out looking for a little liquid work

i was sitting
at the bar

when mort walked in
carrying a sign
that read
IF IT WAS
UP TO ME
THE WORLD WOULD
BE A BEER.

it was
raining outside
and as he
walked across the
barroom floor
water squished out
the holes in his shoes.

he took a barstool

sat the sign down

and ordered
a double bourbon.

he swallowed
half of it
and told the barkeep
“look bub
if you gimme
free drinks
i’ll stand outside
yer bar all day
wit’ my sign here.
it’ll be like
gettin’ advertisin’
fer almost nuthin’!”

the barkeep
pulled a beer
out of the ice bin

had a hit off it
and replied
“the only free thing
yer gonna
git from me
izzat sign
up yer goddamn ass.”

mort finished off
his drink
and ordered another.

he drank
half of that one
and said
“okay then
i’ll go
half price
on the drinks.”

i took
a swallow of vodka
while wondering
if ol’ mort’s bunghole
was big enough
to accommodate
such a large sign.

- terry everton

out looking for a little liquid work

Terry Everton

Pasadena, United States

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