bed.

TONY XANADU catches Armor Piercing Tank Shells every morning with his teeth for no particular reason at all.

Contrary to popular belief, the Titanic didn’t hit an iceberg. The ship was off course and accidentally ran into TONY XANADU while he was doing the backstroke across the Atlantic.

TONY XANADU got his drivers license at the age of 16. Seconds.

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