My Child

Wendy  Slee
Author: Wendy Slee
Word Count: 547
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My Child

Sharon Hammond inspired me to rethink this piece of writing created years ago for my daughter…....where I pondered on what was “mine” and what still is…....(and what never was….)
Thank you Sharon…hope you and your daughter share an amazing time together on the occasion of her wedding…...
and beyond.

My Child belongs to the following groups:

All Things Poetic, Artistic, Philosophical

For nine months only, you were my child.
You slept and woke within me as I slept and woke
Within the womb of the world that enfolded me.
A part of me in every sense –
You were me and I was you.
But in one raw and bloody moment,
In agony, our oneness was torn open,
As the light received you once more,
You broke through
And were born.
My earthly senses beheld you as my spirit welcomed you back,
And the physical cord that joined us was severed forever.
You ceased to be mine
If you ever were…

Now I look for my child
And she is here
In these garments;
So tiny, yet they clothed you once…
And if I hold them to my face I can smell you,
The warm, sweet scent of your being,
So evocative, haunting me,
Like the feel of the soft rugs that once wrapped you
Now enclosing my empty fingers.

And my child is here…
In the waxy masterpieces that colour my walls,
The fingerprints and crayon fantasies that choreographed your childhood,
The scribbled books and colouring ins,
The remnants of your classroom and your budding,
Blossoming quest, for meaning;
I can still see, the busy importance of small hands and intent lips.

And my child is here…
In the scatter of well-loved friends,
The broken, the wounded, the one-eyed,
The unconditional, unjudged friends,
Gazing up from the bed and the toybox,
So powerful in the love they shared;
Memories, like toys abandoned,
Found later to be loved again,
So real, yet so elusive.

And my child is here…
In these photographs,
These curling, colour paper memories…
Smiling at birthday candles,
Laughing at your own first steps.
The bubble-blowing, sticky-faced images
Of baby turned to child,
And the tentative reaching into womanhood,
The creative explorations into my clothing and lipstick,
Little feet in big girl shoes…
That walk!
All these glorious, expanding moments captured
Forever on the film of my mind…
Stored in the photo album of the soul.

And now you stand before me,
You, who I call daughter…
A product of so many lifetimes,
Yet with eternity as your future.
You who are so dear and so familiar
Yet a stranger still.

You are not my child.
You are the child of your own destiny…
And my role, so small in your grand scheme
Is an honour observed only by my proud eyes.
My child is here in this paper, this cloth, this memory.
My child is just a creation of my consciousness,
My desire personified…
And you are your own.
Just as I nurtured my child for nine months
With all of the love and hope I hold,
May you nurture your child with all that the universe holds.
I no longer hold you in my womb or my arms
But I hold you in my heart
Where love is the only cord that joins.
For the short time I carried you, we walked the same path
Now I go on, and you make your own footprints.
On the day of your birth, I stepped back from your path
As your soul broke free and your walk began.
You alone are your child,
Just as I am mine.
I love you.

  • Sharon Hammond

    Sharon Hammond

    OK – now I’m crying. Just beautiful Wendy.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Well, had to dust this one off thats for sure, but thank you for reminding me! I hope you have the best time ever with your daughter on her special day…..hugs!

  • Julie Langford

    Julie Langfordcommunity host

    Sensational writing Wendy – heart wrenching, yet filled with happiness and love – perfect!

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you Julie…... something about you and your kittens brought out the same emotion for me!! (smiles)

  • Chris Clark

    Chris Clark

    absolutely beautiful Wendy …... a grown man almost brought to the brink of weeping.

    Thank you for that

  • Wendy Slee replied

    thank me for almost making you weep? ;) lol Hope it was all good Chris…..
    and thank YOU for reading and commenting…... :
    ))

  • Helene Kippert

    Helene Kippert

    Moving and lovely wendy

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you Helene….. :-)

  • Crowmanic

    Crowmanic

    Ok, I’ve read it, I ‘heard’ it, you’ve said it. Now, how do you refer to her? and what does actually it ‘mean’ in living your life? (PS you’re not required to answer, I’m just thinking out aloud, kinda) [smile-wink]

  • Wendy Slee replied

    You are such a stirrer Djubba! I have no idea how to answer your question…..those were thoughts that just came out while pondering her leaving home…... many years ago….
    suffice to say, we often refer to each other as “best friends” which is indeed an honour…..(for me) (and makes me think at least I did something “right”....for what its worth…..and in the world of parenting, you have to hold onto all those little “somethings”.)

  • Phil Threlfall

    Phil Threlfall

    beautifully written

  • Wendy Slee replied

    one of my old “expressions” from several years ago…..but guess it is still the truth for me…....... thanks Phil xx

  • liesbeth

    liesbeth

    Oh my god… this brings tears to my eyes… words of wisdom..true words.. our children are not ours,they do need to walk their own path..not allways easy to let them be free, but they are here to experience for themselves..
    loves this line; “My earthly senses beheld you as my spirit welcomed you back” it is exactly how i felt with my firstborne..beautifull writing Wendy.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you so much for sharing your heartfelt reaction Liesbeth…I really loved hearing from you….this was my firstborn, who is now almost 24….but easily could apply to any of my four children…..
    thank you :-)

  • Robert Elliott

    Robert Elliott

    beautiful, moving brilliant writing Wendy

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Hi Robert…thank you for those beautiful words…... sometimes I forget just what inspiration our children and our relationships with them can give….. so glad you enjoyed this…. (smiles)

  • NinaMosi Art

    NinaMosi Art

    Ahhh Wendy…this is so beautiful. I am trying to swallow the lump in my throat. This is love and emotion…wow xx

  • Wendy Slee replied

    thank you Shelly…... I think we can all recognize a part of ourselves/our lives in this…..

  • liesbeth

    liesbeth

    We have two sons.. now almost 19 and 17 ..the second son didn’t agree on getting into this world again… almost wanting more then he could do.. until he could walk.. as if from that moment he was free to go where he wanted to be..smile

  • Wendy Slee replied

    smiles back to you….ANd your boys!

  • MooseMan

    MooseMan

    Awesome details you’ve woven together, Wendy… you pull at the heart of every one of us who has been fortunate enough to have loved a child. Don’t ever do this again!!! :) :) ...how’s a guy supposed to maintain the manly man image when you write stuff like that?! :)

  • Wendy Slee replied

    wonder if i can put a “safe” filter on for stuff like this then..protect you big boys a little…lol
    ;-))
    thanks Ted, I appreciate your sincerity and comments…..

  • lianne

    lianne

    I have no words to express how meaningful and magnificent and touching this incredible piece of writing is! Such tenderness, such recognition of the realities all mothers face, and such amazing wisdom, Wendy. I’m so deeply touched – I too have a daughter and have often thought this way but never been able to put it into words so profoundly beautiful!

  • Wendy Slee replied

    oh Lianne, thank you from my heart….what a beautiful compliment…....it is wonderful to know how we are all connected in the things we experience in this life…...so many common bonds/memories/feelings…
    hugs!

  • Ravenor

    Ravenor

    Wendy! – beautiful!!

  • Wendy Slee replied

    :-)))) thank you Ray

  • LindaR

    LindaR

    my eyes are so full of tears as you’ve filled my heart and my own memories of my own babies now grown came coursing back as I read your verse…such a precious time, so much wisdom of then and now…and the truest part of parenting is the privilege to be a part of their lives from the beginning…Wendy you speak so beautifully to the deepest part of me/us when you write…how can we thank you? I express my thanks all the same…now where are my tissues? heartful hugs xxx

  • Wendy Slee replied

    hugs to you dear LInda…it is so nice to share with you xxx

  • Virginia McGowan

    Virginia McGowan

    Beautiful..........................................................(((()))) G..wipes away tears…......Desids to leave them there…..((()))

  • Wendy Slee replied

    aaah, those tears are beautiful aren’t they…...hugs xx

  • WayoftheWarrior

    WayoftheWarrior

    WOW!!!

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Cheers! :-)

  • Snapshot20

    Snapshot20

    Very moving and interesting.
    Kaiden

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you Kaiden :-)

  • Wayne Cook

    Wayne Cook

    How your writing speaks….You draw tears like like soothing rain.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you for sharing and commenting…..smiles to you…

  • pixie3

    pixie3

    Wow…....Wendy so very true!!.....This has hit a very emotional part of me!! Beautiful…stunning…instant fave

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Hugs….thank you Marci!

  • TeriLee

    TeriLee

    OH MY!!! I had to stop in the middle to wipe the tears away…wow!!! I have a 13 year old daughter…this really touched my heart….

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Wait till she leaves home…that was when I wrote this for my oldest daughter…... thanks so much TeriLee… :-))

  • frogster

    frogster

    Stunning writting my friend

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you Larry…..(smiles)

  • Crowmanic

    Crowmanic

    Fair enough response, dear Wendy … I reckon I get it … from your POV … (curious why you haven’t to a few other comments I’ve posited a frew days back?) RBmail is an option …

  • Wendy Slee replied

    scratching my head…did i miss something? lol ;-))
    (knowing me, probably did…..)

  • jennyfnf

    jennyfnf

    Alright Wendy, you have touched deep in my heart, no doubt about that, and the heart of anyone who has given birth and nourished another soul. Thankyou – we forget sometimes.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    It was easy for me to forget, i even forgot I had written this, so was nice to be reminded and to honour the feelings and memories again…
    thank you so much!

  • Aurora Pintore

    Aurora Pintore

    It is a very very beautiful poem Wendi, I like it very much !!!!

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Dear Aurora, thank you so much!

  • LindaMcCarthy

    LindaMcCarthy

    So beautifully amd poignantly expressed. My eyes are wet.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you Linda

  • Chanel2

    Chanel2

    Beautifully written Wendy.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thanks so much Cathryn :-)

  • PJ Ryan

    PJ Ryan

    beautiful and something for every parent and every child

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you so much Nicole….. coming from a talented writer such as yourself, I am honoured….

  • Kelly  J

    Kelly J

    I cannot speak.. x

  • Wendy Slee replied

    You will.
    Dear Kelly, you will…hugs xx

  • Danielle Knight

    Danielle Knight

    What beautiful writing Wendy, our children are such precious gifts. Your first verse in particular (for me) is amazing, I have read that verse over and over again, just perfect. Thank you for sharing this.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you so much Danielle, for your sincere and thoughtful comments….. I really appreciate you!

  • Kelly  J

    Kelly J

    I hope my friend.. x

  • JenniferB

    JenniferB

    beautiful writing, now that’s the kind of muse I’d like to find again!

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you JB….. I believe your muse is right where she needs to be, looking at your artwork, especially today’s new ones….. you have not lost anything….but are growing in every way…..
    Don’t stop believing….you are so talented!!!

  • mistletoes

    mistletoes

    Wendy, when I read or hear something that is an absolute truth, my blood tingles and the hairs on my arms prickle and stand erect,,,your writing is beautiful; I tingle and I prickle now, and it feels good.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    thank you so much…! do you know?...I have the same reaction.!!...I always find that I get the goosebumps and tears prickle my eyes…...to me it is spirit standing beside me saying “so glad you paid attention – this is real”....
    I am truly honoured….thank you!!! hugs!!!

  • nonameyetaglam

    nonameyetaglam

    Wow! Powerful stuff and beautifully written. Thank you for sharing this.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you so much !

  • LindaMcCarthy

    LindaMcCarthy

    “My earthly senses beheld you as my spirit welcomed you back,”
    echoes through me..so true.
    What a beautiful, powerful poem and expression of unselfish love. My heart is full and my eyes are wet. Thank you, Wendy.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    what a beautiful and heartfelt response to my words…I am deeply humbled by your lovely comment!

  • amarica

    amarica

    You have moved me to tears with this beautiful poem Wendy…I love it. I do not totally agree with the separation part because I believe we are joined with our children in a way that can never be broken even though we may be separated by miles or years, they will always be ours in our hearts, in our thoughts, in our souls and in our lives….but I love this, beautifully written…instant fav…hugzzzzzzz

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Thank you for your wonderful and honest comment….I do appreciate your sharing…... I think for me, the separation comment came from an awareness of the deepest root of postnatal depression…... where it is a type of grieving for that most amazing connection we have with our child still inside us…....

  • Matt Penfold

    Matt Penfold

    Wendy, this is a very beautiful and moving piece, for me it conjures up old memories of Kahlil Gibran’s The Prophet
    “Your children are not your children.
    They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
    They come through you but not from you,
    And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.”
    :o)

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Kahlil Gibran is a constant inspiration to me. He is my favourite poet ever and unfortunately (or fortunately) I often find his “voice” appears in my work….without me realizing it. Thank you Matt…..

  • linskudd

    linskudd

    This is so beautiful Wendy. It made me cry – as it resonated with my feelings so well. Love it.

  • Wendy Slee replied

    Lindsay, sorry for making you cry, but thank you for reading and sharing with me. I really appreciate your thoughtful comments on my work….(so nice to share with special people!)

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