silentcries

We all need love and encouragement! Don’t feel bad about that! It’s ok to whine a little :D I know we’re all just online, but think about it. For each comment and whatnot, there is an actual person who out of everywhere they could be online their looking and commenting on your site! :D Congratz on all of those sales also, I saw them on your blog. I even thought to myself “Wow, Fa’s is a superstar!” LOL, cause you are! Congratz on the great meeting, and Im checking out PaTH now :D!

You know it is ok when you feel alone to just let us (your friends online) know about your day or whatnot through blogging. Thats perfectly fine, who cares if we didn’t ask. We’re just as happy to hear about it :D
(I say this because that was always my problem! I felt alone but felt that no one cared about anything I did or said….that is until I just started writing blogs just for the hell of it. When people actually read them and responded to them it surprised the hell out me. People do care!)

Alright, as always Fa, you my girl! Hugz hugz! I know you’re working hard but remember you are already so successful! green with envy ^ _ ^. And the only one that credit can go to is you! Great job :D

Oh yeah, and if you want someone to talk to bubble mail me, Man. Ain’t ever a problem! I’d probably be right there like the loser I am! ;) But seriously if you ever need someone to talk to don’t hesitate!

Heigh Fa!! I’m so happy for you and your accomplishments with your art!!That’s great!! :D
I soo know what you are going through, I’m currently taking meds everyday and docs trying to find which ones work for me…I am however so greatful for this site, it sort of keeps me going everyday! Well, some days I’m like you and am on here but can’t comment or talk to anyone…but I am more positive being here :D
I wish you the best…you are an awesome person!! And send me a Bmail anytime! ;D

I feel for you and have total empathy- dont feel bad about a thing- I wish REAL life was more like bubble life and struggle with similiar issues.
You are the most talented designer- a true inspiration to many people here.
Hugs xxxxxx

Peace love and light to you…............

We’re in the background, waiting for you to call on us Fa! :))))
When you want/need us, poof we appear!! magic :)
Take good care of yourself girl, we’re all the redbubblers in the dark, in the corner of your room at night sending you lots of love and encouragements, so you see, you’re not alone! :))))))
XXX

Hey Fa!!!! I know where your coming from my friend!! would Life be great if it was just like the Bubble??!!! I too have days where i came here just to read the comments but cant reply just cant do it! I love the bubble so many wonderful caring people!! makes me wish the people in my real life could be the same!! we all need to feel loved hunny!!
You Rock you are awesum my friend!! BMail me any time!! (((((((((((((((huggles)))))))))) xx

Hi Fa…

i too come to red bubble and lately find it so much harder to reply to my comments…I feel a lot of the oomph and caring has left me, and leaves little for others, heck, I’m finding it an effort and a struggle to come up with any inspiration….and I feel so sad sometimes…....you are so right in that life can be very draining, difficult and tiresome sometimes, even WITH lots of support from friends and family…..even with all that, we can still feel lonely and alone, it’s how we see ourselves, it’s how we self-isolate…..and i want you to remember something, even tho I have a family and I do count on their support, I also am very lonely most of the time, they don’t understand the heart and mind and life and souldof an artist necessarily, although they try hard…the only people i’ve ever found that truly do, are OTHER ARTISTS, that is what keeps me coming back to this place.

That is why you come back again and again I guess, looking for confirmation that we are ok….just as we are….. we look for and hope for, people who’ll love us…i know i do…and i know how much I care for you, it breaks my heart, that nothing hits the spot for you right now… I hope that you’ll see Grace and things will start to seem clearer for you…I hope you can share all your feelings with her.

I’ve noticed quite a change in you over the last few months myself fa….i asked Sarah and she too feels that, even though we don’t know you personally, you have gone from the bubbly bright girl i once knew to a much darker and sadder place, and you are withdrawing, and this is ok only for a little while, but… it worries and fills me with concern, that you are withdrawing so much….but I think if you talk to Grace? there is no point just forcing yourself to communicate, i think it’s important to understand why you can’t/don’t want to and what’s behind that….once you address that, it will come more easily to you again…because you’ll understand why you do it….i think this time, you have just pushed yourself to communicate and it’s taken a toll on you and now you feel exhausted….but the others are right, you need to tell us exactly what you need from us, so that we can give that to you…it is too hard to guess…. I mean, would you like us to bmail you more often? Would you like us to comment on your works more here and at Zazzle, would you like us to write you ‘real’ letters in our own handwriting….would you like to know how we see you, your good points…...let us know HOW we can help you, as we are your friends, and everyone here is expressing the same thing, we’d like to help, but don’t know how to, or what you need. We are all on a journey just like you.

i wish so much that all the love in the world could snap you out of feeling this way…but i think perhaps the one person you are going to need love from, has been hiding away….i think that person is you…. if you were loving you, you would not deny yourself your tears, I know that sounds tuff, but i mean it wholeheartedly, until you decide you are going to express yourself at home, i’m getting the message that you don’t think your feelings matter…AND THEY DO!!! and you have a right to express them, and to tell people when they are hurting you. All this keeping face is a problem for me. I think it’s wrong.

No matter what your mum says or does..if i were you, I would howl my heart out right in front of her, keeping face because she may say something mean is only driving you deeper and darker into despair….. cry out aloud in front of her and your brother, what is there to lose, they can’t hurt you more than they’ve hurt you already, and they should see your pain and your suffering, after all….it’s really that which you are bearing….it’s really the pain your mum has caused you, that is the reason for all this….why not show her your pain….why not yell at her….why keep total control all the time, as i may have mentioned before, this sort of control over yourself, could well lead to an explosion…..you have to let it all out fa… i wish i was there, i would encourage you to explore and express your feelings to your mother out looud….i would encourage you to tell her exactly how you feel and what you are and aren’t going to put up with any more…because i know that in the end, that’s exactly what i would do, if i were in your position.

Anyway, that’s enough ranting and raving from me, i guess it’s easy for me to say all this, because i’m far removed from your situation at home, but i think you shouldn’t put up with it….but unless you tell her….i don’t know how else things can change…....it’ll require some more energy from you at least, to change your own behaviours….so right now, what you are doing is the same old behaviour or withdrawing and shutting down, and i think as Grace says, this situation requires you to do something a bit different from this…but you must have her help and assistance, because i am a long way away, it’s difficult to advise you.

Try something different, don’t be too radical about it, but try responding to her differently, rather than shut down, which is harming you, making you seem very distant from us…....this is not a good thing.

I’m thinking of you fa….always…..karin xoxoxoxoxoxox

Oh Fa… I feel your pain and totally understand. I just really hope you can pull through this. I wonder why your medication doesn’t work? It seems to be a mystery hey. Like many others on here I have not felt as engaged with the bubble for a while. I feel like it’s a total effort to reply to comments that people leave me… and even more of an effort when I see all the artwork other people have added sitting there in my activity monitor. Sometimes I have a half-hearted look… but a lot of the time it’s just too much for me to have to think of new and wonderfully inspirational comments to make. I usually just scan through to see if any of my fave people have added work, and try with all my heart to leave a comment, but for most of the others I just can’t bring myself to. I feel like I’ve withdrawn a lot… a damn lot… I wish I hadn’t, but I’m not sure how to get my enthusiasm back. I’m in the process of trying a different medication because my first one stopped working, and know the feeling of just wanting to be able to curl up in a little ball and sleep the days away. I struggle to get out of bed most days… I mean I do because I just have to – work and all that – but if I had my way I’d just keep on sleeping. I’ve taken the new medication for about a week now and I think I can feel a slight improvement. Nobody knows the feeling of having a “foggy” and “mixed up” head… and nobody knows how great it feels when that fog clears and you can think clearly. It’s such a FANTASTIC feeling. I am confident that you will experience that again soon Fa… I am sorry if I haven’t been in touch with you recently, but I know that when you feel this way sometimes you just need to be by yourself… but I also know how important it is to accept encouragement and help and advice from those friends around you. It’s a hard situation – you SOOOO much want to be included in society and to feel worthy and wanted and loved etc… but at the same time you can’t muster up the strength to make that happen… You feel as if you’re not capable of returning that friendship and love because your head hurts so damn much.

I guess I’ve been rambling on a bit here Fa… sorry! But I just want you to know that we ALL think of you often and wonder how you’re doing. I don’t really know what your family situation is, but I’m just very lucky to have a wonderfully supportive family and partner around me. Try to keep your head above water, particularly at this time of year when things can get very hectic and overwhelming.

I’m so very happy that your cart has been approved – YIPPEE!!!!!!!! I bet that will give you a boost of energy when you start it!

Anyway, please bubblemail me if you ever need a shoulder to lean on… Sometimes it’s very therapeutic just to pour your heart out to someone – let all your emotions out, rather than keep them bottled up and all to yourself.

Love Karen xoxoxoxox