Bad Craziness
An old joke revisited.
Bad Craziness belongs to the following groups:
All Things Poetic, Artistic, Philosophical, Humour Captured and Something To Say1. If a man speaks in a forest, and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?
1a. Of course not. As proof, witness the following:
A. Only crazy people are right all the time.
B. Only crazy people talk to themselves.
C. Therefore a man talking to himself is right. Crazy, but right.
D. None of the above applies to women.
2. If a group of men are talking, and there is no woman around to hear them, are they still wrong?
2a. Of course not. As proof, witness the following:
A. A group of men with no woman around to ride herd on them invariably gets crazy.
B. Crazy people are always right. (See 1aA above.)
C. Therefore a group of men without women, though not crazy yet, are getting there, and when they arrive, they will be right.
D. Unless, of course, a woman arrives first.
3. So if a woman shows up while a group of men are talking, they automatically become wrong?
3a. Of course not. As proof, witness the following:
A. Once a woman shows up, the entire focus of the men shifts to her and they go into their various mating rituals.
B. Each man is thoroughly convinced that his particular mating dance and attributes are exactly what this particular random female needs.
C. Which is crazy and therefore, according to 1aA above, exactly right.
4. But how can each man be right in supposing that he is the one any random female needs? Couldn’t only one of them be right, if even that?
4a. Silly boy, to know so little of love. Let me break it down for you:
A. Humans, male or female, are insatiable.
B. Therefore at any given moment one of the men is right, and the others crazy. Or they are all crazy.
C. Therefore, according to 1aA above, they are all right.
5. So what if a group of men are talking and a bunch of women show up, what happens then?
5a. Then they all go crazy. My gosh, child, haven’t you figured it out yet. We’re all **ing crazy.
A. Truly crazy people don’t know they’re crazy.
B. None of us know we’re crazy.
C. Which makes us crazy, which makes us, according to 1aA above, right.
6. None of the above applies to women, except 4aA above.
So women are right when they think men are wrong?
Of course. Women are infallible.
But doesn’t that mean women are crazy?
Didn’t you see Rule Number Six? The infallibility of women means only that men are wrong, invariably and absolutely wrong wrong wrong. Nothing else.
Okay. So if a man in a big hall, a cathedral, say, is talking to himself in a loud voice, and a woman up in the apse doesn’t actually hear him but she does hear the echoes. . .
Then the echoes are wrong! Don’t you have something better to do?
Not really. So everything you’ve said was wrong, right, because you’re a man and. . .
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